Archive | February, 2008

Where is the LOVE?! [Anti-Valentine’s #2] posted-2-13-08

13 Feb

I wasn’t going to do this, but here goes my annual Valentine’s (a.k.a. the day girls are bitches) blog.  I write one every year, and thought I would let it go this year.  You’ve heard my case, after all, but after hearing the girls at work, I feel the need to reiterate it.

Number 1 problem:  You think I’m writing this because I’m single and bitter.  The fact you think that just shows how wack February 14th is.

What IS that anyway?  Why is there one holiday that makes single people feel like losers???  People flaunt their “love” and fawning over each other in public, exchanging gifts, generally rubbing everyone else’s noses in their happiness—or feigned happiness as the case may be. . .  If you really loved each other you wouldn’t need a holiday to pander to your significant other, lavishing each other with gifts and romance!  You also wouldn’t need to make other people feel shitty about not having what you do.  I am unconcerned about other people’s relationships, and do not know why they feel the need to brag about them on this day.

Yes, I’m single, but I’m certainly not bitter.  I could be in a relationship if I wanted, but until I find someone up to my standards, I’m holding off—MY choice.   I am unemotional about my single status on Valentine’s Day–does it really mattered if you’re coupled on this particular day of the year?!  Not every single person is sad about being single!  I remember some big downfalls of being part of a couple.  There are pros and cons to each side.

I am also not writing this because I have never gotten anything special on V-Day.  I have had good (typical) valentine’s days in the past.  I have received roses, there were at least 3 years that I got stuffed animals, I have gotten countless cards, candy, and special dinners, AND someone even decorated my high school locker.  It’s not that I just don’t get attention on the 14th.  I hate the day because it’s stupid…..

And no, I wouldn’t change my tune if I was dating someone.  I would still be stoic about participating in this Cool's Canada Pics 015phony event.  I refuse to grovel at anyone’s feet because society and tradition ostracizes me if I chose not to.  I would (and have) shun(ed) this “holiday” even if I was in a relationship.  I remain stolid about the red and pink and don’t celebrate it on principal.

Number 2 problem:  Hallmark is the only one who wins!

Does anyone even know why Valentine’s Day is a holiday in the first place?  Don’t lie—you don’t.  I find it moneyappalling how lacking in sensitivity this day is.  It takes absolutely no thought to carry out the traditions you’re told to on the 14th.  Why are you shamelessly buying into the hype and spending (too much) money on all those stereotypical, thoughtless, cliché gifts?  The price of roses gets jacked up sky high, restaurants have crazy reservation waits, and stores starting putting out their merchandise after New Years.  This holiday is hardly about love—it’s about tired expectations and $$$!

Number 3 problem:  Girls turn into bitches!

The whole holiday is squarely centered on the distaff’s side of things.  Don’t tell me guys like this day.  It isn’t FOR them.  They are apathetic and indifferent to it, except for the fact their women require an overabundance of things.  Guys are impassive about getting flowers or jewelry.  There really isn’t a good Valentine’s Day gift for dudes.  They would even pass on the food if it meant they didn’t have to jump through hoops every February.  Guys have none of the benefit (face it, you’d probably sleep with him holiday or not) but all the work on Valentines day.

evil BarbieThis holiday brings out the worst in females.  I don’t hear anything but selfish, superficial, whiny speculation, then complaining.  Guys can never do well enough!  The girls want presents.  More specifically, something expensive, preferably flowers (better be 12 long-stem roses) or jewelry.  Let’s not kid ourselves—you want both, plus romance.  Securing reservations at the best restaurant isn’t good enough—the guy better do something memorable and spectacular.

The guy will always fail.  Of course he falls below these grand dreams—anyone would.  After the big gift giving, the girl will bitch to her friends that it wasn’t good enough in some way.  All the while parading the gift around—cause ANYTHING is better than being single. . .

Solution:  I’m making my own holiday for February.

Being phlegmatic and trying to ignore this stupid day is not the answer.  Valentine’s Day won’t soon die.  I know, February kinda sucks, especially after all the big holidays have passed.  There are no vernal signs of life and winter can be dreary.  After the holidays and before the spring arrives, people need a little bright spot to look forward to.  We just need some sort of celebration after Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years in the middle of the winter.  I hear you.  MY special day will mean no school or work, this fresh new theme will involve some sort of parade, drinking, and anyone who wants to participate—except bitches!….

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