Archive | 6:08 PM

Moving + Vocab

3 Feb

It’s not that I want to abase Seattle, and especially Aurora Veterinary, but it just wasn’t for me.

I have a feeling we can aggrandize our financial and employment positions and augment our dreams now that we’re outside the hustle of Seattle.

I try to respond with alacrity at work, but not knowing where things are placed is a huge stumbling block.

Our neighbors have already started antagonizing us with their constant loud noise at night–but at least they are not IN our house.

You would think sitting at home unemployed would get banal in a hurry, but the constant financial stress was a good deterrent.

I liked greyhounds, but the bevy of neurotic owners that AVH had turned me off of the breed.

When I start a new job I try to jump in where I can, help do what I know, and be candid about what I don’t know–every hospital is different.

Shared housing was the big catalyst for our move across the state, but our jobs, the pretension of the city, traffic, and more were factors.

I wish employers would call references, so someone else could corroborate that I am a knowledgeable tech and good worker.

I started out in a depressed state, but the declivity went even faster once my housing situation became less than desirable, my car broke down, and I started to hate my job.

The Seattle mentality includes an unwavering pride of the city despite problems, rabid environmentalism, disregard for outside opinions and ways of life, and a severely liberal point of view, among other characteristics that are endemic to those who stay long enough.

Moving is expensive, not having a job is scary, but the fact we moved toward the end of a month and bills were due on the firstexacerbated the financial worries.

Melissa became my friend after the first time I quit, and I felt like she helped exonerate me from my loser status at the hospital.

I have been running at a frenetic pace since I left Missouri April of 2009–I want to take it easier for awhile.

Since I couldn’t depend on a paycheck for almost a month, I had to practice major frugality–only buying necessities, and going without even those sometimes.

I could not be furtive about my dislike of the Emerald City–and the residents didn’t appreciate it at all.

glibly prepared for the move, payed for it, and learned my lesson to save more money next time.

I didn’t like the clientele at Aurora Veterinary Hospital–I felt they were hateful with me from the start, and it caused megrievous stress.

I only find out when my prior vet hospital is using a hoary method when I begin to use it at the new place.

Seattle would like to believe Spokane is an impious anomaly in the state with their lack of rabid environmentalists and pretension, but it is just more down to earth and hit harder by the economy.

Even though my dream of being a veterinarian is still inchoate, at least in Spokane I feel like I’m moving towards it instead of just keeping my head above water in Seattle.

After we moved to Spokane, and before we secured employment, we were inundated with bills.

There is no use lamenting over the past–I tried my best, used the tools I had at the time, and have to accept my new path in life–and a new time-line.

I can see how homeless people get desperate enough to commit larceny–being poor is scary!

I hope the low cost of living will allow us to live a more lavish lifestyle–soon.

Poor Kidron has to train during the swing shift but get up with me at the crack of dawn so she will be lethargic (and more than likely sick) in no time.

Though the weather was mild year around, the constant cloudiness of Seattle made me feel listless.

Beginning work at Cat’s Meow has marred my idea that Aurora was exceptional at following AAHA guidelines and laws–the techs were doing many things that they aren’t supposed to be doing–no wonder I didn’t know some of those things after 9-10 years!

I felt like everyone in Seattle, even those at my job, and even Auntie were militating against me.

Seattle’s shared housing was not for me, because I am somewhat of a misanthrope who would prefer never to see people.

I will appreciate some monotony at work now that I have experience over-booking, lazy co-workers, and otherwise chaotic conditions.

As much as the stupid neighbors nettle me at night, it is STILL so much better than Tabitha, the frat house, or living with Auntie!

The U-Haul and car rental companies are permeated with scams–most of the moving money went to these expensive entities.

The next door neighbors are plebeian, smoking on the balcony, getting drunk every weekend, partying all night, and shouting in the stairwell at inappropriate hours–real trailer trash.

Debbie next door loudly prattles on and on (outside her apartment) from 11 PM until she passes out at 2-3 AM.

I am motivated to have my savings proliferate at a rapid pace so I can buy a car and other needfuls.

Of course I am still restive about my future and have no intention of staying in Spokane for life.

Before she hired me, my boss asked if swearing offended me and warned me of her ribald nature–as if I didn’t have ten years of experience at vet hospitas!

Despite plenty of time off for moving, my desire for a fun vacation hasn’t been satiated–packing, driving, and settling in a new place as well as wondering if and when you will get a paycheck to make the bills is hardly relaxing!

I wish Cool could find some sinecure that gave her sweet hours and paid her well so she wouldn’t have to be so anxious and we wouldn’t have to worry about money.

I am naturally an early riser, so I wasn’t too terribly soporific when I had to wake up at 6 AM to get to work.

My boss might be impatient–what vet isn’t–but at least she doesn’t have the volatile temperament of Ev.

Almost as soon as I arrived, whether it was because I came under duress or because of the people I met, I unequivocallyhated Seattle–it just wasn’t for me.

Since we are so short of funding, I have become a zealot about our spending habits–really watching every penny.


3 Feb

I just read a news article that almost made my physically ill–I’m sure I am ghostly pallid and I know I am shaken.  The apartment complex directly next door has a bunch of trash stacked on the side of the building.  It’s been there since we moved to Spokane in mid-September.  I had no idea why some apartment would besmirch the premesis with random trash!  Very recently I noticed a tarp on the opposite side of the building with trash.  When I looked closer, I saw evidence of a major fire.  One entire side of the building was desiccated so much that I do not know how I didn’t see it before.  So of course I was curious about the origin and time of the fire so I looked it up on the internet.  Surprisingly, the fire had gleaned a lot of media attention.

On September 4, at 2:30 AM, there was a four alarm fire call to that complex.  It doesn’t say how long it took to get the flames to subside, but by the time the flames were extinguished the third floor was almost entirely damaged and 21 ( think) apartments were deemed uninhabitable, displacing 60 residents.  Avista turned off the utilities to the building to stop any further electrical or water damage.  Apparently, apartment complexes are only liable for structural damage–not personal property of tenants or housing for the extricated people.  Anyway, there was a shelter set up for the victims at a local elementary school.

Turns out, the fire started because a third floor resident inappropriately put out his cigarette in a potted plant on the balcony.  And the dope was unaware of anything irregular, and was awoken to neighbors knocking on his door warning him to evacuate!  Also, he deleteriously stored gasoline on the same balcony, so when the cig sparked, the gas ignighted.  The siding on the building was no help either, as it was very flammable.  I wonder if a person that causes a fire deemed “accidental” faces criminal charges.  That retard just messed up the lives of 60 residents, not to mention property management.  The news said neither the coterie of firemen who helped put out the blaze or residents were injured or killed, but I can’t help but wonder if all the pets made it out unscathed.  The three little girls that lived in the originating apartment were sad their birds perished in the flames.  Who knows what other pets were left to burn–I shudder to think. . .

This sort of thing scares me to death!  I have to trust our lives, the lives of my pets, and all our belongings to my neighbors?!  It makes me long for the day when I can forswear apartment living all together!  And I know most of the people living in apartment complexes are idiots–that smoke.  We have balconies and people are smoking on them all the time.  It makes me wonder how they are extinguishing their cigarette and what they are keeping on the balcony.  Has anyone made rules or checked?  I have no idea.  Even if it makes me look officious, I wrote my apartment complex asking them to reassure me that some recent precautions have been taken in light of the fire in such close proximity.  I want our management to be flippin’vehement about fire prevention now that I know the story about the building next door.

I have always been terrified of a house fire–I guess I never thought I had to worry about my dumb neighbors on top of my own activities.  I have been fairly voluble about the problem to our current landlord–because I am honestly afraid.  I was verbose in my side-notes on the lease, criticizing the lack of smoking rules, and noting how though the lease prohibits BBQs, most balcony’s have one out there.  The landlord has remained consistently glib to the point of condoning fires, saying, “Accidents happen. . .”  Kidron also disregards the risks saying I should bother our landlord or be so talkative about my fire-fears, but you haven’t met our neighbors–I would be surprised if they DIDN’T cause a fire!  Cool is embarrassed that I am loquacious about living problems, but I would be more mortified if I held my tongue, and something terrible did happen when I didn’t at least try to prevent it.  I have never had a problem speaking easily about what I feel is right and wrong–but it HAS gotten me in trouble time and again.  I do not easily pardon people of irresponsible acts.  I wanted to leave our lease unsigned until the landlord made substantial changes to prevent fires, but ended up being pressured by Cool and without courage to stand my ground.

The landlord either doesn’t care about the risks or is pusillanimous to lose tenants, because she completely downplayed all my fire-safety concerns.  She completely exculpates the neighbors of any wrong-doing, no matter the consequences.  I was not too timid in my e-mail correspondence to the landlord, going as far as to tell her I would involve the fire department if I had cause to fear for my safety.  I would just hate to have cowardly responses to the landlord then have the complex, all my belongings, my cats, and our lives be taken by an accidental fire caused by the apathy of a landlord who remits people breaking rules and the dumb neighbors themselves.

Alex Carter, reporter for MSNBC writes, “Each year, outside cooking grills cause more than 6,000 fires, kill five people (and injure more than 170 others) and destroy about $35 million in property according to records compiled by the National Fire Data Center of the U.S. Fire Administration.”  So why is it that my landlord is so unconcerned?  When I asked for assurance of precautions she doesn’t address the smoking or BBQs on balconies at all, saying instead, ”  It seems it is less awkward to disregard the rules rather than being the bad guy and enforcing them.

Kidron = Love

3 Feb

What You Do For Me:
-You are so generous in sharing your HHR, trusting me to drive it alone, and giving me rides everywhere.
-You cook yummy food for me, and always make it just the right spicy.
-It’s nice that you pay the phone bill without asking for my share a lot of the time.
-You overlook my faults.
-You don’t mention things when you know it will embarrass me.
-Without complaint, you help keep the apartment clean.
-You understand my parents are crazy, but don’t criticize.
-You make me feel like I’m funny.
-You make me laugh.

-The way we can talk for hours shows how we are meant for each other.
-I truly believe “The Finger” pushed us together, and you are my soul-mate.
-We can spend an unlimited amount of time together without getting irritable or feeling stifled.
-You give me lovin’s until I’m satiated.

-It gets me hot when you talk dirty to me.
-Your kisses are so loving and so sexy.
-I think it’s great that we are the same height.
-I’m so happy you are a non-smoker.
-I’m relieved that you take hygiene so seriously.
-It is so nice to be with someone who constantly removes unwanted hair.
-You initiate affection, even when I’m grumpy/stressed/busy.

-The fact you are well-read is refreshing.
-Your grammar and spelling abilities are impeccable.
-I am impressed with your typing skills.

-You are a much nicer person than I am.
-I appreciate the fact you are loyal to your friends.

Tiredness Makes Me Emo

3 Feb

My Seattle friend wrote my other Seattle friend (I made 2 the entire year I was there) an invitation to have a drink, then opened the invitation up to a girl we all constantly complained about when I lived and worked there.  It made me feel bad to see it.  Did everyone dislike her because of me?  Was I the big trouble-maker and problem at Aurora Veterinary?  Because as soon as I’m gone everyone is FB friends with the girl and going out with her?!  What the fuck!  How can everything change so quickly?  It makes me confused.  I wasn’t even the girl’s biggest detractor. . .  Melissa was the one sparring against this girl most–even handing a written complaint to our employers.  Mostly, I don’t like having to compete at work.  I would rather drop out entirely than fight to restrain animals, draw blood, and complete lab work.

I’m tired so I’m grumpy.  I really hate feeling apathetic.  I feel like fighting and I suppose there is not reason, and every reason for it.  Also, I’m sad.  I haven’t seen Cool in a week, because of her lame swing-shift training.  I hate her job already!  She’s fucked with her normally scheduled hours too:  6 AM to 2:30 in the valley, half hour drive away.  And I don’t like being dependant on her to get me to work in the first place.  It makes me feel like a phlegmatic loser, but buying a car right now is just financially impossible.  And besides, even if I had a car, or could afford one and we didn’t have to car-pool she would be screwed.  As it is we’re both super-screwed!  I hate not having the means to get my own transportation!  Hate that my Jetta broke down. . .  I could ride the bus, but then I’d have to wake up around 5 AM anyway, and I’m afraid to walk (and stand) at the bus stop by myself.  There are a lot of homeless people around and I have a phobia of them.  Bad scene.

Thirdly, I have been trying to get sick.  I have been boxing this illness for about a week now, and I hope it doesn’t kick my ass.  I hope I do not get sick–cause October is my favorite month (though festivities were put on hold for my mates’ training), Halloween is awesome, and our one year anniversary is fast approaching.  Both occasions call for florid celebration, but I’m just not in it.  I am ill-prepared for the big one-year, and am not certain I can drum up enough funds to do it right.  So there is no time for sickness.  I feel pugilism that it’s even an option.


Eminem + Vocab

3 Feb

Marshal Mathers likes to provoke people and says a lot of things just to antagonize certain people, and the audience as a whole..

Mathers’ presence is so catholic, even people who live under a rock have heard of him.

When Em explains away some of his beefs, his reasoning is cogent most of the time.

Who can blame someone like Em, who grew up in poverty, for his cupidity for money?

As coarse as the lyrics are, Eminem writes with eloquence and explains a lot of things about his life.

Eminem’s voice is unique–endemic to him.

It seemed Eminem was an instant success, but the gestation of his career was a long one.

His characteristic facial expression is a glower.

“8 Mile” was a semi-autobiographical movie about Marshall Mathers’ inchoate career.

It is expected that Eminem utilizes the typical rapper jargon and street slang in his music.

Eminem talks about the knell that follows his Uncle Ronnie’s suicide.

My favorite Eminem songs are the ones where he explains his douch-y behavior and laments about past tragedies.

It’s funny when Em lampoons Dr. Dre or his producers.

Like all rappers, Marshall Mathers must employ a lapidary the way he sports his bling.

I would be completely leery at an Eminem concert–it’s probably a bunch of thugs.

Marshall employs such legerdemain as name-dropping, making up stories about famous people, and featuring other popular artists in his songs to sell records.

Even though Eminem must be rich, he has never become lethargic–he is quite prolific as an artist.

You can tell his daughter Hailey, makes him luminous.

Eminem portrays his producer as a martinet–but I’m pretty sure there is no controlling Mathers.

I suspect a lot of the lines in his raps, especially about celebrities, are mendacious–though I believe the things he says about his own family.

I would never want to meet Marshall Mathers in person, because I imagine he’s quite mercurial.

Numerous groups have been militating again the rapper’s career since he became popular.

I’m sure Eminem is responsible for several neologisms.

As a neophyte rapper, Eminem had to struggle against inverse racism from the predominately black  rap community.

I think Em gets a big kick about nettling his adversaries.

Listening to the nuances (and blatant messages) in Eminem’s music could certainly contribute to homophobia, masochism, and ignorance.

The singer practices numismatics in the sense he collects America’s money after selling a record number of albums.

Em is obstinate in his beefs–he holds a grudge forever!

Eminem has permeated the culture with his raps.

Eminem has said numerous disparaging remarks about “faggots” so it seemed a little plastic and contrived when he did a duet with openly gay Elton John.

He can go on tangents and prattle about his many beefs with–well, everybody.

Even the shortest precis about the artist probably mentions a lawsuit of some kind.

Not having a supportive family, dropping out of ninth grade, and abuse problems have probably left Eminem a puerilepersonality that doesn’t know how to deal with life in a mature way.

Though the lyrics can be obnoxious and hateful, I think they are very personal and well-thought out rhetoric for the most part.

Eminem seems a sardonic type-using negativity to vent his pain.

Mathers has a soporific touring schedule that caused him to bun out for awhile.

The songs are meant to be listened to at stentorian parties or gatherings.

I don’t think Eminem employs any sneaky stratagems to get back at his enemies–I think his up front about getting revenge.

Eminem’s wiki entry is long and tome-like because of his commercial success and his legal struggles.

Some of Em’s success is credited to his trenchant observations, and his discourse on politics and current events.

I picture Em as a wily sort of guy who can’t really back up his big talk.

Luckily for him, Eminem”s career is yoked to Dr. Dre’s.

Religious zealots, feminists, and the gay community as well as assorted celebrities and relations rail against the content of the lyrics.


Judgement + Vocab

3 Feb

When I was growing up in Dayton, I was never one (of the many) who thought Dayton was insipid and longed to leave as soon as possible.

I love all the opportunities I was able to take advantage of because I grew up in a small, “bland” town.

I’m really happy I got to grow up in a stale town where I was shielded from the troubles of a big city.

I like that I forged lifelong friendships with the kids I went to our vapid school with for 16 years, and I like surrounding myself with them (on Facebook).

It’s not like I don’t have ethics and morals–as a matter of fact mine are more upstanding than most, so I wish Dayton wouldabate their judgment and save it more people who deserve their wrath.

My current behavior is not too aberrant from the values I grew up with.

Sure, Dayton might have been dull, but it’s not like Missouri was “party-town” or anything like that–I wasn’t negatively influenced there.

I would like to amass support from my hometown rather than judgement.

Mary’s “lifestyle” is anomalous from what the Dayton community is used to or expects, so she hides herself.

Faces ashen with horror and disbelief, the judgmental continue to make everyone else feel bad, while they themselves aren’t free from sin.

This mind-set in exactly why Mary had blanched her public image to such an extent.

I should hardly become a castaway because I have partaken in alcohol (or even gotten drunk) in my life–I am of age and haven’t harmed anyone else because of it.

It’s the most cherubic people that don’t judge others–because everyone sins.

People are commended when they are exactly the same as everybody else.

Upstanding morals are preferable, but they become deleterious when ethics are on the verge of narrow-mindedness.

Sure there are tons of people who could use a good admonishment–save your (narrow-minded) opinions for the derelictsand convicts.

Just because something is divergent from what you do, doesn’t make it sinister or wrong.

I gave up on trying to flatter everyone by being superbly behaved–you just can’t please everyone.

In school, I garnered a lot of negative attention for being the outspoken, unruly one–then in college I was seen as prudish and naive.

It’s a gradation:  There are normal offenses everyone commits at one time or another, such as getting drunk or pocketing a $20 you find on the street, then there are large crimes that come with a felony or serious injury to another.

When I was younger, I eventually learned a person cannot be heavenly all the time or to everyone.

As a child and teenager, I attempted to ingratiate myself to the community by trying to live up to their impossible standards.

Facebook can be inimical when you have a mix of intimate friends, coworkers, and your entire small hometown on your friend’s list.

Don’t get my wrong, I hardly laud shit-heads who break the rules, have no boundaries, and do all sorts of harm–I just think no one can demand perfection.

Without different viewpoints and ways of living, life would be quite banal and pallid.

I hate when ultraconservatives make me feel like a pariah for doing normal things that everyone has done–especially if those people are from my home-town of Dayton.

If Dayton would only relent and admit everyone makes mistakes (or just lives) they would be a lot happier.

I can guarantee that those same people criticizing me have not lived an entirely seraphic life.

Part of Mary’s problem was that she felt she had to subside her entire being, curb her whole personality when she was in public, and this created a substantial dichotomy.

Despite being voted “biggest kiss up” in high school (a complete embarrassment) I have never been one to ingratiatemyself to others.  I figure I can only be myself and flattering people that don’t even matter is a huge waste of my time and energy.  I can be polite and as an only-child I get along well with adults (and always have) but I don’t do it to curry favor.

The chaos that led to and upheld the Cabin-Mansion

3 Feb

At first, I thought the Cabin-Mansion was really fancy with the loft, sky light, huge television, bar, and pool table on the inside and top-of-the-line spa, wrap-around deck, outside fireplace, and lovely view outside, but as I began to SEE the people in the atmosphere, the whole place became austere to me.  My expectations and environment became a paradox:  Where I had been anxious to get back to Dayton during those first days at school, I soon began to dread the sight of the bleaklandscape that was the Cabin-Mansion.

After I learned everyone was crazy, living there seemed grim and cold.  Even the vet hospital, which I had always loved, became a more harsh place to spend time.  It was also a contradiction–I loved being there as I always had, save for the fact Mary was acting hateful and ridiculous.  Mary’s constant dour expressions towards me, especially, made it all the harder to be there.  The desert was still beautiful, but after I became depressed the view took a harder, more desolate tone.  Then, the weather became severe and made the Cabin-Mansion, and Dayton, and Reno just awful places to live and work.

My view of my former mentor is ambiguous to this day:  I miss who I used to know, and can understand how she became the person she is, but I absolutely resent the way she treated me.  I’m not certain what I would do if Mary tried to contact me to disabuse all the damage that was done in 2007.  I cannot imagine Mary would ever try to set right her wrongs, anyhow.  Kim attempted in a feeble way to make Mary free of errors that were made by apologizing on her behalf–it’s not the same.  The sketchy behavior will never be corrected–I’m certain Mary will always blame me and exculpate herself from any blame.  Dayton will never be undeceived by Mary’s ruse–even if I do get my tell-all book published.  No matter how sorry Kim is, Mary’s behavior towards me was not innocuous.  My self-worth was deeply injured after I left the Cabin-Mansion–the constant games were hardly insipid.

So many things were wrong at that time–there is nothing incongruous about that.  My parents were not harmless to my well-being at that time in my life either–they damaged me a lot too.  Kim’s drinking was also not as benign as everyone in the inner circle tried to portray–she is going to probably die from her alcoholism.  Mary’s cheating was not inoffensive, though it didn’t directly affect me–I was crushed by her lack of morals.  After I witnessed Mary head-butting Kim in a drunken brawl, all propriety that had been securely in place for the duration of our relationship was forgotten.

Mary’s decorum towards me was aloof at best and downright mean at worst.  I was surprised at the lack of appropriateness in Mary, and didn’t expect such actions from someone turning 40.  Yes, maybe I was acting stupid, but a little guidance, or at the very least decency, could have gone a long way to improve things, rather than the horribleness that only made everything worse.  Mary’s last straw was when I impeded upon her modesty when I refused to look away and let her discretely get out of her hot tub.

Mary, Kathy, and Debi among others I’m sure, formed a cabal eager to knock me down and get me out of Dayton.  Mary acted as if she was a figure in the mob–very secretive and hard-core.  Like stuffed dolls, eager to conform and please and representing patriarchy, Mary’s clan in Dayton is mostly concerned about portraying a respectable image to the community, while living dirty.  This in-group was all cheating, drinking, and generally carousing around when they were old enough to know better.  It seems the gays always form a camp that is opposed to Republicans and church-goers.  Each one of their dummy personas verses their actual behavior created a dilemma–all of them portrayed themselves as pious, while partying.  I could never be involved in a coterie because I am an independent free-thinker.  I could not stand to live an effigy.

When I first went to Nevada, I was fairly adept at remaining incapable of being affected by my crazy parents–but as my morality began to weaken so did my resolve to keep them out of my life.  Mary thought this new version of Laurel was impossible to penetrate, but I felt I had good reason to be stubborn with my parents–I had to maintain certain boundaries for our relationship to grow and to gain my independence from them.  All I wanted was for them to actually listen to my opinions.  I was resistant to my parents at that time because they had become emotionally distant, financially barren, and were trying to control me as they had always done in the past.  Mary used this as an excuse to get me out of her (sketchy) personal business, and became emotionally impregnable towards me as a way of turning the tables.

I tried to be impervious to the atmosphere at the Cabin-Mansion, but failed on all fronts:  I drank too much just like them, was saturated in negativity, self-loathing, and apathy just like I had criticized in them, and I went back to Missouri broken.  Both Mary and my mom have always been dictatorial in their opinions.  Trying to make my own decisions didn’t work as long as those two were so domineering a force in my life–neither of them would ever really hear my voice.  I thought it was ironic that Mary didn’t like my mom for acting so authoritarian when Mary herself was also magisterial over her inner circle, family, and employees.  Like my mother, Mary didn’t respect me or listen to my opines.  Mary kept saying, “It’s none of my business, I’m not getting involved” regarding the deteriorating situation with my parents–yet she became imperious about demanding me to talk to them.  When I didn’t follow Mary’s bossy dictum, she cut off communication with me.  This also coincided with my masterful plan of placing a sock in the guest bed to see if the hairdresser was sleeping in it, or in Mary and Kim’s bed, which proved very, very dumb of me.  As soon as Mary realized I wasn’t stupid and I had seen her cheating, she became adamant about getting me away from her (and Kim) even going as far as to peremptorily ban everyone on her good side from speaking to me.  She was dictatorial in how others were allowed to interact with me–everyone was afraid to be seen talking to me, let alone hanging out with me.  Her doctrinaire hold over everybody amazed me, especially since they had only seen the good in me and didn’t know what I had done wrong.  Soon my overbearing mother didn’t seem so bad compared to Mary’s mob tactics to destroy me.

Spokane Snow-Driving

3 Feb

I would not say I especially cowardly about driving in the snow–though I don’t love it.  Being from the Seattle-area, where it doesn’t snow often, Kidron is pretty timid about driving in snow or ice.  Anyone would be pusillanimous {pew-sul-an-i-mous} about driving the slippery HHR that doesn’t handle well at all in any winter conditions.  Getting to work becomes a byzantine task when the front wheel drive vehicle is not working well at all.

The HHR has the heavy body of an SUV, but only the power of a car so it sucks more than my Jetta in snow–this makes for atangled driving process in any inclement weather at all, ie:  Don’t brake–ever, simply take the foot off the accelerator and come to a natural stop, steer toward the curb for times when the car absolutely refuses to slow, take corners wide and at a maximum of 2 MPH, and never, never attempt to take an incline, but if you must gain speed for momentum, shift into I, and hope the driver behind you is a good samaritan willing to patiently wait–then give you a push. . .

I have to take a convoluted route to work in the snow.  If there is even a slight incline the HHR can’t get up in the ice and snow, which means an intricate snow route is necessary.  I found this out the hard way when I took a complicated route to work, then still had to stop at a stoplight. . .  On a hill.  It took a police officer and another passenger to push me into the Office Depot parking lot.  With Spokane’s numerous maze of one-way streets, the river, freeway, and train tracks–it is a very elaborate endeavor to plan an alternate route.  Finding snow-chains anywhere in the vicinity was even more perplexing of a task–everyone is out now that it has snowed.  I hope the chains that were ordered from get here really fast and are not too complex for us to figure out in a hurry.

Kidron had to skip work altogether because an alternate plan was so labyrinthine:  The bus would take three hours there and three back, taxi services were either completely unavailable or required 2 hour notice and $30 each way, the one person she knows at work comes in from ID and wasn’t answering her phone or Facebook, frustration!  I hate the snow because it makes driving a knotty experience if you don’t have 4-wheel drive.  As a person who hasn’t driven in a front wheel drive vehicle not equipt with snow or all-weather tires, speaking easily about how mild the roads seem is natural.  Until you drive the HHR in snow yourself, I don’t care how talkative you are about its supposed ability to handle the winter–you don’t know (I didn’t).  It’s ironic, because I was voluble about not wasting our few funds on new tires when the HHR had siped tires less than two years old.  Now I’m verbose about how much worse it drives than my Jetta which was not meant for snow in the least bit, and didn’t do great.  After a few precarious snow-drives in the thing, I became loquacious about fixing the problem so we could each get to work safely–poor Kidron!  I guess I was too glib about the status of the tires before it snowed here–had I forgotten what a real winter was like in just one year of living in a mild climate?!

The only way to have levity in a snow storm is to have no reason to leave the house–anyone having to drive to work loses any enthusiasm in a hurry.  My boss said she is a terrible driver, especially in winter, because she has an inappropriate lack of seriousness and gets distracted easily.  I suppose I would be a lot less stressed about winter if I used more humor–who cares if I get stuck in the middle of the road blocking traffic?  It’s winter and it happens to everyone.  That said, I don’t want to be overly casual and wreck the car or kill myself driving around in the snow and ice.  Little kids are the only ones that can really have amusement in winter–if they have a snow day, because they don’t have to drive.

Spokane declared a severe blizzard warning for the first time since the mid-1990s.  The hard winds are what characterize a blizzard–viability has to be really low to call it that.  The temperatures were a grim 16 degrees to as low as 1 degree this morning at 9 AM.  When the city is undecorated (before Christmas) the snow looks especially dour.  After awhile snow starts to look austere, and I long for the more beautiful signs of life in the spring.  Gray skies coupled with white roads and dead trees seem so bleak–especially in late winter.  The poor birds didn’t fly south and were out in the water in this harsh weather.  I don’t remember if Missouri weather was this severe, but I do remember a stern determination was necessary to get to work on time.

People are quick to promote rebellion when it comes to snow plowing.  It’s a thankless job that can never be done fast enough or well enough and people blame some sort of conspiracy instead of realizing this.  I don’t think Spokane deserves the insurrection the online bulletins are promoting–they’ve done a decent job despite treacherous weather conditions and a lack of funds.  On the other hand, the sedition against Seattle’s mayor may have been justified–the dude didn’t have the city plow at all and wouldn’t use ice for environmental reasons–stupid.  Drivers do not show any propriety especially in rain or snow.  It would be decent of everyone to slow down and drive safely when ice and snow or rain are present–but most people belligerently speed by and weave in and out of slower traffic.  The trucks that show the least decorum in bad weather?  Effing 4x4s!  Then there’s the people going 5 MPH who aren’t driving with appropriateness either.  It would be a lot less hazardous in inclement weather if everyone drove with modesty.  Plus, it’s always good when drivers obey the rules and customs of the road–bad weather or not.