When a mullted gal with eyeliner under her lower lash line came in, my boss asked me if I thought she was gay. Because of course, being gay myself, I MUST be an expert! Never-mind, I never set off any gay-dar and therefore don’t get the insider treatment of gays everywhere. There is this certain wink, nod, and trust-instilled when one gay is certain they have found another. It’s a sort of inside secret–but I’m never in on the joke. I do not think I have EVER gotten it. I never get flirted with–especially not by other women. I am just not pegged as gay-looking. As a direct result, I have never had a circle of lesbian friends, and my dating life has been initiated in the confines of directly gay-related events.
Also, never-mind that my entire interaction includes taking the pet’s vitals and asking about the cat–nothing very personal or telling. My observation is as superficial as anyone’s–I must depend on stereotypes such as hair-cut, clothes, or mannarisms–unless someone actually gives me a tangible hint such as mentioning a “parter” or some such thing. But because I am gay, everyone runs to me at work to check their own gay-dar.
Anyway, this interaction or playing, “guess the gay” inspired me to coin a new phrase. I think I made it up, but you never know when you hear something in passing and internalize it. Anyway, here is the title of everyone’s favorite guessing game, a game everyone (straight, gay, and in-between) loves to play: Gay or Nay?