Ugh–I have a week of vacation. I am burned out by my job. I am really, REALLY burned out by catty-bitches (coworkers) at my job. I get disgruntled that I work SO, SO, SO hard and get paid so relatively little. Especially now that this is not my career path so this is a dead-end J-O-B for me. I’m mad when my co-workers who make more money then me, do less work. It’s upsetting that after 12 years of experience and an undergrad degree, Cool can command more money at a call-center temp job with just her diploma. But yet, not enough money to support me in any way.
I find myself fantasizing about being able to work part time. Or better yet, get enough loans that I could be a full-time student and not work at all. Or even get some job that isn’t so stressful. Can’t I just be a Starbucks Barista? I would KILL for that job: Health insurance for part-time hours, free coffee, early morning shifts. . . Basically, I just want my full hour lunch and to come and go when the clock says it’s time, not when the patients are stable. Coffee wouldn’t be life & death–that’s what I want.
I understand that at this point in my life Going to Australia is impractical. Riding the wine-train through Italy an impossibility, and visiting Hawaii and swimming with the turtles is not going to happen. I think it would be awesome to see the hot air balloons in Reno, visit Colorado to see if I want to live there, or at the very least go to pow-wow in Montana or visit Seattle for a concert or food.
But now that Cool has a job–she can’t get ANY days off. She has no holidays. No chance in getting vacation time until she’s hired (not just a temp) AND has been employed for a year. Not only that–she doesn’t even get sick days. Or long weekends. That means I either have to vacation by myself, take my days and stay home, or lose my week off.
It makes me really depressed about where I am in life. I want to be at the point where I have a permanent place to live, all my pets in the same state (as well as my other belongings), a career, and some time off. This situation is just another reminder of how I’m still at the beginning. I am still a renter, still scattered across states, still trying to obtain a professional career, and still having to work as hard as ever at everything.