I Don’t Subscribe to Valentine’s Day

14 Feb

As the obnoxious gay fellow sitting next to me in class found out when he cheerfully asked if I was excited for the impending “holiday.”  If you don’t remember my practical explanations of why the day is created for gains of capitalism, unfair to males, encourages gendered and unreasonable expectations from women, is detrimental to the environment, and HURTS people (diamond miners), look back at my annual blog post.  

2 year anneversary 013

As I have exhausted all angles trying to persuade you to discontinue celebrating such an awful tradition, this year, I appeal to choice.  OK, I get it, February isn’t the greatest month.  Especially following those gigantic holidays of Novemeber, December, and January.  February is back to the grind.  And it’s still cold.  And there’s really nothing real to celebrate until Memorial Day.  By real, I exclude St. Patty’s day, another concocted day that is abused to celebrate getting drunk on green beer.  And Cinco de Mayo, where Mexican restaurants get into the black for the year by peddling. . .  “Mexican” food, and yet more alcohol.  

Lesle's eye-breasts

But I’m getting off the point here are some special events that have occured on February 14 in years past.  And any one of them could have a celebratory holiday devoted to it.  More Worthy Cause for Celebration:

1778:

  • The United States Flag was formally recognized by a foreign naval vessel for the first time, Anatomy 28when French Admiral Toussaint-Guillaume Picquet de la Motte rendered a nine gun salute to USS Ranger, commanded by John Paul Jones.

Yay!  Boating and America and the flag!  What’s not to like?  OK, we already have Flag Day, Independence Day, and you’re not feeling a holiday devoted to sailing for whatever reason.  There’s more:

1794:  1st U.S. textile machinery patent granted, to James Davenport, Philadelphia

Clothes and fashion!  But I see this becoming a capitalistic nightmare–let’s move on.

1872:  1st state bird refuge authorized (Lake Merritt, California)

LF unicornsNothing here to hate on.  And maybe a parade featuring birds would be in order.  Or free admission to all avian-related places.

1876:  A G Bell & Elisha Gray apply separately for telephone patents Supreme Court eventually rules Bell rightful inventor

Yes!  Phones and communication–we cannot live without those.  This could easily take over V-Day with all those Apple-heads everywhere.

1889:  1st train load of fruit (oranges) leaves Los Angeles for east

1899:  U.S. Congress begins using voting machines

Politics get more honest.  But they have a long way to go before a fair system is achieved *cough heffalumps and woozelsabolish lobbies*

1919:  United Parcel Service forms

Again, another service we absolutely could not live without.  

1920:  League of Women Voters forms in Chicago

Girl-Power!

1924:  IBM Corporation founded by Thomas Watson

wine countryMore communication things–I see a trend here. . .

1936:  National Negro Congress organizes in Chicago

Yes!  The beginning of Civil Rights!

1946:  Bank of England nationalized

1963:  U.S. launches communications satellite Syncom 1

1966:  Wilt Chamberlain breaks NBA career scoring record at 20,884 points

Such a great fact, but without drinking involved I’m not sure non-sports enthusiasts would be on Oct 2011 031board–and definitely not so close to Superbowl and the Daytona 500.  Moving on. . .

1966:  Australian currency is decimalised.

1971:  Richard Nixon installs secret taping system in White House

1976:  U.S. performs nuclear test at Nevada Test Site

LF penguinsBoo, hiss to all the resultant nuclear waste getting dumped in the state.

1978:  1st “micro on a chip” patented by Texas Instruments

Communication!  I’m telling you, this needs to be the communication holiday.  Pay homage to all of this technology we can’t get by without for even 10 minutes.

1989:  World’s 1st satellite Skyphone opens

See?

1989:  The first of 24 satellites of the Global Positioning System are placed into orbit.heart flowers

GPS too?  I’ve decided I’m replacing Valentine’s Day with some sort of communication celebration.

1990:  Space probe Voyager 1 takes photograph of entire solar system

All right!  So I think I’ve decided on the history of communication technology holiday.  Now, what makes a holiday great?  Food, definitely   Special beverages for sure.  A parade never hurts.  Something–festive.  And obviously, communicating to many people or in  some awesome way to celebrate history.  Well, we have until next year to decide 🙂  Happy Communication Day everyone!

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