When I think of the people problems I’ve had since I moved to Washington, it makes me feel horrible. I think, why am I having so much trouble now? Am I really THAT much of a $hithead that nobody can tolerate me? It’s totally discouraging.
And it never happened before. Sure, there was a person or two everywhere that I didn’t like or couldn’t get along with–just the normal stuff. But not every person, in every situation! It seems like I act the same ways I always have, but I still have tons of personal troubles.
But Cool reminded me of the Finger (of God). We really believe that the finger made me leave Missouri for vet school. Otherwise I might have stayed there forever–I really liked it. Then, once I lost all ties to MO, it was the Finger who made vet school fall through at the last minute. And the Finger that brought me (not so randomly) to Seattle. But I was never supposed to stay in Washington. My path was just to pick up Cool and go. So Cool reminded me all these interpersonal problems that seemingly come out of nowhere and are so pervasive, are really just a message to move on. The Finger is reminding me that THIS is not where I belong, and ensuring I don’t get too comfortable or too complacent.
I HAVE to have personal strife to remind me we belong elsewhere. So that helped me feel a lot better about all my work and school troubles, the lost friends, and the flakes. It’s just the finger doing it’s thing, I shouldn’t take it so personally.