We call it “getting in the dress code” at home. It means removing uncomfortable clothes, anything heavy, jeans/spandex, taking off bras and shoes–just getting cozy. And it is maybe my favorite thing in the whole world. Being in the dress code recharges my battery. Without time at home to veg out, I feel tired and stressed. Going out can be fun, but it’s also taxing. I like a good trip, an outing, a festivity, but it’s an absolute must that rest time be built around that–or I’m a mess.
As such, I hate days where I’m scheduled to be in multiple places, have to run from obligation to obligation, or those that keep me away from home for too long. It wears me out. And those kinds of days require planning. You have to carry the right clothes and supplies with you, fix portable snacks, plan water so you’ll be near a bathroom when you need it. It’s a real pain.
Today was like that. I agreed to tutor again, had a test in class, then had to rush to meet a work friend for a bike ride. Those events alone would have been enough, but strung together, I was really bummed out. I wore my workout clothes, though I felt a little self-conscious at school. I ate a big breakfast and remembered to bring along my thermos of water. I packed my bike, my coat, my school things, wallet, sports arm wallet, etc, etc. . . It was busy.
The tutoring went a little better–I took more control of the situation. I moved us to the place I liked, asked my tutee the way they studied, took tests, etc, taking the focus off myself, and having to prove my worth as a tutor. Instead of sharing answers or potential test questions, as my subject kept pressing for, I doled out study advice and test-taking tips. My tutee–a brazen thing–tried to get me to give my old class notes over and “lend” all my flashcards. In my head, I was like “No FUCKING way are my materials leaving my site you lazy little shit!” But aloud I suggested it would be studious in itself to formulate your own materials. And recommended getting notes from an actual classmate–so they will be exactly the same. I think since I took the reigns and didn’t let my subject run over the top of me again, things went a little better, and were more helpful.
My tutoring session was cut in half b/c my person scheduled another meeting in the middle and had to leave. So I was at school with an hour and a half to kill. I hate that! Instead of wasting gas and going home, I just took my flashcards and walked the trail studying them. It was a beautiful day and hot so that wasn’t the worst. Except I got sweaty before my test.
*pet-peeve: I can’t stand when I take the time to answer a personal question, sometimes even in writing–and the person I’m communicating with not only doesn’t remember what I said, doesn’t even remember that they should know the answer when they ask all over again. It’s all I can do not to say–shoulda paid attention the first time. Annoying.
I took my test, and had some uncertainties–like usual. We grade them right after taking them, and while we were doing so I became STARVING! I broke my string of 100% (3 in a row) by missing 3 vowels. One was dialectual–“bag” sounds like it has a long a to me, but 2 I probably should have known. I think the hunger and tiredness was at fault. My concentration and mental abilities were not in top form that late in the day, and after much running around. Damn.
After class, I of course was motivated to rush to the Y (one of 3 in town) to meet my friend b/c of my lateness phobia. I knew I wouldn’t be able to bike or have fun if I didn’t eat though. So despite having only 15 min to get all the way across town to North Y, I stopped at the crowded grocery store for a box of wheat thins. Protein would have been better, but I had to grab something (quickly) that I could eat while I drove. And I know right where those are and like them. Plus, I was in a hurry. I got there 8 min late–traffic was crap. And I didn’t see him. Maybe I was the early one because of traffic? So I texted the number from the work phone tree 2-3 times, but heard nothing back. Maybe he was driving and couldn’t text? I struggled to unload my bike and jumped on it. The tires felt drastically low–I guess I should have checked that before packing my bike. Luckily, the bike came with a portable air pump when I bought it at the bike-swap so I went to work on them. They still felt low, but maybe were better(?) when I jumped back on. I guessed I could manage a short ride at least. Except my friend still wasn’t there. I have no watch and Rusty doesn’t have a clock, so I’m dependant on my FitBit. Which happened to be on my foot to count my pedals, so it wasn’t that easy to fuss over time. I just hung out–where usually I’d agonize over every minute ticking by.
Maybe I had an old or wrong phone number and he was somewhere in the parking lot waiting for me? I rode my bike around looking for his truck. I still didn’t see him. Traffic had been pretty ugly and he lives near me, so he also had to go a long way in it, he was probably just caught up. I looked at the surrounding trail, and figured I’d bike a little ways out, and just come back when he called or after awhile to check. The trail was dirt and rocky and rugged. I didn’t want an actual flat, and it felt very perilous like I could fall off at any time due to the slick sand, rocks, grooves, and sudden curves. This was not the kind of ride I’d had in mind! I walked my bike back up to the parking lot.
If I wasn’t going to ride while I waited I figured I had might as well study. As I was sitting in my (hot) car, looking over my notes–it occurred to me maybe we were supposed to meet at the Valley Y, not North that I was at. I wasn’t certain, but something in the very recesses tugged at my mind. Did I go to the wrong location? I doubted myself enough to decide I should go home now (at 5:17PM), because my friend was waiting for me at the other Y, wondering why I had stood him up. Though I’m not positive that’s what happened.
So I never got to meet my friend and ride, nor could I contact him to find out the misunderstanding. I drove all the way, and wasted all that time for nothing. I might have had low blood sugar. I guess just because I don’t have all the signs, doesn’t mean my mind is super-clear. And now that I’m home I feel really tired and very fatigued, though I have a ton of things to study, and papers to write.
But at least I’m at home in my jammies 🙂
ugh.
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