Tag Archives: album

Taylor Swift’s Gay Moments: Lover ~ The Archer (in 3 parts)

4 Mar

I split the songs up on the Lover album as well so we can delve into each one a bit more.

The Archer

In order to show the gay moments of The Archer it’s beneficial to split the song up according to intended audience/subject.

Part 1

Taylor’s internal struggle:

Combat, I’m ready for combat/I say I don’t want that, but what if I do?/…I jump from the train, I ride off alone/I never grew up, it’s getting so old…/…I’ve been the archer/I’ve been the prey/Who could ever leave me, darling?/But who could stay?/…And I cut off my nose just to spite my face/Then I hate my reflection for years and years/I wake in the night, I pace like a ghost/The room is on fire, invisible smoke…/…I’ve been the archer,/I’ve been the prey/Screaming, who could ever leave me, darling?/But who could stay?/(I see right through me, I see right through me)…/…I see right through me/I see right through me…/…I’ve been the archer/I’ve been the prey/Who could ever leave me, darling?/But who could stay?/(I see right through me, I see right through me)…/…Combat, I’m ready for combat

Part 2

Cons of coming out:  media/public/betrayers/enemies/historical evidence it doesn’t end well

‘Cause cruelty wins in the movies…/…But what if I’m alright, right, right, right here?[Lavender Haze]/…And all of my heroes die all alone…/…’Cause they see right through me/They see right through me/They see right through…/…They see right through/They see right through me…/…All the king’s horses, all the king’s men/Couldn’t put me together again…/…’Cause all of my enemies started out friends

Part 3

To the fans

I’ve got a hundred thrown-out speeches I almost said to you/Easy they come, easy they go…/…Help me hold onto you…/…Dark side, I search for your dark side…/…Help me hold onto you…/…Can you see right through me?/…Help me hold onto you…/…Who could stay?/Who could stay?/Who could stay?/You could stay/You could stay/You

Taylor Swift’s Gay Moments: Reputation ~ Links to each song’s post

3 Mar

The songs on Reputation are packed with meaning, and there are many rabbit holes to go down. As such, this post would be too long if I included each song as I did with Debut, Fearless, Speak Now, Red, and 1989. Pretty much every track on Reputation has queer content. There could probably be an argument made for LWYMMD and TIWWCHNT, especially the video and live performances, but neither really have lyrics conducive to this particular analysis. All the rest of the songs are included. Here are the links to each gay Reputation moment:

…Ready For it?

Golden age of Hollywood and bearding

Heterosexual marriage with frequent same sex interactions outside of the marriage

I didn’t include End Game because having features muddies the water about who contributed what. It’s probably Taylor being gay on main again, but I can’t rule out that Ed or Future added to the lyrics.

I Did Something Bad

Navigating LGBTQ Rumors

Media + Closeting

Don’t Blame Me

Internalized homophobia

LGBT have higher incidence of drug abuse and addiction

Delicate

Polyamory

So It Goes…

Femme invisibility

Gorgeous

To be her or be with her?

Gendered terms for beautiful


https://kit10phish.wordpress.com/2023/02/26/taylor-swifts-gay-moments-reputation

Getaway Car

No Strings Attached/Friends with Benefits but someone falls in love

King Of My Heart

The American Dream privileges (White, cis, middle to upper-class) Male Heterosexuals

https://kit10phish.wordpress.com/2023/02/27/taylor-swifts-gay-moments-reputation-3/(opens in a new tab)

Dancing With Our Hands Tied

Deep dive

https://kit10phish.wordpress.com/2023/03/04/taylor-swifts-gay-moments-reputation-dancing-with-our-hands-tied/(opens in a new tab)

Dress

The pronoun game

Pining and yearning

https://kit10phish.wordpress.com/2023/03/01/taylor-swifts-gay-moments-reputation-2/(opens in a new tab)

Call it What you Want

I didn’t do a whole thing on this one, because Karlie’s whole-a$$ name is repeated throughout the song–that’s pretty obviously sapphic.

But also, it’s about personal labels and internalized homophobia and anxiety.

New Year’s Day

Decision to come out in public or keep it on the down-low

https://kit10phish.wordpress.com/2023/02/28/taylor-swifts-gay-moments-reputation-new-years-day/(opens in a new tab)

Taylor Swift’s Gay Moments Crossover ~ Red (Oct 2012)

9 Feb

OK, Red starts getting a little tricky, because it becomes more muse-centric. I will make each muse their own post later, so these are the generally LGBTQ lyrics:

P.S. I’m intentionally showing my address bar as a lazy way of citing sources, it wasn’t just an off-center snip 😉

State of Grace:

And all we know is touch and go/We are alone with our changing minds/We fall in love ’til it hurts or bleeds, or fades in time/And I never (never)/Saw you coming/And I’ll never (never)/Be the same/You come around and the armor falls/Pierce the room like a cannonball…/…So you were never a saint/And I’ve loved in shades of wrong/We learn to live with the pain/Mosaic broken hearts/But this love is brave and wild…/…This is the worthwhile fight/Love is a ruthless game/Unless you play it good and right/These are the hands of fate

Red:

Loving him is like trying to change your mind/Once you’re already flying through the free fall…/…Regretting him was like wishing you never found out/That love could be that strong

Treacherous:

Put your lips close to mine/As long as they don’t touch…/…And I’d be smart to walk away/But you’re quicksand…/…This path is reckless/This slope is treacherous/And I, I, I like it/I can’t decide if it’s a choice/Getting swept away…/…And all we are is skin and bone/Trained to get along/Forever going with the flow/But you’re friction…/…That nothing safe is worth the drive…/…This hope is treacherous/This daydream is dangerous

I Knew You Were Trouble

‘Cause I knew you were trouble when you walked in/So shame on me now/Flew me to places I’d never been

All Too Well:

Autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place/And I can picture it after all these days/And I know it’s long gone and that magic’s not here no more/And I might be okay but I’m not fine at all…/…You told me ’bout your past thinking your future was me…/…But maybe this thing was a masterpiece ’til you tore it all up…/…And you call me up again just to break me like a promise/So casually cruel in the name of being honest/I’m a crumpled up piece of paper lying here…/…Time won’t fly, it’s like I’m paralyzed by it/I’d like to be my old self again/But I’m still trying to find it…/…After plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own…/…But you keep my old scarf from that very first week/’Cause it reminds you of innocence/And it smells like me/You can’t get rid of it

22:

Yeah, we’re happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time/It’s miserable and magical, oh yeah…/….Everything will be alright if you keep me next to you/You don’t know about me, but I’ll bet you want to…/…We ditched the whole scene/(It feels like one of those nights)/We won’t be sleeping/(It feels like one of those nights)/You look like bad news/I gotta have you

Holy Ground:

And for the first time I had something to lose…/…’Cause darling, it was good/Never looking down…/…But I don’t wanna dance/If I’m not dancing with you

https://www.elitedaily.com/dating/lesbian-tips-get-over-first-love/1724013

Sad Beautiful Tragic:

We had a beautiful magic love there/What a sad beautiful tragic love affair…/…And you’ve got your demons/And darlin’ they all look like me

The Lucky One:

Yeah, they’ll tell you now, you’re the lucky one/But can you tell me now you’re the lucky one?/….And your lover in the foyer doesn’t even know you/And your secrets end up splashed on the news front page/And they tell you that you’re lucky, but you’re so confused/’Cause you don’t feel pretty, you just feel used/And all the young things line up to take your place/Another name goes up in lights/You wonder if you’ll make it out alive…/…It was a few years later, I showed up here/And they still tell the legend of how you disappeared/How you took the money and your dignity and got the hell out…/…And it took some time, but I understand it now/’Cause now my name is up in lights/But I think you got it right

Everything has Changed:

Is I know something now/Know something now I didn’t before…/…I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now…/…And your eyes look like comin’ home…/…And everything has changed…/…You’ll be mine and I’ll be yours/All I know since yesterday/Is everything has changed…/…And all my walls/Stood tall painted blue/But I’ll take ’em down, take ’em down/And open up the door for you/And all I feel/In my stomach is butterflies/The beautiful kind, makin’ up for lost time/Takin’ flight…/…I’m feelin’ like I’ve missed you all this time…/…And let me know that it’s not all in my mind…/…So dust off your highest hopes/All I know is pouring rain/And everything has changed

Starlight:

And we were dancing, dancing/Like we’re made of starlight…/…We were seventeen and crazy running wild, wild…/…The night we snuck into a yacht club party/Pretending to be a duchess and a prince…/…He said, “Look at you, worrying so much about things you can’t change/You’ll spend your whole life singing the blues/If you keep thinking that way”/He was tryna to skip rocks on the ocean saying to me/”Don’t you see the starlight, starlight/Don’t you dream impossible things“…/…Ooh, ooh he’s talking crazy/Ooh, ooh dancing with me…/…Like we dream impossible dreams

Begin Again

Walked in expecting you’d be late/But you got here early and you stand and wave…/…You pull my chair out and help me in/And you don’t know how nice that is…/…I think it’s strange that you think I’m funny, ’cause/He never did…/…I’ve been spending the last eight months/Thinking all love ever does/Is break and burn, and end/But on a Wednesday in a cafe/I watched it begin again…/…And I almost brought him up/But you start to talk about the movies…/…And I want to talk about that/And for the first time/What’s past is past

The Moment I Knew

A million little shining stars had just aligned

Come Back, Be Here:

The delicate beginning rush/The feeling you can know so much/Without knowing anything at all/And now that I can put this down/If I had known what I’d known now…/…This is falling in love in the cruelest way

Taylor’s Gay Moments- Country Music ~ Speak Now (Oct 2010)

7 Feb

Taylor has always been Sapphic Lesbian w/major comp-het: I have interspersed Taylor’s early Myspace post and sus song lyrics:

Speak Now:

The entirety of:

Innocent

will get its own post.

Sparks Fly-

The way you move is like a full on rainstorm/And I’m a house of cards/You’re the kind of reckless that should send me running/And you stood there in front of me just/Close enough to touch/Close enough to hope you couldn’t see/What I was thinking of…/…Gimme something that’ll haunt me when you’re not around…/…My mind forgets to remind me you’re a bad idea/You touch me once and it’s really something/I’m on my guard for the rest of the world/But with you, I know it’s no good…/…Meet me in the pouring rain/Kiss me on the sidewalk/Take away the pain…/…I run my fingers through your hair/And watch the lights go wild…/…It’s just wrong enough to make it feel right/And lead me up the staircase/Won’t you whisper soft and slow/I’m captivated by you, baby/Like a fireworks show

Back to December-

And realized I loved you in the fall/And then the cold came, the dark days/When fear crept into my mind/You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye

Enchanted-

The lingering question kept me up/2 AM, who do you love?/I wonder ’til I’m wide awake/And now I’m pacing back and forth/Wishing you were at my door/I’d open up and you would say, “Hey”/It was enchanting to meet you…/…Please don’t be in love with someone else/Please don’t have somebody waiting on you

Better than Revenge-

Soon she’s gonna find/Stealing other people’s toys on the playground/Won’t make you many friends/She should keep in mind/She should keep in mind/There is nothing I do better than revenge, ha

At first glance, it may seem like men are more prone to competition than women. They can be more risk-tolerant and use more physical aggression toward each other. Their friendships are by and large transactional, and their conflicts are typically straightforward and direct. Women on the other hand often experience emotional depth and complexity in both friendship and competition. If they seem less competitive than men, it’s because they sometimes enact their rivalry drive in more covert and clandestine ways.

Last Kiss-

The words that you whispered for just us to know/You told me you loved me/So why did you go away?…/…I do recall now the smell of the rain…/…Sit on the floor wearing your clothes…/…I’m not much for dancing, but for you, I did/Because I love your handshake, meeting my father…/…You can plan for a change in the weather and time/But I never planned on you changing your mind

Long Live-

Long live the walls we crashed through/While the kingdom lights shined just for me and you/I was screaming, long live all the magic we made/And bring on all the pretenders, one day we will be remembered…/…Of all the years that we stood there on the sidelines/Wishing for right now…/…And the cynics were outraged/Screaming, this is absurd/’Cause for a moment a band of thieves/In ripped-up jeans got to rule the world…/…Long live all the mountains we moved/I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you…/…Promise me this/That you’ll stand by me forever/But if God forbid fate should step in/And force us into a goodbye…/…Long live the walls we crashed through/I had the time of my life with you…/…All the kingdom lights shined just for me and you

Mine-

Seems like there’s always someone who disapproves/They’ll judge it like they know about me and you/And the verdict comes from those with nothing else to do/The jury’s out, but my choice is you/So don’t you worry your pretty, little mind/People throw rocks at things that shine/And life makes love look hard/The stakes are high, the water’s rough/But this love is ours…/…You never know what people have up their sleeves/Ghosts from your past gonna jump out at me/Lurking in the shadows with their lip gloss smiles/But I don’t care ’cause right now you’re mine…/…And it’s not theirs to speculate/If it’s wrong, and your hands are tough/But they are where mine belong, and/I’ll fight their doubt and give you faith…/…But they can’t take what’s ours/They can’t take what’s ours

Taylor’s Gay Moments- Country Music ~ Fearless (Nov 2008)

6 Feb

Taylor has been alluding to her sexuality the whole time, we just weren’t paying attention. Given the lyrics I think she is Lesbian w/major comp-het: I have interspersed Taylor’s early Myspace post and sus song lyrics:

Fearless:

The entirety of:

Haunted

This song will get its own post.

Fearless-

Well you stood there with me in the doorway/My hands shake/I’m not usually this way but/You pull me in and I’m a little more brave/It’s the first kiss, it’s flawless, really something, it’s fearless/Cause I don’t know how it gets better than this/You take my hand and drag me head first/Fearless/And I don’t know why/But with you I’d dance in a storm/In my best dress/Fearless

Fifteen-

Feeling like there’s nothing to figure out…/…This is life before you know who you’re gonna be…/…When all you wanted/Was to be wanted/Wish you could go back/And tell yourself what you know now

Love Story-

So I sneak out to the garden to see you/We keep quiet, ’cause we’re dead if they knew…/…’Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter/And my daddy said, “Stay away from Juliet”…/….Romeo, save me, they’re tryna tell me how to feel/This love is difficult, but it’s real/Don’t be afraid, we’ll make it out of this mess…/…Is this in my head? I don’t know what to think

Hey Stephen-

Hey Stephen, I’ve been holding back this feeling/So I’ve got some things to say to you (ha)…/…But I never seen nobody shine the way you do/The way you walk, way you talk, way you say my name/It’s beautiful, wonderful, don’t you ever change/Hey Stephen, why are people always leaving?/I think you and I should stay the same…/…So come on and come out…/…And shine, shine, shine

You Belong with Me-

That what you’re looking for has been here the whole time/If you could see that I’m the one/Who understands you/Been here all along/So, why can’t you see?/You belong with me/Standing by and waiting at your backdoor/All this time how could you not know, baby?

The Way I Loved You-

He says everything I need to hear, and it’s like…/…I feel perfectly fine…/…He respects my space/And never makes me wait/And he calls exactly when he says he will/He’s close to my mother/Talks business with my father/He’s charming and endearing/And I’m comfortable…/…I couldn’t ask for anything better/He can’t see the smile I’m faking/And my heart’s not breaking/‘Cause I’m not feeling anything at all/And you were wild and crazy/Just so frustrating, intoxicating, complicated/Got away by some mistake and now/I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain/It’s 2 a.m. and I’m cursing your name/I’m so in love that I acted insane/And that’s the way I loved you/Breaking down and coming undone/It’s a roller coaster kind of rush/And I never knew I could feel that much/And that’s the way I loved you

Untouchable-

Untouchable like a distant diamond sky/I’m reaching out and I just can’t tell you why/I’m caught up in you…/…Untouchable, burning brighter than the sun/And when you’re close, I feel like coming undone

Forever and Always-

Was I out of line?/Did I say something way too honest, made you run and hide…/…Thought I knew you for a minute, now I’m not so sure…/…Here’s to silence, that cuts me to the core/Where is this going?/Thought I knew for a minute, but I don’t anymore

I said, “Leave“, but all I really want is you/To stand outside my window, throwin’ pebbles/Screamin’, “I’m in love with you”…/…And don’t you leave, ’cause I know/All I need is on the other side of the door/Me and my stupid pride are sittin’ here alone…/…I keep goin’ back over things we both said/And I remember the slamming door/And all the things that I misread/Oh, babe, if you know everything/Tell me why you couldn’t see/When I left, I wanted you to chase after me, yeah/I said, “Leave”, but all I really want is you…/…And the conversation with the little white lies…/…And I broke down crying, was she worth this mess?/After everything and that little black dress/After everything I must confess, I need you

Today was a Fairytale-

All that I can say/Is now it’s getting so much clearer/Nothing made sense ’til the time I saw your face/Today was a fairytale

You All Over Me-

I lived, and I learned/And found out what it was to turn around/And see, that we/Were never really meant to be/So I lied, and I cried/And I watched a part of myself die/’Cause no amount of freedom gets you clean

Taylor’s Gay Moments- Country Music ~Debut (Oct 2006)

5 Feb

Taylor has been Sapphic Lesbian w/major comp-het the whole time. We just didn’t notice it. I have taken some telling lyrics to show the signs have always been there. I’ll let Taylor speak for herself:

Self-Titled (2006):

The Outside-

I didn’t know what I would find/When I went lookin’ for a reason/I know I didn’t read between the lines/And baby I’ve got nowhere to go/I tried to take the road less traveled by/But nothing seems to work the first few times, am I right?/So, how can I ever try to be better?/Nobody ever let’s me in…/…On the outside looking in/I’ve been a lot of lonely places

Tied Together with a Smile-

Hold on, baby; you’re losing it/The water’s high, you’re jumping into it/And letting go, and no one knows/That you cry; but you don’t tell anyone/That you might not be the golden one/And you’re tied together with a smile/But you’re coming undone/I guess it’s true that love was all you wanted

A Perfectly Good Heart-

Maybe I should’ve seen the signs, should’ve read the writing on the wall/And realized by the distance in your eyes that I would be the one to fall/No matter what you say I still can’t believe/That you would walk away/Why would you wanna take our love and tear it all apart now/Why would you wanna make the very first scar/Why would you wanna break a perfectly good heart/It’s not unbroken anymore/How do I get it back the way it was before

Invisible-

This is wrong, but I can’t help but feel like/There ain’t nothing more right, babe…/…I knew from the first note played/I’d be breaking all my rules to see you…/…I’m invisible and everyone knows who you are

Keeping Score is Losing (even if you’re morally superior)

27 Jan

Letter to the Past-

I think this song pairs well with the story in the first song. The narrator [Brandi?] says it’s [love? life?] is a game. And admits the partner is right. BUT even so, nobody is winning when everyone is negative and holding grudges.

In this song, our troubled main character puts it all out there. Brandi sings she is usually losing, but wins sometimes. Our narrator asks her lover to look at the bigger picture, open up their mind and also be more authentic instead of always trying to show a tough face. Because loving someone while keeping score is still kind of losing, even if you’re morally right. We all die one day, and nobody looks at the score. So the narrator asks the partner to stop trying to keep score, as it’s actually hurting themself in the end, they are becoming fatigued and sore.

This song is beautiful, with soulful singing and lots of emotion.

The chorus really bothers me though! The following comparison, in my opinion, is bad writing: The narrator is saying the partner is like a Stone wall (intentional call-back to start of gay-movement location? but stable, grounded, always there, strong). But it’s not a good comparison to rubber-bands (flexible? Stretched too thin?). It’s just two random objects being compared. I think the writing could have been better.

Anyway, the last line, “you’re built to last” I’m almost certain that’s the slogan of a car manufacturer-Ford? I cannot take the song seriously when it ends in a commercial jingle!

This song is not my favorite, but continues to peek into this couple’s psyche to see what is wrong, why they got there, and if there is a desire on both parts to repair it.

Brandi Carlile’s Broken Horses-My Take

25 Jan

Broken Horses-

Is the best singing on the album. Brandi told Rolling Stone podcast that she didn’t want to look like she was just singing so strongly like this to show off. I say, there should be MORE belting the eff out. And less apologizing for showcasing talent. Show. the fuck. off, Brandi! Jesus the scream-note. Because I love the singing so much and think this is the best song (vocally) on this album, and towards the top in her catalogue, I honestly didn’t attend to the lyrics for the first 100 listens.

Wearing something inside your skin is quite the imagery. Brandi is telling us that leather (tough, of-nature, yet soft, versatile) was passed down from her father to her. And it’s not just something she can take off–the leather inside the skin is deeply ingrained. I don’t know who “you” is in this song. I don’t think it’s the partner referenced in the prior songs. Brandi insinuates this person somehow attacks her. I think the Sunday best means someone in a church, or someone really phony who uses their dress and manner to hide their sinister intentions. Telling that person they had better call their priest shows me maybe it’s someone in the congregation (from her denied-Baptism story?) telling Brandi she doesn’t belong?

Brandi says she has also worn the jester’s bells (funny, silly, clownish, naïve?). And she worshiped at the alter of a puppet-master. I think this means a religious leader had an expectation their congregation would be mindless and under his(?) total control without thought or push-back. Then, Brandi compares religion to a play or show. She says, being a puppet for an authoritarian minister was not fulfilling. Brandi blames this minister for a more superficial, experience. When under this preacher’s guidance, she held back her true words, and the result of that was her children are in the cheap seats (far back, more distractions, not as good, worse) and got a worse big event (religious understanding or experience, going back to reality).

I feel like the book would enlighten me to the meaning of the chorus. [Right now Cool is reading it, while I finish a book I had already started. I’ll read Brandi’s when she’s done]. But Cool did tell me Brandi said she’s not talking about “breaking” a horse to ride here. Tethered in open spaces is feeling tied down, being restrained but seeing huge possibility. If you’re spiritually restrained or holding back your true self in a big, wide world would feel smothering. The horse and the subdued person would both want to escape, run free, be more authentic to their nature.

Right into the barrel of a gun. I’m not sure where the gun comes from . Is someone aggressing? Is it suicide ideology? This could mean, when the person holds back so much that they are missing out that they don’t want to continue on that way. Because life lived in a closed way, isn’t even worth living? Or they’re so frustrated, yet trapped and they don’t know how to gain freedom? Or it could be the cowboy (or captor, person making them feel so trapped) that holds the gun to keep the horse/person within their control. If they escape, run, open up–they will be punished.

Mending up YOUR fences with MY horses runnin’ wild seems like some sort of compromise. Brandi says her inner self is running wild (the horses are untied and galloping through the field) but she’s careful too. She’s fixing the break in the fence that allowed that momentary freedom. She is reigning it back in, checking herself. Brandi helps keep herself tethered by fixing the fence that traps her and makes her so unhappy. Now, it’s not just the person with the gun keeping her (emotions) tied up and hidden, it’s Brandi (the horses) herself capitulating.

The 3rd verse reinforces this. Brandi says she treaded softly (walked on eggshells, tried to “behave”) to get this other person’s praise. This other person doesn’t like Brandi as she is, they want her to be less wild. As such Brandi doesn’t shout loudly or stomp or act out–she whispers through tears and begs sweetly. At the end, Brandi says, enough with this shit, it’s not me. I’m not going to reign it in and be tethered to please you any longer. She says she allowed this for a long time, but it’s not what she wants for her children. She tells this “you” enough.

Like I said, not having read the book, I think I’m at a bit of a disadvantage to analyze the song. But I get the impression “you” isn’t the same you as the romantic partner in the prior songs on the album. I think this may relate to the story I’ve heard Brandi tell in concert, and in many interviews about the pastor who wouldn’t baptize her. That traumatized her and she’s saying she played along and acted “good” for long enough. She wants to be more her authentic self, despite criticism from the church.

2022 Music Statistics

21 Jan

Unfortunately for statistical accuracy, I used a pad for over half the year, and it was a shared device so it wasn’t under my username. Then my phone died and I had to switch to an older phone. So this is not accurate at all, but it fits the vibe of 2022 (ruined) so I’m posting it so I can look back at it in the future.

Most popular artists this year (on this device and username):

Taylor Swift led this year, followed by MY MATE ManiK Fox. Check out her music on Spotify or Apple–I think it’s on all the platforms. ManiK Fox. After that was Kelly Clarkson and Brandi with their pipes. Young the Giant was 5th on this device, feisty Miranda Lambert 6th, and album of the year winner, Amy Ray 7th on this device:

Most listened to albums (on this device):

Popular Songs:

I really hope Katie Pruitt puts out some more music soon, I was enjoying listening to her a lot after we discovered her at Brandi’s concert. You can tell the stats are skewed because a lot of Christmas music is showing up even though I really don’t listen to it much, and never outside of December.

Question… Taylor Keeps Repeating the Same Old Pattern that Ultimately Makes her Miserable [Part 14]

12 Dec

Taylor wins the pronoun game.  I’m not even going to try to untangle the speaker/recipient/changing characters in this song.  It was written so convoluted that I haven’t even seen a satisfactory answer to this yet.  Instead, I took lyric snippets from other songs featuring the same word, to get a feeling about Taylor’s sentiment and even subject. Don’t get overwhelmed with the length of this post.  The word I’m trying to point-out from Question… lyrics is highlighted. 

I was going along the lyrics of Question… in the order Taylor wrote them. But I have one small piece that fits best with this entry, but if I put it at the end, it ruins the flow. So just here I’m going to mix the Question… lyrics to make my analysis have the arc I want it to.

Can I ask you a question?

Did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room?

And every single one of your friends was making fun of you

Make fun:

Gorgeous

We already know from Enchanted that Taylor enjoys conversation and banter, and I’d bet that this making fun of the way someone talks is part of that. Taylor is enamored with this cool, Gorgeous person in the song. And she’s magnetized to the (gal. We’re going with female because I don’t think guys are really called gorgeous) despite Taylor’s “boyfriend” that she doesn’t care what he’s doing.

I just may like to have a conversation

Conversation:

Enchanted

stay beautiful

holy ground

end game

other side of the door

sad, beautiful, tragic

I think it’s safe to say that one of, if not the primary, love languages for Taylor is communication.  And it makes sense since she’s obviously a lover of words.  These songs convey how witty repartee is a necessary part of wooing Taylor Swift.  Enchanted mentions a physical attraction, but the banter is what really gets Taylor going.  She thinks about this person all the way home and wonders if they’re single, or if they even date women (“who do you love?”).  Taylor reiterates communication is key in Stay Beautiful, where talking to this person is the highlight of Taylor’s day.  It makes her nervous, and even though this person takes her breath away she finds it difficult to talk.  

Holy Ground tells about a mutual understanding between two people.  There is an unspoken familiarity that helps each individual put everything else aside to enjoy being unexpectedly captivated. They don’t require banter, because they are already close from the beginning.  And it’s the first time Taylor feels love (vs. comp-het).  She has something to lose because she actually has real feelings.

But, but, but Taylor’s career and people’s perception of her is never far from her mind.  Even when she’s swept away by the strongest desires for women, she is still worried about judgment.  End Game describes how the body is gold, the eyes make her drunk on love, and this person has captured her very soul.  But at the same time Taylor can’t forget all the drama and how her reputation suffered.  Taylor knows if she dated a woman it would be a big conversation, and a lot of negative reactions.

The pain of closeting and not pursuing the one you love out of fear of social rejection is spelled out in On the Other Side of the Door.  Taylor tells white lies to protect herself from being outed.  But as will be the case throughout her love life, those lies break down the relationship.  Taylor needs this person in the little black dress, but pushes her away out of self-preservation and fear.  And when the gal actually leaves instead of throwing pebbles at Taylor’s window, Taylor cries.  Her early romances ended nearly the same as her current romance has ended.  Taylor loves, but in secret.  The partner doesn’t like the pain of being in the closet.  Taylor fears for her image and how that might hurt her career, so she pushes her lover away, despite wanting to hold onto them.  Then, Taylor is left alone and sad. 

It’s a pattern Taylor has repeated over and over, and Question… is a song about that habitual reaction to fear of being outed.