Tag Archives: business

Question… Can the Ultra-Famous have Reeaal Friends? [Part 5]

27 Nov

Taylor wins the pronoun game.  I’m not even going to try to untangle the speaker/recipient/changing characters in this song.  It was written so convoluted that I haven’t even seen a satisfactory answer to this yet.  Instead, I took lyric snippets from other songs featuring the same word, to get a feeling about Taylor’s sentiment and even the song’s subject(s). Don’t get overwhelmed with the length of this post.  The word I’m trying to point-out from Question… lyrics is highlighted.  

Miss Americana showed me that Taylor is pretty isolated, and lonely much of the time. In the documentary I came away with the impression that the people around Taylor are mostly superficial. Brendan was distracted, for instance. Abigale is still Taylor’s friend, but things were stilted. They are in different places in life. Abigale has a family and Taylor’s super-fame is not relatable. They had little to talk about. Tree, Taylor’s publicist seemed like the most genuine, interested person, but she’s on the pay-role. The other people on Taylor’s team seemed harsh and judgmental. Their focus was the brand making money, not Taylor the person who has actual thoughts and feelings. Taylor’s love interest was seldom shown. It was weirdly secret, and when Taylor won her Grammy’s she had nobody to share her happy moment with. Taylor’s mom was the only person that was there for Taylor, the person. And I think Taylor’s super-celebrity status makes her alone in the world. Her idea of friends conveys this:

And every single one of your friends was making fun of you

Friends:

Dorothea

blank space

You need to calm down

paper rings

london boy

Lover

champagne problems

tis the damn season

the last great American dynasty

Archer

This is why we can’t have nice things

Closure

Taylor talks about 5 categories of friends, with many people overlapping in the categories over time.  There are famous friends, other queers, peripheral friends, betrayers, and a friend who became her lover.

There are strategic friends.  “You got shiny friends since you left town.” The friends are new, dazzling, and elevate status.  What Dorthea does not say is that the friends have a lot in common, are good listeners, or loyal.  I get the impression from the passing remarks that these relationships could be superficial or to be in a certain scene.   The friendships are for publicity, to get in a door, or just thrust together because they are in the same business.  In the highly satirical song, Blank Space, she casually says “let’s be friends.”  There is nothing real or authentic about it.  It’s not a friendship based on trust or mutual interests, it’s mutually beneficial.  Taylor is describing entering into a contract for the benefit of the media and general public, not a genuine connection.  

Then there are other queers.  Taylor feels their commonalities.  They are physically around where she lives, and in the industry.  They share similar experiences and struggles.  Though Welcome to New York doesn’t specifically say “friends” it has a similar tone to the rest of these songs.  

Welcome to New York

These people escaped their small towns and the homophobia so rife in them.  Many of them were estranged from family and had no one when they came to New York looking for a better life.  They put that angst, and the pain of being bullied for being gay, away and lived more authentically.  These people came together, and are coexisting in the same space, but Taylor doesn’t mention being especially close to any of them.  She is doing her own thing, and they are going about their business too.  They nervously and excitedly walk through the village realizing there are people like them.  They search for love–a unique experience given their childhood isolation and trauma.  And Taylor is right there with them, feeling the difference in acceptance between Nashville and New York.  In You Need to Calm Down, these friends are explicitly named as part of the queer community.  The homophobes are comin’ at them like a missile.  And Taylor is on the inside of the gay trailor-park, the same as the queer friends.  Though she isn’t close to any one person in this community, she gets it.  Taylor is one of the queers.

There are other people that are around during the important relationship.  In a lot of the songs, friends are relegated to the background, while Taylor and her Lover are centered in the lyrics.  In Paper Rings the friends were high the first night they met.  It’s like Taylor barely notices the friends because her love “blurs her periphery”-they are just inebriated people that can crash in the living room.  The friends are just there in songs like London Boy.  Champagne problems reiterate that the friends are fickle, not evergreen.  If something goes wrong, the friends aren’t there cheering.  Much like this song, Question…

The fourth category are betrayers.  I get major frenemies vibes from most of these songs, actually.  In Tis the Damn Season Taylor talks about so-called friends just there to gossip.  Last Great American Dynasty uses bitch-pack, a moniker that may be a bit sarcastic, but isn’t a super-nice way to describe actual friends.  The Archer says all her enemies started out as friends.  In This is Why we Can’t Have Nice Things, Taylor reminds the audience that she isn’t that great at picking out authentic friends.  She aligned with people who later turned on her, and threw her under the bus.  She makes a point to toast her real friends, but in the same breath mentions the people she can actually depend on-her mama and her baby(lover).  

Finally, there is Karlie.  Her lover and her went from friends to this.  She keeps writing pages about their epic love story.  And after the final break-up being friends again would iron it out so nice.  But Taylor doesn’t want that.

ADA for Sneakers?!

15 Sep

Dress codes are stupid.  Especially when the job is not customer-facing in any way.  Like, who cares what people wear as long as it’s not showing body parts that are unacceptable for work?!  But Companies still persist in trying to micromanage employees.  Also, dress shoes legit hurt my feet and slow me down.  So I wrote a letter to leadership at my corporation.  It was persuasion to just go ahead and change the dress code because it’s unnecessary:

My purpose is to respectfully persuade you that daily sneakers should be allowed in the dress code.
We are not client facing so sneakers won’t be an issue.  Our professionalism, productivity, and quality will be the same if we can wear sneakers.  If anything my shoes have been the conversation point that brings joy to both me and the people I work with.
Sneakers offer support and comfort.  Which is important to me.  I have genetic bunions that press shoes and become sore and sharp ankle bones sure to tear blisters.  Also, participating in competitive dance For 11 years of my childhood has impacted my feet making them Crack and pop and leaving my arches tender.  Cheerlesding with its explosive jumps (and the resulting high impact landing) and the twisting stunts over 5 feet above the ground left lifelong ankle problems.  And 4 years of pole vaulting and struggling to complete my turn resulting in landing my full body weight from heights above 7 feet have left my ankles stiff and sore In adulthood.  Sneakers provide that supports and comfort to feet and ankles that have known better days.
I seldom speak at work because of anxiety and introversion, but I do express myself through my outfits which I plan a month ahead.  And shoes are perhaps the most important part of the outfit- matching and tieing the look together.  I honor holidays, events, and themes using my attire and thats what makes me who I am.  95% of my shoes are sneakers for the afore- mentioned comfort.  I just bought a slew of pants to meet dress code now I’m reluctant to buy all new shoes when I already have ——— pairs of perfectly good fashion sneakers.
I implore you to please take this earnest letter into consideration and change the dress code to allow for daily sneakers.  They mean a lot to me.
I don’t know why, but I expected a human response to this sincere letter.  I should have known better.  I got the “corporate treatment” instead.  You know, where they copy and paste the rule they wrote and email it to you (again) informing you of the rule.  Which I already knew, and that’s why I was writing?!  Like, change the rule, b/c we don’t need it-is what I was asking…  Alas, I was just given this rule and told if I had a problem I’d need to register a disability.  Which seems very, very heavy-handed.  But I went through the paperwork and the motions and the doctor’s appointment, not expecting much.  And to my surprise, I was granted disability status.  But should it have gone that far?  I don’t think so, just let us wear shoes, ffs.  Below is some of the things I had to put in my fancy government papers:

 

musculoskeletal:

bunions

plantar fascietis

weak ankles

 

Problems:

alignment (especially compensating for unsupportive footwear)

balance

concentration

decreased stamina

fatigue in feet and ankles

muscle weakness

reduced motion in the ankles

sitting (exacerbates pain and stiffness later)

standing

stiffness in feet and ankles (exacerbated after sitting).

walking

 

Prevent worsening of conditions and reduce further problems by wearing more supportive footwear.

 

Need a wide toe-bed.

need support for plantar fasciitis.

need more support for weak ankles.

 

Oh the joys of Corporate America!