Tag Archives: celebrities

This is Me Trying: Analysis of Taylor Swift’s folklore (from larger post)

25 Aug

This is a more digestible portion of my album analysis:


Here, I have tried to analyze what and who each track of Folklore is about.  Which is complex because it’s not in a linear order.  Names are obscured.  Facts may be reality or story.  The narrator is unreliable.  And this whole thing is going to be from a Kaylor perspective, because that’s how the songs, and Taylor Swifts catalog as a whole makes the best sense to me.  I’ll show you what I mean.


9. This is Me Trying.

Takes place after “The Archer.” In that one it goes, “Combat, I’m ready for combat” like she’s ready for a fight.  This will not be easy.  She continues, “I say I don’t want that, but what if I do?” This speaks of hesitation.  Taylor fears this announcement.  But also, she wants it.  She’s preparing.  The next line is, “Cause cruelty wins in the movies.” And I think that is telling how every gay movie ends badly.  The queers don’t get that happy ending, just sadness and tragedy.  The last line in this verse:  “I’ve got a hundred thrown-out speeches I almost said to you.”  And she means the fans.  The public.  Taylor Swift is afraid, but wants to come out.  She had many false starts, but she continues to head in the direction.  Think about the Archer’s line, “Help me hold onto you.” and when Taylor sings this song at concerts and says who could leave me, who could stay, you could stay.” And she points at the crowd on the YOU could stay.  This confirms The Archer is addressing the fans.

In this part B of that song, she sings, “I don’t quite know what to say, but I’m here in your doorway.” Taylor is taking to us, her fans. Proof?  “Pouring my heart out to a stranger.” She speaks of trying to come out, but also keep her career. “They told me all of my cages are mental.” It won’t be as scary as she has always feared.  Taylor just has to get out of her head–out of her own way.  She talks about lashing out in past songs. “And my words shoot to kill when I’m mad, I have a lot of regrets about that.”  She’s saying two things here:  1) In telling these stories about break ups with boys, and in laying down Easter eggs as encouragement to analyze her artwork, Taylor has created a monster.  She did it out of fear and anger, but now fans eagerly comb through her songs looking for the real people they might be about.  So now, that she wants to present the more authentic version of herself, it seems like she was disingenuous before.  Which wasn’t her intention.  She is reminding the fans about how much she cares about what we think about her.  2) I think she wants to come out carefully so as not to hurt or anger anyone else, especially anyone who was previously or who is currently in her personal life.

Updated Attractive (Male) Celebrities

4 Sep

The Gorge masterpost is coming up, but I want to do it justice, so today I’m going with another draft.  When I get more free time, I’ll finish the story.  But for now–Here’s the newest version of my (male) hottie list.  As a lesbian, it’s difficult to pick, this is not some sex-sexy list!  But I do have eyes so I do notice some things.  I like a friendly face, good hair, nice smile, a well-cared-for body = muscles, and good style.  Some of these dudes look better in movies or in motion, but some are captured well in pics.  Anyway, here’s a list of a few good men:

My ex-boyfriend Paul Walker is removed from the list.  I didn’t know he was a gross pedo-type.  He groomed and preyed upon his 2nd young wife, and that makes him *yuck* no matter how pretty the face.  Don’t look too hard at the people you like if you don’t wanna be disappointed.

Annnnnd Replacing the number one spot:  A tie

Scott Brothers 4 Scott Brothers 5 Scott Brothers 6 Scott Brothers 8 Scott Brothers 9

The Property Brothers, twins Johnathan and Drew Scott.  They are model-handsome and it conveys on their HGTV show AND in pics–which rarely occurs.  They’re rugged, stylish, funny, and did I mention handsome?  We love their show on TV and can’t get enough eye-candy.

Sccott Brothers 7

Scott Brothers 1 Scott Brothers 2

Scott Brothers 3

Mark Wahlburg–Used to be #2.  But ruined it by perpetrating TWO hate crimes that I didn’t know about before.  He’s off the list-because that is ugly.

Scott Eastwood- He’s got that pretty face, but also a ruggedness.  He’s a good dresser. And the abs don’t hurt my feelings.










Harry Connick Jr-

he looks NICE.  Like he’s a nice, friendly person, approachable.

He also gets points for style

and muscle.

Harry Connick Jr--fancyHarry Connick Jr--pin stripesHarry Connick Jr--suit

LL Cool J

Great skin!

Awesome muscles

good smile

LL Cool J--muscles

LL Cool J--smile

LL Cool J--stylin

Boris Kudjoe–

points for style, nice smile, and obviously muscles galore

(he may actually be at the top of my list, now that I see the pics).

Boris--suitBoris--absBoris Kudjoe--face

young, clean-cut, pre-cheating Brad Pitt

Brad Pitt--blondeBrad Pitt--light stubble

Matthew McConahay

before he lost a bunch of weight that made him look weird and old?

He has style (when he’s dressed) and nice muscles and a friendly face.  Also, take a lesson people, and don’t smoke TOO much weed.  Because it makes you feel super-clever, and you drone on and on too long.  And maybe even get so arrogant as to run for political office despite having zero experience or knowledge.  STOP IT.

Matthew McConahay--Magic MikeMatthew M 3

Ryan Reynolds–blondie, tousled hair, boyish face and good abs.  Plus, he just looks like a nice dude–and he’s funny.

Ryan Reynolds--open shirtRyan Reynolds--toussled hair


good dresser


beautiful, clear skin

Jeremih--nice suitJeremih-luminescent skin

Robbin’ His Family

12 Aug

Of course I loved Robin Williams–I’m human, aren’t I?  Just like everyone else bemoaning his death on Facebook, I grew up watching him.  Through his work, I feel like I know him.  He seemed accessible and friendly and he is one of the great talents of this age.  I grew up with his kid-friendly movies.  I love his HBO special and have watched it about a hundred times.  And I even like his dramatic roles.

I’m torn though.  I have a hard time just writing about his good work.  I can’t bring myself to post a colorance on Facebook, because I’m also angry at his selfishness.  I feel Robin Williams is a coward for committing suicide.  At 63 years old, he should have had a lot of life lift.  It’s senseless.  Especially when he has a family who will bare the brunt of his decision and be left to deal with everything without him.

I realize depression is serious.  Having a bipolar mate, I do not take depression lightly.  At the same time I cannot condone making a permanent decision for a temporary problem.  I wish he would have waited a little longer for the help he needed, meds to kick in, life to calm down–whatever needed to happen.  Because you CAN come out of a depression–you can’t un-do asphyxiation.

But I feel sad for the pain Robin Williams felt, and angry he didn’t feel there was any other recourse.  He was loved by many, and I wish he would have trusted them to step up and help in his time of need.  Alas, I wish his family the best, and hope they are able to adjust to life without him.  He was a great entertainer and his humor will be missed.

Janeane Garofalo

21 Aug

I liked her dry humor and sarcasm when she was popular.  Where did she go, anyway? Did she retire, stop getting hired, settle down, move?  I always wonder. . .  She was all over the screen in the 1990s, and now you hardly hear from her.

When I did hear from her, she was doing some Seattle comedy TV special. And she tried to tell the audience that she was A-sexual. Meaning she doesn’t have sex with anyone.  Which is fine.  It’s a thing, I guess.  Though I have to wonder why.  But if you don’t wanna have relationships or sex your entire life–have at it.  Or don’t, I guess.  Except, in Garofalo’s case, I don’t buy it. She’s a total lesbian!  Total.  I think the only reason she claims/thinks she’s A-sexual is that her family is staunch Catholic. And gay and Catholic don’t mix well in most cases. At the very least, combining both is very, very difficult.  So I think rather then take the hard road, she gave up love and sex all-together.

Or maybe that’s just what she says to escape conflict and she’s secretly shaking up with a woman somewhere. . .

On the same track, why do celebrities/people say, “My sexuality is nobody’s business” ???  True, explicit details of sex lives are not all that relevant to the public–this holds true for everyone.  But sexuality has to be actively hidden.  The person in question has to mindfully avoid pronouns, secretively date/live, and be constantly careful.  It’s more then just protecting your personal business, it is (internally) homophobic to try to keep such a big piece of life on the D.L.

It would be akin to a Jewish person saying their religion is nobody’s business then actively trying to hide it and not acknowledge their religion/heritage.  I think people say their sexuality is nobody’s business are really saying that it is nobody’s right to judge such a personal, important, pervasive, and unchangeable part of themselves.  Because, sure, it’s nobody’s business, but it does come up naturally.

Possible internal homophobia and +/- closeted behavior aside, I can really get behind a person who says:  “I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.”  Quote courtesy of Wiki.

Critique of “Unbearable Lightness”

12 Feb

I didn’t want to like this book.  I did not really know anything about Portia De Rossi (PdR) except she came out of seemingly nowhere to become Ellen Degeneres’ wife, then upon looking her up on Google, seeing she had played a few bit roles as a sorostitute-type.  I knew nothing else.  When I found out PdR had been on “Allie McBeal” and that she was one of the actresses with an evident, yet unacknowledged eating-disorder, I felt disdain for her.  That show, with it’s unattainable images of what a women is supposed to look like, did a lot of damage to impressionable females.  But many times, I’ll watch a documentary or read a biography of someone not very likeable and come away with understanding, sympathy, and sometimes even a changed opinion about them.  So I bought the book and gave PdR a chance to redeem herself.

Details are given about how PdR loses and maintains her low weight. This is problematic because it gives women ideas of how to diet, starve, binge, and purge. Also, the details devulged are talked about as if they’re completely normal line of thought and activity. There is no sense that what PdR is disordered, which normalizes the events to the reader.

This book made me disappointed in L’Oreal.  Throughout the book (through the lens of anorexia) they are seen as uncaring, unsympathetic, and uncompromising of the type of women they portray.  The company made PdR feel fat and ugly and immoral, with its horrible fitting of small gray dresses, it’s fancy meetings at the Four Seasons, and the morality clause in the contract.  PdR showed that despite their slogan of “I’m worth it” they are implicitly sending the message that only a narrow category of women (slim and straight to start with) actually ARE worth it.

I thought the L’Oreal stuff in the book should have been accompanied by details about “Allie McBeal’s” culture of eating disorders or left out all-together.  L’Oreal was villanized (rightly so it sounds like) while the issue of competition between actresses was carefully skirted.  PdR is VERY careful not to mention the other celebrities on the set with evident eating disorders that must have furthered her own eating issues.  If L’Oreal is fair game, why shouldn’t Callista Flockhart get mention?

I absolutely loved that with the doctor’s bad news of all the internal damage done by starving, pictures were shown of what she looked like at the time.  It sent the implicit message that though Hollywood, and the world at large demanded thinness, and it may be misconstrued as beautiful, it came with consequences.  It was very dramatic.  My favorite part of the book by far.

Somehow more weight (pun intended) was given to Ellen Degeneres, who barely appears in the book, then to PdR’s sexuality, though the homosexuality is said to be the root of the problem.  The fear of exposure, repression, desire of women, and her mom’s “acceptance” of her were only briefly mentioned.  I think she could have done more with those themes.  Yes, the book’s focus was the eating disorder, but I thought the lesbianism should have been dramatized more.

And I did not like the “Ellen saved my life” stuff.  Firstly, PdR doesn’t give herself credit for her recovery at all.  Can it be called recovery then?  It makes me wonder how far she’s actually come.  PdR thought of Ellen as some sort of hero throughout the book–from the time she was young.  I don’t really think their relationship could be balanced or equal because of that. Reading other reviews of the book, or even descriptions, I noticed how Ellen is mentioned in all of them.  Though she didn’t even know PdR during her seriously disordered eating phase, and really isn’t IN the book.  PdR will forever just be Ellen’s wife and submissive/passive/arm-candy.  Her third name-change says it all.  First PdR changed her name for Hollywood and this book details the fall-out of her trying to adhere to Hollywood’s idealized images of beauty.  Now she has changed her name for her wife.  Doesn’t this women know who SHE wants to be?  The end of the book just shows how the situation for PdR’s self-esteem hasn’t changed–just the focus.

And of course, I absolutely did NOT like how PdR ignorantly berates the dairy and meat industries at the end of the book.  She uses PETA-type jargon as if it’s the factual truth, saying that farm animals are treated inhumanely, and not healthy for human consumption anyway.  I wish celebrities would keep their mouths shut if they can’t share actual information.  It was an aside that wasn’t needed and was very judgmental in its pro-animal rights stance.  How hypocritical for a heavy smoker to be disdainful of the ill-effects of milk and meat!  Smoking and how she wanted to do it all the time, or was taking drags everywhere, is a large component of the book.  The restrictive diet actually reveals how she must still struggle with her food, too.  It takes a lot of discipline and effort to cut out entire food groups from your diet as she currently is being vegan(?)/vegetarian (?).

Though I had some problems with the book, and still don’t really like PdR, it WAS a riviting read.  I only half believe PdR wrote the book by herself, because the image she has cultivated for herself (or that the media has cultivated for her) is not observant, smart, wry, or perfectionist.  The language in the book was so advanced and varied–I was impressed!  Either way, I found myself putting aside my homework and tearing through the prose in just 3 days–while working nine hour days and attending class.  Well done, on such a page-turner.


ANTM: Guilty Pleasure

3 Feb

I like the creative side of the show.  It’s amazing to me that someone could come up with so many diverse concepts for photo-shoots.  And of course, the pervy-er side of me likes to look at the pictures.  These are attractive girls.  I say girls, not to disrespect, but because “old” for models is 17.  That’s the truth.  And the industry is looking for younger and younger blood (12 years?!) to chew up and spit out.

What I don’t like about the show is Tyra.  Yeah, I said it.  I find her obnoxious and self-congratulatory.  Could her picture be featured MORE?  And I hate her fag-hag gossipy-banter.  I’m like “Shut up, fat-ass and get back to the pictures!”  And you just know Tyra in all those years of being a model and stressing how she just loved Southern home-cooked food was lying, lying, lying!  I guess she never mentioned portion size of those “bad” foods.  Apparently not much, because she is a cow now that she’s no longer a model.  But it doesn’t stop her from wearing inappropriate model-esk clothes and parading about in front of the camera.

The other thing I don’t love about the show is how catty the girls can be to each other sometimes.  It isn’t constant, but there is definitely some drama portrayed that I don’t love.  To miss those bad, I find myself skipping the show and just looking at the resulting pictures online.  And there are thousands!  Note to ANTM web-designer:  There are SO many repeats.  It’s annoying.  And there’s no main list where you can chose one season and the title of the episode.  You have to start at the most recent show and click “next,” “next,” “next.”  It’s tedious.  But I did it.  I went though about 2,000 + pictures.

Of course, I didn’t really love concepts such as blood bath, women bound in rope, or statues for feminist reasons.  I try not to think how the ladies are constantly objectified and dehumanized as models.  I suppose it’s not enough just to try to not to think about it.  I should take a stand and DO something.  But what can you do to avoid an entire beauty/weight-loss/fashion industry?  It’s all-encompassing and pervasive.  Any ideas, my feminist friends?


Allie McBeal Does a Disservice to Women

30 Jan

I watched the show Allie McBeal for the first time.  I was horrified.  I couldn’t pay attention to the jokes, the acting, the dialogue, the plot, or anything else.  I could only see emaciated skeletons that were supposed to serve as role models on a show geared toward women.  The problem was so evident and so dramatic that I was disgusted.

It’s one thing so have a problem.  It’s quite another to pretend that your weight is normal as are your eating habits.  To pretend it’s no big deal is harmful.  Calista Flockhart leads the eating disorders (and the denial) going as low as under 98 lb at 5’5″. Portia was down to 85 lb during the show. Courtney Thorne-Smith also struggled with an evident eating disorder during the show.  At the time, they either vehently denied having disordered eating and low weights, or remained tight-lipped about it.

They all admit their problems now.  Some more half-heartedly then others (Calista, I’m talking to you).  But what good does that do to millions of viewers influenced by the show in the 1990s when the cast vehemently denied having anorexia, bulemia, and the like?  How many girls watched that television show and felt bad about their own bodies?  How many began nursing their own eating disorders as a result?

I can’t watch the show, and wouldn’t want to anyway.  I won’t knowingly support such a bad example to women and body size.

Is He EVERYone’s Dad???

22 Jan

Well, maybe not everyone’s father, but in tons of movies at any rate.  Just check out J. K. Simmons’ Wiki page.  He’s Juno’s father.  In I Love You, Man, he’s Paul Rudd’s character’s father.  “Speedo full of brillo.”  That JUST kills me!  Also, not a technical father in The Closer, but a benevolent authority figure somewhat like a father.

I am staring to really like him.  I’ve seen him as the lovable, and humorous guy a lot.  Sort of a fun, push-over type in every role.  I guess I should watch Spider Man 3–sounds like he’s the villian.  Maybe that would be interesting.  Hopefully the role keeps his good sense of humor.

I had to say I was quite amazing when I recognized his voice in the remake of True Grit.  It was even un-credited!  I think this says good things about my future in audiology.

Olympic Cynicism

27 Dec

So everyone know those Chinese gymnasts are waaay below the minimum age limit allowed.  It’s not fair, and one day we’ll all read how their Asian government doctored their birth certificates and they were really 8 and 10 year olds.  But, even more sinister is (maybe prevalent) steroid use.  After reading a book about The German Doping Scandal, where German (swimming) athletes were (sometimes unknowingly) given steroids that enhanced performance at the detriment of overall health, and a book about BALCO, the company that gave sprinter Marion Jones and baseball (anti)hero Barry Bonds steroid injections, I just can’t help but think the worst about athletes.

I LOVE watching the Olympics.  I have the greatest sense of pride when I watch the competitors.  And when I hear our national anthem it sometimes moves me to tears.  Even when the great performances are not from Americans, I highly respect the athletic prowess, determination, and loyalty to sport required to make it.

And I used to trust in the Olympic drug testing.  But with incidents like Marion Jones, how can you?  Obviously, just like in every other arena (theft, drug-trafficking, etc) the criminals are ahead of science and regulators.  So now when I watch an incredible act of athleticism, instead of thinking how talented the person is, I wonder how long before they are caught cheating.  It almost ruins the whole thing for me.

I just know Usain Bolt, with his show-boating and seeming ease in the sprints, was on steroids. Maybe when science catches up with the criminals or when someone gets caught or steps forward, we’ll hear about it.  And certainly, I want to believe in Michael Phelps.  Eff those dirty “athletes” for casting the shadow of doubt over the true champions.  Phelps is perhaps the greatest athlete of all time–a real hero–despite weed indiscretion and obvious lack of intelligence (more on this later).  Feats such as his are so magical they are difficult to believe. I hope talent like that exists without the enhancement of illegal drugs, but who’s to know?

Shame on the people that damage the integrity of the games by taking illegal substances to enhance their performance.  Fans of sport such as myself should never have to wonder if the incredible speed, strength, agility, or endurance we are witnessing are for real.  Putting a question mark in the equation adds the seed of doubt to the whole fanfare.  The dirty “athletes” should be completely ashamed of themselves!

Starving for “Black Swan”

4 Dec

Mila Kunis weighed 117 lbs to begin with and took 5 months on 1,200 calories a day a a whole lot of training (5 hours a day) to lose 20 pounds.  For the movie, she weighed a mere 95 lb!!!!!!  And no surprise, Kunis reported that Portman [who I suspect already had disordered eating] “became smaller than I did.”

I liked the movie, and found the dancing scenes seemed very authentic to me as a non-ballet expert.  And of course, I was highly entertained by the lesbian sex scene between Portman and (very attractive) Kunis.  WOW–seeing Kunis give oral to Portman was a bonus I hadn’t expected.  Congrats to these two ladies for having the courage to do that on screen.  BUT, I feel I can’t totally support the Oscar hype of the movie because I don’t think the authenticity of the movie required those women to weigh under 100 pounds.  Even at their short heights (5’1″ to 5-3″ range) that is emaciated.  I strongly dislike how actresses are expected to be very thin in the first place.  And both actresses and actors are expected to lose and gain weight for particular roles.  Changing your body that dramatically is not great for you.

If professional ballet dancers must weigh 20 pounds less than (already thin) actresses–there is a big problem.  During my years as a competitive dancer, I remember the other dance groups (I was a clogger, which allowed a hardier frame) at Pinkerton Academy emphasized long, lean, graceful bodies.  It was the tall girls with long, thin limbs that were the most successful ballerinas.  But how does long and lean translate to 80-95 pounds?  That’s trouble.  No wonder eating disorders abound in dance circles.

Other then my problem with the pro-anorexia subtitles of the movie, I liked it a lot.  It did a good job of showing how the dance world (and world at large) throws women away when they’re passed their prime.  It’s nice to see Winona Rider acting consistently again, and she did a great job portraying the angry, emotionally unstable, ex-prima ballerina.  Sidenote–>  Why is it Rider was ostracized in Hollywood for shoplifting despite her large bank account, and stopped getting hired, while Halle Barry hit a person in her car and drove off without stopping to help or reporting it, and no one seemed to mind???  Then, Hit-and-run-Halle, as I now call her, was almost immediately cast as Catwomen, which was turned into a very successful blockbuster?  I think the latter offense is worse, and didn’t watch “Catwoman” for the longest time (even though that is my very favorite Batman villian) as a form of protest.  <–Back to the topic at hand:  Black Swan was dramatic and psychologically thrilling.  I just wish actress-dancers (or real-life professional dancers) didn’t need to starve to look realistic.