We were supposed to be just friends…/…Depending on what kind of mood and situation-ship I’m in/And what’s in my system/I think there’s been a glitch, oh, yeah…/…And I’m not even sorry/Nights are so starry, blood moonlit/It must be counterfeit…/…A brief interruption, a slight malfunction/I’d go back to wanting dudes who give nothing/I thought we had no chance/And that’s romance, let’s dance
Best believe I’m still bejeweled/When I walk in the room/I can still make the whole place shimmer/And when I meet the band/They ask, “Do you have a man?”/I can still say, “I don’t remember”…/…Diamonds in my eyes/I polish up real, I polish up real nice/Baby boy, I think I’ve been too good of a girl (too good of a girl)/Did all the extra credit, then got graded on a curve/I think it’s time to teach some lessons…/…I can reclaim the land/And I miss you (I miss you)/But I miss sparkling (ah, hey)…/…Sapphire tears on my face/Sadness became my whole sky…/…And we’re dancin’ all night…/…What’s a girl gonna do?/A diamond’s gotta shine…/…I polish up nice/Best believe I’m still bejeweled/When I walk in the room/I can still make the whole place shimmer
Big city, wrong choices/We had one thing going on/I swear that it was something/’Cause I don’t remember who I was before you/Painted all my nights/A color I’ve searched for since/But one thing after another/Lost in situations, circumstances/Miscommunications…/…Did you leave her house in the middle of the night?/Did you wish you’d put up more of a fight?/When she said it was too much?/Do you wish you could still touch …her?/Half-moon eyes, bad surprise/Did you realize, out of time/She was on your mind/With some dickhead guy/That you saw that night/But you were on something/It was one drink after another/Caught in politics and gender-roles/And you’re not sure and I don’t know/Got swept away in the gray/I just may like to have a conversation…/…Does it feel like everything’s just like second-best after that/Meteor strike?/And what’s that, that I heard, that you’re still with her/That’s nice, I’m sure that’s what’s suitable/And right
This will not be an exhaustive list (I do have a job) just a smattering of problematic items.
I’m not sure why people are acting so surprised. Taylor has some sketchy decisions in the past, loser “boyfriends” and is an integral cog in the capitalistic wheel.
I didn’t really know about any of these in real time. So I feel about detached to it all looking at it historically. I think it’s sexist to blame Taylor for the behaviors of her boyfriends, especially when I see her called out more than them. But she does have a platform, and she doesn’t tend to use it for advocacy, so the scales aren’t balanced.
Problematic Age Differences?
Abuser “Boyfriends”:
Taylor dated Jake Gyllenhaal who is a pretentious prick at best and an abuser of young powerless women at worst.
I don’t want to sound like I’m giving her a pass. But being under a microscope your whole life will let people SEE more of your mistakes, just statistically. I wouldn’t want all my horrible moments and bad decisions to be ubiquitous in the public’s consciousness. Taylor, being as visible as she is, will be held to higher standards. Unrealistic beauty and aging standards, the pressure of being a constant role-model, who she dates and how often, not to mention the quality of her writing, singing, persona, promotion, street fashion, albums, fitness, costumes, concerts, and all the numbers (sales, charts, etc, etc…). It’s a lot. Don’t take this as a defense, just some concerns that most people don’t have to deal with.
And now, this guy:
Like, nobody is saying it, because it’s not woke to “body shame” but let me state the obvious: He’s not on her level. Let’s just say it doesn’t make sense to me: Taylor Swift is a prodigy at writing, a smart business-woman, master marketer, successful beyond imagination, about to be a billionaire, and beautiful. I truly don’t understand how fans/media can think her self-esteem is so low, her morals so absent that she’s actually attracted to this dude. We’ll discuss it in the 3rd and final installment.
I split the songs up on the Lover album as well so we can delve into each one a bit more.
Cornelia Street
We were a fresh page on the desk/Filling in the blanks as we go…/…We bless the rains on Cornelia Street/Memorize the creaks in the floor/Back when we were card sharks, playing games/I thought you were leading me on/I packed my bags, left Cornelia Street/Before you even knew I was gone/But then you called, showed your hand
UGH, can researchers stop lumping gay men and lesbians into the same category as if we’re some homogeneous group?! I’d like to see many more categories of bi people too-they are certainly not a monolith.
All of this is total speculation on my part. Don’t come at me.
Who was the other relationship, and was it Taylor Swift?
Use of gender-neutral pronoun when she brings up “person” she had sex with prior to her marriage.
Very for “The Man” which seems apt if we’re talking about a one-sided (Kaylor)rebound relationship based on sex.
Girl’s trip. Girlfriends. Pure joy.
It sounds like Kelsea likes being around women a lot.
this version of myself.
Reminds me of Subject to Change which I think is discovering sapphic sexuality.
Secrets and crimes.
If you’re going down I’ll be going down too. It sounds like closeting to me. Are the secrets about her sexuality? Are the crimes cheating on her husband with a woman?
I’m awake.
Gay awakening
Not honoring yourself.
Kelsea wants to be true to herself, and her sexuality
You’re finding yourself.
You’re figuring your shit out.
It sounds like a lot of discovery that Kelsea is going through at age 29…
Oh God. Am I ready to date again?
Skirting the issue of dating.
I’ve never really dated, I don’t know how it works.
She got married at 22, but did she date as a teen? Maybe she doesn’t know how sapphic dating goes…
just put ourselves out there.
Let’s just vibe. It’s been fun.
Minimizing the new relationship in the interview.
Move on. Stay here? Be sad forever.
Could be a repression situation.
single? ha ha ha. Am I single? God…
There is a lot of panic about this seemingly simple question.
Maybe Kelsea doesn’t want to outright lie about dating a dude, but she also doesn’t want to come out if she’s dating a woman…
No
The interviewer makes an assumption and says a name.
Kelsea never says his name or brings him up. She just doesn’t correct the assumption.
A possible PR story:
Eden the Lounge:
Gay bars:
I’m just vibing.
Kelsea minimizes the new relationship again.
OK I want to see you.
What does that feel like though, to have that be so public?
It’s interesting a new relationship is being publicized so much. It’s like Kelsea’s team is pushing that story, but why? I’m not sure people love when a divorcee is already with another person quickly (I don’t make the rules). What is the reason a brand new relationship after a very recent divorce is being amplified? Maybe it’s covering up something else.
Also it’s new. Everything is new for me.
Again Kelsea talks about how new and novel this situation is.
Dating.
Being photographed with someone.
It’s also interesting how Kelsea’s pauses separate “dating” with “being photographed with someone”
It’s all really new and I’m tiptoeing.
She really emphasizes the newness, and says she’s being very careful. Why does she have to be careful dating a guy? Why does dating a guy feel so, so new to Kelsea? I mean, she dated Morgan, and married him. She knows what dating a guy is like.
I’m happy.
And I’m really, really learning a lot about myself.
More talk of uncovering things about herself.
It’s been like a really beautiful re-awakening.
Like waking from a 20 year dark night, perhaps?
How did you guys meet? I slid into those DMs.
This seems out of the blue to me.
My manager lives there and he like put the bug in my ear.
So HER MANAGER INITIATED the dating?!
He was like, you know this really cute
when you’re ready
it’s Chase
and I was like, you’re so right.
NOW I’ve seen the show.
Kelsea had not seen his show before writing to him…
but I just knew OF him.
I followed him and he followed me.
Purely online interaction that isn’t all that personal/romantic
we’re manifesting, baby
Basically we had been hanging out and people got a photo of us
Doesn’t sound very personal. They were in public together then a photo was published.
he was like, I mean, it’s going to keep going. So should I just like poke the bear.
He wanted to validate the rumor
and I was like sure.
Kelsea was also cool with the public knowing
the poking the bear was like a photo of me just like leaning in
Kelsea emphasizes the non-romantic nature of the photo
how long have you guys been together before that photo leaked
Another moment of hesitation and panic for Kelsea.
I mean, WE WEREN’T EVEN TOGETHER, like so relative, I know even really know…
Kelsea says they weren’t “together”
She also says she doesn’t know…
WE HAVE BEEN TALKING for since the beginning of December
It’s interesting that tour dates and promotion of the Heartfirst tour started in January.
I’m having fun. I’m having fun.
PARTNERSHIP
Idk if I believe in like the LEGALITY of it all
it should be a daily choice.
Yup, I’m implying Kelsea discovered she’s sapphic and left the marriage in part, to explore that side of herself.
I think Chase Stokes is a gay-buddy and bearding.
And I think Kelsea is dating a woman. IDK if it’s Fletcher, but they are sure playing up their thing.
Walkin’ through a crowd, the village is aglow/Kaleidoscope of loud heartbeats under coats/Everybody here wanted somethin’ more/Searchin’ for a sound we hadn’t heard before…/…When we first dropped our bags on apartment floors/Took our broken hearts, put them in a drawer/Everybody here was someone else before/And you can want who you want/Boys and boys and girls and girls…/…Like any great love, it keeps you guessing/Like any real love, it’s ever-changing/Like any true love, it drives you crazy/But you know you wouldn’t change anything, anything, anything
Blank Space
Magic, madness, heaven, sin…/…You look like my next mistake/Love’s a game, wanna play?” Ay…/…New money, suit and tie…/…Ain’t it funny? Rumors fly/And I know you heard about me/So hey, let’s be friends/I’m dying to see how this one ends…/…I can make the bad guys good for a weekend…/…You can tell me when it’s over, mm…/…Got a long list of ex-lovers…/…And you love the game/’Cause we’re young, and we’re reckless/We’ll take this way too far/It’ll leave you breathless, mm/Or with a nasty scar…/…But I’ve got a blank space, baby/And I’ll write your name…/…Stolen kisses, pretty lies/You’re the King, baby, I’m your Queen/Find out what you want/Be that girl for a month/Wait, the worst is yet to come, oh, no/Screaming, crying, perfect storms/I can make all the tables turn…/…Don’t say I didn’t, say I didn’t warn ya/THEY’LL tell you I’m insane (I’m insane)/’Cause YOU know I love the players…
Style
Midnight/You come and pick me up, no headlights…/…Could end in burning flames or paradise…/…And I should just tell you to leave ’cause I/Know exactly where it leads…/…And I got that good girl faith and a tight little skirt/And when we go crashing down, we come back every time…/…Oh, you got that James Dean daydream look in your eye/And I got that red lip classic thing that you like
Out of the Woods
Then discovered…/…The rest of the world was black and white/But we were in screaming color…/…Are we out of the woods?/Are we in the clear yet?…/…The night we couldn’t quite forget/When we decided, we decided/To move the furniture so we could dance/Baby, like we stood a chance/Two paper airplanes flying, flying, flying…/…Remember when we couldn’t take the heat?/I walked out, I said “I’m setting you free”/But the monsters turned out to be just trees/When the sun came up you were looking at me
All You Had to Do Was Stay
People like you always want back the love they gave away/And people like me wanna believe you when you say you’ve changed/The more I think about it now, the less I know…/…Then why’d you have to go and lock me out when I let you in?
Shake It Off
I go on too many dates [chuckle]/But I can’t make ’em stay/At least that’s what people say, mmm-mmm…/…And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate…/…I shake it off, I shake it off…/…I never miss a beat/I’m lightning on my feet/And that’s what they don’t see…/…I’m dancing on my own (dancing on my own)/I make the moves up as I go (moves up as I go)
More examples:
These had too many pics to post a concise list on this post, but check out the websites. It shows a lot of relationships, marriages, babies, cheating, fights, etc, etc… are orchestrated to generate buzz and ultimately sell a product:
You think I’m gonna hate you now/’Cause you still don’t know what I never said…/…I wish you knew that/I’d never forget you as long as I’d live…/…We’re a crooked love/In a straight line down/Makes you wanna run and hide/Then it makes you turn right back around…/…And remember what we were fighting for…/…This mad, mad love makes you come rushing
Exp 2:
Bad Blood
You know it used to be mad love…/…Now we got problems/And I don’t think we can solve ’em/You made a really deep cut…/…I was thinking that you could be trusted/Did you have to ruin/What was shining? Now it’s all rusted/Did you have to hit me/Where I’m weak? Baby, I couldn’t breathe/And rub it in so deep/Salt in the wound like you’re laughing right at me…/…Did you think we’d be fine?/Still got scars on my back from your knife/So don’t think it’s in the past/These kind of wounds they last and they last/Now did you think it all through?/All these things will catch up to you…/…If you live like that, you live with ghosts (ghosts, ghosts)/Band-aids don’t fix bullet holes (hey!)/You say sorry just for show …/…Hm, if you love like that, blood runs cold/’Cause baby, now we got bad blood
Wildest Dreams
…”Let’s get out of this town/Drive out of the city, away from the crowds“/I thought Heaven can’t help me now/Nothing lasts forever/But this is gonna take me down…/…I said, “No one has to know what we do”/His hands are in my hair, his clothes are in my room…/…You’ll see me in hindsight/Tangled up with you all night/Burning it down/Someday when you leave me/I bet these memories/Follow you around…/…Say you’ll see me again/Even if it’s just (pretend, just pretend) in your wildest dreams/In your wildest dreams/Even if it’s just stayed in your wildest dreams
How You Get the Girl
Stand there like a ghost/Shaking come the rain, rain/She’ll open up the door/And say, are you insane…/…And you were too afraid to tell her what you want, want…/…And then you say/I want you for worse or for better…/…Tell her how you must’ve lost your mind/When you left her all alone and never told her why, why/And that’s how it works/That’s how you lost the girl…/…Broke your heart, I’ll put it back together…/…And you could know, oh/That I don’t want you to go
This Love
High tide came and brought you in…/…Skies grew darker/Currents swept you out again…/…In silent screams/In wildest dreams/I never dreamed of this/This love is good/This love is bad…/…In losing grip/On sinking ships…/…This love left a permanent mark/This love is glowing in the dark…/…I watched you leave/Your smile, my ghost/I fell to my knees/When you’re young, you just run/But you come back to what you need
I Know Places
It’s a scene, and we’re out here in plain sight/I can hear them whisper as we pass by/It’s a bad sign, bad sign/Something happens when everybody finds out/See the vultures circling, dark clouds/Love’s a fragile little flame, it could burn out…/…’Cause they got the cages, they got the boxes/And guns/They are the hunters, we are the foxes/And we run/Baby, I know places we won’t be found and/They’ll be chasing their tails trying to track us down…/…Lights flash and we’ll run for the fences/Let them say what they want, we won’t hear it/Loose lips sink ships all the damn time/Not this time…/…they take their shots, but we’re bulletproof
You’re still all over me/Like a wine-stained dress I can’t wear anymore/Hung my head as I lost the war/And the sky turned black like a perfect storm/Rain came pouring down/When I was drowning, that’s when I could finally breathe/And by morning/Gone was any trace of you, I think I am finally clean…/…There was nothing left to do…/…So I punched a hole in the roof/Let the flood carry away all my pictures of you/The water filled my lungs, I screamed so loud/But no one heard a thing…/…Ten months sober, I must admit/Just because you’re clean, don’t mean you don’t miss it/Ten months older, I won’t give in/Now that I’m clean, I’m never gonna risk it
Flashing lights and we/Took a wrong turn and we/Fell down a rabbit hole…/…’Cause nothing’s as it seems/And spinning out of control…/…Haven’t you heard what becomes of curious minds?/Ooh, didn’t it all seem new and exciting?/I felt your arms twisting around me/I should’ve slept with one eye open at night…/…We found Wonderland/You and I got lost in it/And life was never worse but never better…/…Too in love to think straight/All alone, or so it seemed/But there were strangers watching/And whispers turned to talking/And talking turned to screams, oh…/…It’s all fun and games ’til somebody loses their mind…/…I knew I had to go back home/You search the world for something else/To make you feel like what we had/And in the end, in Wonderland, we both went mad
One look, dark room/Meant just for you…/…No proof, one touch/But you felt enough…/…You can hear it in the silence, silence, you/You can feel it on the way home, way home, you/You can see it with the lights out, lights out/You are in love, true love…/…He keeps his word/And for once, you let go/Of your fears and your ghosts/One step, not much/But it said enough…/…One night he wakes/Strange look on his face/Pauses, then says/You’re my best friend/And you knew what it was/He is in love…/…And you understand now why they lost their minds and fought the wars/And why I’ve spent my whole life tryin’ to put it into words
New Romantics
We’re all bored/We’re all so tired of everything/We wait for trains that just aren’t coming/We show off our different scarlet letters/Trust me, mine is better/We’re so young/But we’re on the road to ruin/We play dumb but we know exactly what we’re doin’…/…I could build a castle/Out of all the bricks they threw at me/And every day is like a battle/But every night with us is like a dream…/…Heartbreak is the national anthem/We sing it proudly/We are too busy dancing/To get knocked off our feet/Baby, we’re the new romantics/The best people in life are free…/…We’re all here/The lights and noise are blinding/We hang back/It’s all in the timing/It’s poker/He can’t see it in my face/But I’m about to play my Ace (ah)/We need love/But all we want is danger/We team up/Then switch sides like a record changer/The rumors are terrible and cruel/But honey, most of them are true
I can’t even believe that I have been writing this yearly series on the pitfalls of Valentine’s Day for 17 years! This one is exciting to me because I finally have some better language to describe my contempt for the day. Here is what I have been trying to put into words all these years of writing my anti-Valentine’s posts!
Yes, in our heteronormative society being single is a stigmatized, marginalized group.
For example: You (a single person) ask to leave work early for the day, but your married coworker always leaves early to pick up the kids.
Example 2: Equal coworkers apply for a day to care for a loved one. The married coworker gets the day because it is assumed she has more to do and greater responsibility for a family. The single coworker just has a bunch of free time if they’re not at work, and whatever relative they need to care for is not as important as a spouse or child..
1. ‘Are you still single?’
2. ‘There’s plenty of fish in the sea’
3. ‘At least you don’t need to waste your money’
4. ‘If you want my advice…’
5. ‘I have a friend that would be perfect for you!’
6. ‘Dating is a nightmare these days’
7. ‘You’re so lucky!’
8. ‘Have you heard of Tinder?’
9. ‘I can’t understand how you haven’t found someone!’
10. ‘You’ll find someone when you least expect it.’
I like to spread my posts out so the go up daily, but I AM TOO EXCITED about this! Here’s part 2 that I promised with the Sister Songs post:
You remember Myspace, right? Here’s this in case you don’t (this comes back later)
People thought Katy was alluding to a manufactured feud. I think (based on context) that Katy is talking about: sapphic, closeting, bisexuals/lesbians in the music industry, etc, etc… You’ll see what I mean, I’m about to show you.
Was Katy Perry calling out the fact that Taylor Swift had a young beard (dancers in drag/performing sexuality/gay males)? Instead of coming out of the closet?
Enter Bad Blood:
We know who the song is supposed to be about. But do we know the REAL reason or a manufactured reason to hide the gay of it all? A closeted person cannot call someone out for “outing” them, because, well, that’s the point. Instead Taylor has to use subtext to get her message across to Katy without pouring fuel on the (gay) fire.
Bad Blood
You know it used to be mad love…/…Now we got problems/And I don’t think we can solve ’em/You made a really deep cut…/…I was thinking that you could be trusted/Did you have to ruin/What was shining? Now it’s all rusted/Did you have to hit me/Where I’m weak? Baby, I couldn’t breathe/And rub it in so deep/Salt in the wound like you’re laughing right at me…/…Did you think we’d be fine?/Still got scars on my back from your knife/So don’t think it’s in the past/These kind of wounds they last and they last/Now did you think it all through?/All these things will catch up to you…/…If you live like that, you live with ghosts (ghosts, ghosts)/Band-aids don’t fix bullet holes (hey!)/You say sorry just for show …/…Hm, if you love like that, blood runs cold/’Cause baby, now we got bad blood
I think the bolded portions especially, show my point that Taylor is talking about an ex that outed her
The Feud:
SHE TRIED TO…OUT…ME
Katy’s Transgressions:
First loud encouragement in song (see my other post for the deets)
This is a part one leading up to a REALLY BIG discovery
Here’s a side by side comparison, Sparks Fly on the left and Firework on the left.
Key:
Magenta is weather related words and phrases
Red is feeling vulnerable
Lime is fireworks/sparks related words and phrases
Yellow highlight is fear of being gay and encouragement to come out and live authentically, respectively.
I wanted them side by side for easy comparison, but also it’s small to read so I’m going to post the Sparks Fly then Fireworks one after the other so people with worse eyes or small screens can read it too:
Catty Remarks