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The Bottom 9 of My Top 50 Albums of 2017 (is that enough numbers for you?)

7 Jan

#41-HAIM
Is that an all-caps name? I don’t really care for this band because it’s too 1980s. I can’t get past that retro sound.

haim

#42-Ani DiFranco
I usually loathe her because I think she thinks of herself as clever. I almost didn’t even listen to Binary because I can’t take her pretention. But the few songs that made my list are pleasantly discordant, and Ani actually bothers to sing, rather than just talk through them like she has in the past.

#43-Fastball
The one hit wonders are back with Step into Light. They sound much the same, actually, and I liked, “Best Friend” and “I Will Never Let You Down.”

#44-Foster the People
There is such a thing as too much hipster. It’s Sacred Hearts Club. I could live with “Static Space Lovers” and “Lotus Eater” but the rest are only good if you’re the type of person that shops at pawn shops (ironically) and has a handle bar mustache. Too much!

foster the people

#45-James Blunt
Two songs made my cut with “Heartbeat” being the better.

#46-Dolly Parton
I didn’t get the memo about I Believe in You, and I really hate to rank Ms. Parton so low on any list. But this album must be aimed at children? It’s…nice. But I’m not really sure what is happening with it—it’s not for my age group. But I think Dolly Parton is a really good person, and I’m glad she’s putting some good advice and lessons within her songs. It’s just not terribly listenable if you’re out of pre-school.

#47-Seal
Don’t get me wrong—I think it’s smart to jump in the mostly empty genre of swing. Why should Michael Buble reap ALL the spoils of a whole category of music? I feel like Seal’s foray into Sinatra-inspired music isn’t the best fit. OR it could be the Jim Carey effect. Either way, a few of the songs are good, but I’m mostly left thinking, imposter.

#48-Lee Brice
A little too saccharine for me. But listenable.

#49-Lana del Ray
I don’t really care for “dream rock.” It’s too slow, and boring. It’s not stoner music like Jack Johnson, nor is it soft rock (since even that has a hook or a tune). It’s flake music. Like a space-cadet music. Honeymoon is the same as usual. I can’t even be bothered to listen to the lyrics or tell you if the songs are cohesive. It’s just too slow to catch my interest.

honeymoon

#50-Rascal Flatts
Too much. It is whiny! And Trying too hard, and disingenuous. They are trying to recapture earlier fame, but the content isn’t believable or relatable. Very disappointing of an effort–I suggest they sing about what they’re actually feeling, instead of trying to contrive emotion in order to pander.