Tag Archives: frustrated

Moments of 2015-Bad

31 Dec

I see today (New Years Eve) as a day for reflection.  And I can’t say I’m sorry 2015 is over.  It wasn’t terrible, I’ve had much worse years.  But it wasn’t what I wanted either.  I like to know where I’m going, and in 2015 I never did.  I didn’t know if I would continue with school, and I didn’t know where my career would take me.  In the past, I’ve been severely disappointed when career objectives didn’t pan out, but this time I felt a calmness and grace about the situation.  Still, there is a dissatisfaction.  And now I’m left to really contemplate what I want in life.  But that’s a story for tomorrow, New Years Day, a day for goals and new beginnings.  Today I’ll post a few blogs about worst moments in 2015.  Which isn’t just picking the scabs of wounds, it’s thinking and it’s learning.  Seeing the worst times allows me to rearrange the circumstances to make next year better.

And again, I’m posting for the sake of time and forgoing a lot of re-writes.  I’ll edit later (maybe).

12TH WORST TIME OF 2015:  -Bob, at my new job, introducing himself as the janitor.  Trying to be funny, but offending me.  Insinuating of course he was much better than a crummy janitor.  He’s some client services administrator–big deal.  When he didn’t know that janitorial had been my very last job, and my father had been a custodian for 20 or 30 years.  What a D-bag.

11.  -Human drama at the YMCA.  Deb being all weird toward me because ???  and holding a grudge.  The churchy gal acting like a bitch and treating me like a lowly janitor.  Just coldness and unnecessary drama from people with nothing to keep their minds busy.  It was stupid, but even though I wasn’t invested in the drama, I noticed it, and had to DEAL with it.  Lame.

10.  -Rusty’s doors remaining half open in the winter.  Primarily because it rendered my remote start useless.  And obviously I NEED that.  I hate being cold.  So much so, that I had bought my own remote start and fought for them to put it in my manual–which is a liability for them and usually against the rules.  And I had always loved starting the car from inside the warm building.  But now it set off the alarm, because the doors were open just enough. . .

9.  -The unwelcoming, frosty environment at MSCL for my first 7 months working there.  NOBODY acknowledged me, talked to me, or anything.  I felt awkward and alone.  Those duds and douche-bags were the WORST!  Here’s an example:  I walk in as a brand new employee–and nobody (even my boss)  says hello.  Or I sneeze–and nobody says bless you or anything.  It was as if I was invisible.  I guess it’s because they have high turn-over, and they were change-averse.  And because it’s a lab, so people don’t have great any social skills.  But it still made me feel like it was ME.  And that brought back horrible memories of veterinary social problems that plagued my work life previously.  I had wanted new beginnings and to turn a corner in a new field–and this was not the start I’d hoped for.

8.  -Not getting into the UU AuD program, despite getting the 4.0, having extracurriculars, and working very hard on my application.  Was it the gay-themed activities I put on my application?  Bad interview answers?  Being from out-of-state?  I really don’t have any idea, and I feel like I should be in there.  Easily.  But this is toward the bottom of my disappointments (and the top of this list) because I’ve grown as a person, through my veterinary sagas.  I had to future plan, which wasn’t cool.  I still don’t know what I will do career-wise, which is scary and reeks of failure.  But I didn’t totally fall apart this time.  I took it in stride.  I do wonder how in the heck I didn’t get in that class, because I feel like I really deserved it and would have done an excellent job.  But I’m putting it on to them, not beating myself up over it.  And I’m not sure it’s what I want anyway.  I’m very disillusioned by the costs of school.  And I haven’t gotten ANY return on my undergrad investment.  And the forums scared me off of audiology a little, because they said Hearing Instrument Specialists can do almost exactly the same job, with NO school.  And they probably get paid equal or MORE than actual audiologists.  Also people talked about it being kind of a dead-end career, that’s highly redundant.  And I didn’t know if paying for 4 more years would even be worth it in the end.  But I’m still undecided, and haven’t closed the audiology door all the way.  Perhaps being 14th for a class of 12 was actually a favor to me. . .

7.  -When my parents insisted I call Dad’s chiropractor’s son about getting IN at Costco audiology–NOW, at the same time I frantically trying to complete a heavy-duty YWCA-UT job application and get ready for work at my current job.  They get overwrought and crazy and over-emotional, then there’s nothing for me to say or do to stop that crazy-train.  Unless I do what they say, when they say it, things fall apart quickly.  The whole thing just reminded me of every other time my parents tried to control me.  And how they were probably disappointed in me.  And that’s how the big horribleness of 2007 Cabin-Mansion had really kicked off the first time, so I was scared there would be a big blow up and subsequent melt-down of the relationship we had worked so hard to forge.

6.  -The meeting where work reneged on the full-time schedule, hours, and pay we had negotiated 3 days prior.  I had finagled the best schedule for my weekends, sleep, and time with Cool.  Everyone at work had left the meeting satisfied and happy.   They got coverage on a Sunday, which had been difficult to secure, I got Fridays and Saturdays off and a late-start Wednesday.  It was absolutely perfect and I commended myself for taking a chance and asking.  But 2 days later, they called me back in and told me I’d have to take the legit schedule I had applied for.  Because a girl (previously a bitch to me) who had more seniority, and was better at the job wanted to work Sunday.  And trying to please everyone, instead of defending me and the schedule they had promised me, they gave it to her.  So I felt betrayed (again) and like I had a much worse schedule.  But I also felt trapped.  What else would I do?  I needed this job, or it was back to veterinary assisting.  So I had to just accept it and deal with–while being really angry, frustrated, and un-trusting toward management–and that bitch.

5.  -When Cool picked a fight just 2 days after my good knows of getting a full-time job.  Cutting short my celebration.  Depression strikes this time.  Out of nowhere, Cool knocks the figurative wind out of me by acting like a major jerk.  It was awful, because I had just talked to my proud parents and had been super-ecstatic about my new job, and Cool knocked me down to a miserable level.  I was really sad about it, because I’m ALWAYS supporting Cool and she just didn’t have it in her to even pretend to return the favor–her depressive episode made it all about her.  Again.  I wished she could be supportive and celebrate with me, but instead her bipolar and selfishness ruined it all.  The memory of my new job is still tarnished.

4.  -Getting stuck with all the moving logistics, work, and most of the payments, because Cool went manic and in so doing abandoned me in a time of stress and need.  Which was the WORST because moving sucks anyway.  And there is so much to do and plan, and so much heavy physical work.  It wasn’t fair and I felt alone and unsupported.  Mental illness is the WORST sometimes.  It’s hard not to blame Cool, and that’s not really what I signed up for.  Cleaning the Spokompton apartment by myself was awful.  It was messy and there was so, so, so much left to do.  And it wasn’t fun, and I felt resentful that Cool had already started her job and couldn’t come do her share of the work.  Especially when I was cleaning things SHE had messed up.  Driving Rusty, alone, and wanting to come home and relax very badly, after such a tiring trip and no sleep.  Then walking into a messy house full of manic shenanigans, with a Craigslist ill-fitting futon we hadn’t talked about.  And dealing with having to clean and reconfigure everything, while dealing with a belligerent, unreasonable, manic person.  It was BAD.

3.  -Finding out I was just PRN (after they promised me something different in my interview).  I had interviewed over the phone for the job.  They said I was technically applying for a PRN job, but soon, they were posting a job with more regular hours.  That job was the same duties, but it was a year of guaranteed hours.  This PRN job, which had been posted was 25 hours a week for training, but then was substitute only.  Not stable, and not really what I wanted.  So they hired me during my phone interview, but told me they would call me when (slow) HR got around to posting the year-long job.  Then, I was to apply for that to make the paperwork legit, and that job would be mine.  I waited for the call to tell me that year-job had been posted and to complete that application.  And waited.  When I finally got the phone call from MSCL, they were wanting me to pick a start date for the as-needed job.  And pretended not to remember promising me the more stable-year long job.  I had written it down!  And the way my supervisor acted was callous–and I knew she remembered, but had just reneged.  But I had to take the lessor job, because what else was I going to do?  I needed an income after moving to a new state.  And sure enough on my first day of work, I found out they had hired a coworkers daughter for MY year-long job.  Nepotism had been at play, and as usual I got screwed at work.

2.  -The fear-phobia really, of being offered a job at a veterinary specialty hospital.  I had a sense of dread and sick feeling.  I should have never applied to veterinary hospitals, because my resume is just BUILT for them.  But I was feeling a little insecure and desperate about my guarenteed training 25 hours per week becoming true, as-needed.  I HAVE to work a minimum of 25 hours just to meet my bills, and that was soon to end.  And it’s my policy to ALWAYS interview for the practice if one is offered.  And while I know my veterinary experience is a major advantage in that field, I didn’t anticipate them loving me quite so much and being offered a full-time position on the spot.  The trouble was, it did seem like the best case scenario veterinary medicine could offer.  It was ONLY speciality referrals.  It was the BEST veterinarians in the state.  The hospital hirarchy was set up so there was a legitimate office manager and head vet tech to answer to–not the impulses of vets.  There was a true support system and everyone was on the same learning curve and truely didn’t leave you alone to fail.  And they seemed nice.  And said they didn’t yell–and I believed them.  And the technology was AWESOME.  They really had it all, not just the Idexx lab and digital x-ray.  Like ALL the toys, including MRI, and anything else spectacular.  But I had just such bad memories.  And I knew the schedules and the overwork, and the under-pay.  All the pit-falls, that really, I could no longer live with.  And it’s not what I want in life.  And the delimma was feeling like I HAD to take it, because I really had nothing else to fall back on, but feeling STRESS at the prospect of taking it.  In the end, I made the very, very difficult decision on not going backwards.  It was really hard (and brave) leaving veterinary assisting jobs in the first place, and I had done it for good reasons.  I had to keep up that bravery even when times got tough.  So I declined, but left the door open.  And they liked me so well, that they said to call any time I wanted a job.

  1.  VERY WORST 2015 MOMENT:  Thinking Goose might have thrown a clot to the leg, and worrying about his impending death, and worse, knowing there wasn’t a lot I could do to prevent it.  He randomly fell off the couch twice, and didn’t have use of his back leg.  It was too short to be a seizure (maybe) but didn’t have the pain of a thrombosis.  But my reference point was when the screaming cats had been brought to the vet.  Maybe there were precursor incidents at home that hadn’t been painful, and had gone ignored by owners–I didn’t know.  So of course, I thought the worst.  And I remembered the vets at Cats Meow preparing owners if there were any heart abnormalities.  Telling them to just make the decision to euthanize now, before emotions were involved, because once the clot was thrown, prognosis was grave.  And I remember the cats coming in-just screaming in horrible pain.  And owners saying it happened out of nowhere.  One day, the cat was fine, the next down in back and just SCREAMING.  It was awful to imagine that for my Goose.  And it’s still in the back of my mind, because he is a Maine Coon and they are notorious for heart issues.  But I’m hoping he was just being a clumsy dink, since it’s only happened twice, and the episodes were brief.

Saga of the Desk

16 Dec

This is taking me 8 months to write, because that’s how long this saga FELT at the time it was unfolding!

I can’t unpack 10 boxes (TEN!) until we buy a desk.  Right now, those boxes are lining the front wall of the living room.  Expensive items lined up right in front of a window.  In the main area of the house.  First thing you see (and trip on) when you walk in the door.  The cats jump on the important files and computer accessories.  This is not optimal.

I’m super-motivated to get a desk to finish unpacking.  I would have been finished after one week, if only I had somewhere to put office/computer/school items.  BUT I don’t want anything too big.  This desk has to fit in the living room, so it can’t be too bulky.  It also can’t be too heavy.  Because there is one LAST move in our future.  So it has to be light enough for Cool and me to carry, and a non-awkward shape that can also fit in one of our cars.  And since the rest of our cheap, WalMart furniture in the living room is black–it has to match.  And it would be ideal if the desk could fit in a corner–and store a lot.

Needless to say, this is a tall order.  And I didn’t want to settle on the wrong thing just to unpack quickly.  So we looked and looked.  And I found a really nice, black corner model.  And it was composed of cubes.  Which we have 3 cube shelves in the living room.  It provided 12 storage cubes and a desk space.  And best yet, this same desk was on Amazon, WalMart, Office Depot, and Target–widely available.

But I didn’t order it right away.  You see, we had just moved.  I had all the moving expenses on my debit and credit cards, and the same day we were looking for a desk–I bought a washer/dryer.  The latter purchase has been my ultimate dream-fantasy since I moved out of my parents’ house.  Coin-op is no way to live.  But it was nearly $2,000.  So I had to give my psyche (and wallet) a rest before making another big purchase.

No big deal.  The desk was in at least 4 places–a week’s wait would mean nothing.

So I waited a week.  Then when I went to the WalMart (cheapest of the 4 sites) to buy it–they were sold out!  Oh no.  But that’s OK, it was just a little more expensive at Target.  The black?  Sold out also.  What?  How could it possibly sell out at different stores in one week?!  But the white was available.  Not perfect, but maybe we could paint it?  Never-mind, nope.  That one was sold out too?  Office Depot had been pricey, but it wasn’t an option anymore either–sold out.  Why was there a run on our desk???????  Normally, I trust Amazon best and they have the best customer service and return policy–but the desk had always been double the price there.  It was through an outside seller.  Did we want it bad enough to pay DOUBLE?  No.  Not after moving.

We tried to forget the desk.  Couldn’t.  We tried to find something similar.  Not a thing.  We went to the manufacturer website.  They don’t make it anymore?  We though about building the same desk ourselves.  Cost of tools would out-price Amazon–then we’d have to store and move them.  Ugh this desk.  This dream desk. . .

The boxes remain unpacked. . .

So we decided this desk was the perfect desk and we couldn’t get it out of our heads, so we were willing to bite the bullet and pay the Amazon price.  This desk was PERFECT.  So I bought it from Amazon–at double the price, because that’s the only ONE we could find anywhere.

Then a week later, out-of-the-blue I get an e-mail from WalMart:  The desk is back in stock.  WTF?!!!!!!!!!!  At first, I didn’t even want to open the e-mail and look.  But then I knew the price was bound to be lower.  And sure enough, WalMart’s price was even lower then it had been the first time.

This time I could not hesitate.  I bought the WalMart desk at the discount price–I knew Amazon would do a return/refund.  I even had WalMart ship it to one of their stores in the hopes someone could even build the desk for me.  Then, I went to pursue the refund and was happy to see the Amazon desk was “preparing for shipment.”  It had NOT been shipped yet!  Lucky me.  So I merely canceled my Amazon order before it even went anywhere.

Relief!

Was short-lived.  I get an e-mail the next day, “Your item has been shipped.”  And it wasn’t WalMart is was Amazon.  Mother-fucker!  They had shipped my item even though I canceled it.  Now I would have to deal with the shipping companies-ugh.  The seller e-mailed me an apology (I’m suspicious they kinda on purpose didn’t see my canceled order) and told me to just refuse delivery.

Easier said than done.

But I didn’t know what carrier they used.  If it was USPS things were going to be stupid and slow.  If it was Fed-Ex, they would fling my package on my stoop and run before I ever got to the door. . .  I waited for the tracking info, but it never came.

When I checked my spam folder, I saw it was Fed-Ex–oh no.  I hate their service–Fed-Ex doesn’t care.  They rush and over-extend their employees so much that they just try to do the fastest thing.  I would never have a chance to refuse delivery.  I had to create an online account.  My desk was supposed to be delivered the next day.  So I changed the order so it would be held at a certain Fed-Ex location.  And I got a confirmation e-mail and everything.  Now, I could just call and refuse delivery, then get my refund.

But that’s not my luck.

I came home from work to a desk delivered to my apartment.  A giant, heavy desk.  I think the specs on Amazon said 140 pounds.  This was not going to be easy.  And for me–nothing ever is.

Ugh–now Fed-Ex had disregarded my instructions and I would have to deal with wrapping, carrying, and paying for this giant thing to be sent back.  It would be a real hassle, eat up MORE money, and I didn’t want to deal with it.

I e-mailed the Amazon seller and asked if they could just give me the lower price.  Because now, not only did WalMart have it in stock, Amazon itself had 9 of them–at the WalMart price.  No sense in jumping through hoops to return it when everyone else had it for the lower price anyway.  The seller said they just weren’t big enough to accommodate the prices that huge companies like WalMart and Amazon could do–which is understandable, but unfortunate.

And then there was this.

I didn’t want the cats to knock over the humongous box and squish themselves–it weighs a lot.  So I laid it on the floor.  And when I did I noticed a WalMart receipt?  Did the Amazon seller get the desk from WalMart then re-sell it to me?  Nope, sure enough there was a WalMart.com return address.  What happened?  Could this have coincidently been shipped to my house (instead of the store, and a week early) on just the day Fed-Ex was supposed to deliver my Amazon desk to the apartment?  Certainly not. . .

But it did!  I knew this because then the Fed Ex desk came–from the Amazon seller.  Now I had TWO desks.  Heavy, heavy desks.

I complained to Fed Ex.  They said sure enough they saw my “hold at office” request, but ignored it and delivered it to my door anyway.  Delivered and ran–before I could refuse it.  They didn’t care.  I complained to the Amazon shipper again.  To his credit, he made things relatively easy on me by arranging for Fed Ex to pick the desk up at my apartment.  At least I would not have to haul the heavy thing anywhere. . .

When the (same) Fed Ex guy came to pick it up, he said he saw the “hold” request, but his boss said to deliver anyway.  WTF?!  And he hauled the desk away.  And I got the very expensive price refunded.

But the story is not over.

We had to build the desk.  And as soon as I opened it, I saw it was CHEAP.  But after all that trouble, we were keeping the crummy thing, dammit!

So I start following the sparse and convoluted picture instructions.  It said glue this to this, and glue that to that, glue, glue, glue.  But the glue was CHEAP.  And messy.  And even when you held things in place for a good 5 minutes, they came right apart when you let go.  Or came apart while you were gluing the next items.  I supplemented with Guerrilla glue or some-such superior product.  Then I noticed the camber (whatever the lock-screw thingies are called)  hanging out.  The directions were written in a backward way!  No wonder the cheap piece of crap wouldn’t stay together–it should have been cambers first, then glue just for added insurance.

I had to rip apart everything I had done (for like 2 hours) and start over.  AAARRRRRGGGG!

I tried to take it apart without damaging the cheap, cardboard-like pieces.  Which was too easy in most cases given the time it took to glue it in the first place.  And start over.  By this time I was over it.  And those camber things are always a frustration.

So I started the assembly over.  And did I mention I was OVER it?!  So it wasn’t built carefully and with eye to detail.  It was forced together in the way it should have been from the start.  But everything about the desk, the instructions, and the supplies were cheap.

So what did we end up with?  A black cubby desk that looks nice (from afar) and matches the living room, that allowed me to finish unpacking.  Is it functional?  NNNoooooo.  Don’t put any weight on the desk–it’s unsturdy.  Don’t touch it, because the glue that was supposed to hold on prominent pieces was crap.  So if you come close to the desk, try to put something on the wrong shelf, or heaven-forbid try to move the desk–you quickly see/feel it’s hanging together by a thread.

It’s not going to make another move, that’s for sure.

Typical of Saint George Vet: Interview Schedule

7 Jun

7-16-08

Hello —-,

 

The  Board of Admissions is pleased to invite you to attend an interview as

the  next  stage  in  your application to St. George’s University School of

Veterinary Medicine.

 

Your  interview will take place in Stillwater, OK.  It will be conducted by

Patrick Morgan, DVM, a representative for St. George’s University School of

Veterinary  Medicine.    Dr. “old dude” will be contacting you to arrange for a

convenient  date  and time to interview.  He will also furnish you with the

directions at that time.

 

While  the  primary  goal  of the interview is to assess the attributes and

motivations  of  the  veterinary  school  candidate,  this  is  the perfect

opportunity  for  you  to  learn  more about our facilities and programs as

  1. I  am  sure  that you have already given thoughtful consideration to

many  aspects  of  a  veterinary  medicine  education, and we would like to

encourage  you  to  address  any  specific  questions about St. George’s in

particular directly to us.

 

 

Please note that at the start of your interview, you will be asked to write

a  brief personal essay. You will be given about 10 to 15 minutes to answer

one out of three questions. The questions are based on personal experiences

or  motivations.  The essay is a great opportunity to tell us a little more

about you.

 

Once you have confirmed your arrangements, please inform me via email.

 

Thank  you for your cooperation and interest in St. George’s University. We

look forward to meeting you.

 

 

Regards,

Admissions Counselor

U.S. Admissions

 

St. George’s University

N American Correspondence

C/o University Support Services LLC

One East Main Street

Bay Shore, NY 11706

9-5-08
Good afternoon, [not my name]. I am back from Grenada and trying to set my calendar for the remainder of September. Please send me a list of dates you can come to Stillwater with your preferences in order. I will schedule a date as close to your first choice as possible. I look forward to talking with you about your chosen career.
“old dude,” DVM

 

9-10-08

Good morning, [my actual name, thank you]. You get 1st choice, Sept 23rd. Let me know whether you would like to interview morning or afternoon and, if you have a specific time that is best for you, let me know. I will not make other commitments on the 23rd until I know your preferences. I have your application papers so you don’t need to bring any of that. You should prepare an outline of how you will finance your 4 year DVM program.

Do you want me to make a motel reservation for you or send you the telephone numbers of local motels? I look forward to talking with you.

old dude, DVM
Adjunct Professor, SGU/SVM

Hello ——,

A final determination can take up to 4 to 6 weeks depending on how often
the Board meets and how competitive your file is. Feel free to contact me
for any updates after your interview.

Regards,
Admissions Counselor

I’m starting to panic. This vet school interview isn’t scheduled yet. My guy is not dependable at all. He put this off until September, forgot to call, didn’t even remember me when I called, pretended that he was planing on calling me that day, then blew me off and never called back. I don’t know if I should pester him and make him angry, or wait, or change my interview location. . . Then, I see people are getting accepted for January, possibly taking my scholarships, and they had to wait a month after their interview to find out! I feel powerless and stressed!

I need to calm down. I can’t do the interview for at least 2 weeks anyone. During that time, I will have my surgery and make $3,000 to fund my education. I can also have time to plan the trip and get dad together if necessary. That leaves me about 14 weeks, or four months to get my shit together. That’s plenty of time. I can fly Gandhi to Nevada and be there for Nevada day. Then, I can go back to Missouri, work and pack the rest of my apartment. Since everything is already in storage it won’t take long. I can clean the apartment and be done. The lease doesn’t run out until the end of December.

What else needs to be done before I go to another country? I need to sell some stuff, but I typed a list yesterday. Today I should look on the newspapers and see how to post an add. Going to Nevada later than Halloween won’t be so bad—I’ll make more money at my job, not pay for an empty apartment, and only have the chance to fight with my parents for 7 weeks. That’s plenty of time to spend with my parents. It’s over the holidays. As long as I’m there by Thanksgiving it will work out fine. If I’m here, I can moake money, study in peace, and write my book. That’s good.

This is fine I only need to know by October 20 if I’m going. A week to make my plane reservation. You know, I can actually make that reservation to fly Gandhi as soon as I can pay for it. I need to start communication with Aunt Linda to see about Choco-luv first. Ok, no worries. This gives me a chance to practice interview questions and write essays. Ok, sell stuff, write Aunt Linda, get rid of some stuff and maybe start cleaning empty parts of my apartment. Get dad’s train route, and my driving route.

9-13-08
Good morning, —–. Anytime 9 to 10 AM would be best for me. Let me know where you will be staying as some of the motels have very good places to have a private conversation and some do not. If you are staying in one of the latter, we will talk in my home office. I retired from Okla. State in 1995 and thus have no university office.

As to your writing assignment, you are correct in that I cannot tell you specifics except that you will be given your choice of three questions relating to the veterinary profession.
This is designed to be spontaneous and of short duration. From what I have seen in your application you should have no problem with this assignment.

Usually the SGU Registrar’s Office does not tell the applicant anything about the interviewer, but the interviewer knows quite a bit about the applicant. My career is a testimony to the many opportunities available to veterinarians. I have been a veterinarian 50 years and married to the same lady 50 years. DVM from UGeorgia 1958, 4 years with USDA, MPH from Tulane Medical Center 1963, 2 years US Army, DrPH Tulane 1968, 1 yr clinician in Tulane Medical School laboratory animal facility, 5 years faculty/administrator in Tulane School of Public Health and Tropical Medicine, 23 years combined work with OK Dept. of Public Health, OKU School of Public Health, OKStateU School of Veterinary Medicine, 1 yr faculty/administrator Ross U SVM St. Kitts W.I., 2 yrs owner/clinician small animal out patient clinic in South Louisiana, last 2+ years part-time consultant with St. George’s U/SVM. There; more than you ever wanted to know.

My interviews usually are 1 to 2 hrs depending on how many questions the applicant asks me.

I look forward to talking with you on the 23rd. My Stillwater telephone # is —–.

old dude, DVM

9-15-08
Good morning, —–. I need to meet with you a little earlier than we had planned; 8:30 AM in the lobby of the Fairfield if this works for you. If not, please call me at—–.

Patrick Morgan, DVM

Hello ——,

Are you still interested in applying to our school, I haven’t heard from
you in quite some time.

Regards,

Thank you, and good luck!

9-16-08
Once your interview is over your summary will be forwarded along with your
file to the Board for a final determination. If you have any other
questions, or concerns please let me know!!

Regards,

9-29-08
I was just wondering if Dr. old dude sent my interview paperwork to the
school yet. I’m very anxious to find out if I’m accepted!

Thanks!

Yes ——-,

Your file is currently with the Board, I should have something within a
couple of weeks. Feel free to check your status at any time!

Regards,

10-6-08
Yes, they have, and I have checked on your file last Friday (I usually
check every week on the review progress). I’m hoping to get a decision
back as soon as possible, however keep in mind that the usual time frame
can take up to 6-8 weeks. I’ll call you as soon as I hear something and in
the mean time feel free to check up on your file as many times as you like!

Regards,

When It Rains, It Pours: April [unpacking-round 1]

2 Jun

-We arrive so our new apartment in Salt Lake City!  We are tired of driving, tired of sitting, tired of being greasy and dirty.  I’m hungry and thirsty.  Cool is bored.  The cats are scared and in need of soothing.

crazy cat

-But that is not in the cards for us.  We have no time for even a short break, because we are in multiple parking spots and the neighbors will be getting home from work soon.  We get there and have to start unpacking right away.

-Our stuff didn’t fill the 16 foot Penske to the top, but don’t think we didn’t have a lot.  We have a LOT of stuff!  And on this leg, it was just up to Cool and me–we had no help for the heavy or awkward items.

-Our apartment is situated a little awkwardly.  It’s like a remodled motel or something and we are on the bottom floor.  Which should be easy.  But the bottom floor is down 5-6 stairs.  And the stairs are 2 units to the right or left of our door.  And the stairs aren’t just a straight drop down, there are 3 north-facing steps, then a landing, then 2-3 south-facing steps.  This 180 degree turn made any large item difficult to manuver.  The other access point was a ledge.  Most of the concrete edge in front of our lower floor has a gate.  But at one point just to the side of our door, is a 4.5-5 foot concrete ledge that meets the level of the parking lot.  I’ll try to post a picture, because this sounds confusing.

SLC-all moved in 031

 

-Anyway, so I was in charge of climbing into the back of the truck, lifting items to the edge, getting out of the truck, grabbing things (at chest-height) from the truck, walking across an aisle in the parking lot, and setting the item on this concrete ledge.

-Cool, stood down, on our apartment’s level and picked the items (at shoulder height) off the curb, took 3-4 steps into the apartment, and theoretically put them in some logical place to be unpacked later.

-I found out I had the more vigorous part of the job.

-OK, maybe this doesn’t sound super-unrqual to you, but here’s a little snippet of how the afternoon went.  I’m doing the physical labor.  Cool is on her phone.  She decides reception isn’t optimal inside of the apartment, so she goes in the concrete ailse-way.  I’m like, “What are you doing on your phone?!  Help me!!!”  Supremely irritated (at me and the perceived phone reception) she growls and walks up the steps.  Then, she trips over her own feet, fall down on the parking lot, like, rolls (all the neighbors are staring), and lies on the asphalt.  Making a real scene and being a doofus.  THAT’s the kind of “help” I got. . .

-I also found out later, Cool simpy stacked, threw, stuffed items as close to the door, in a mass in the living room, for me to sort later.

-But the unloading had to get done, so I pushed and sweated, and got more dusty and greasy and tired.  We finished by 5:30PM, which was past when people were getting home, but I think they could see us struggling so no one gave us a hard time.

-THEN, we had to find a place to put the Penske.  Because now it was in the middle of going-home traffic in a new city (of bad drivers) adn we weren’t about to return a 16 foot truck just then.  And don’t forget we haven’t had a break (or food) since our arrival.

-So we went to the corner lot next door, some studio, “by appointment” who had ample parking.  I wanted to ask, but no one was there.  So figuring no one would go through the trouble of towing a Penske, we just parked it on that property.  Oh well. . .

-Things had settled down enough after 9PM to think about driving the Penske again.  On the map, the turn-in location looked very close, and really easy.  Go all the way down our street, turn right, then turn left.  Done.  In practice, it was much different:  The right turn was over-crowded with tons of cars speeding onto the interstates.  How could it be so busy this late at night???  Why aren’t people cutting a 16 foot truck any slack???  I had to turn right, but then get over 4 lanes to the left to make my turn.  And of course, no one would let me over–even though I was substantially bigger.  And I couldn’t SEE them.  Unfortunately, also, if you missed the turn there was no place to go but the freeway, then way down to the next exit.  Ugh!  So the 2nd time around I literally stopped in the road prior to my turn–they would just have to wait so I could get into my lane.  I completed the left.  Only to find, the directions were to make a U-Turn backwards and into the dark, Penske lot.  As soon as I pulled into the parking spot, tired, all ramped up from the crazy drive, and stressed–I realized the tank was empty.  We had to do it again after finding a gas station!!!!  Nope.  I would not be driving that again in that horribly, pushy, speeding traffic.  I was lucky to make it in one piece the first time–there would be no next.  So I had to make the tough choice to either buckle-down and drive that again, or take the fees.  As returning the Penske was harrowing, I chose the latter, which would turn out very expensive.

-As all of this was going on, and we were at maximum stress level, some guy approached us in the Penske parking lot.  Attention boys and men:  If you see women (especially one woman, by herself) she NEVER feels comfortable about you engaging her.  Especially after dark or in a sketchy place–we were in both.  This guy comes up and asks if we speak English.  Then he asks for money for gas.  Which I was like–do you see this Penske we just got out of?  There’s where all our money went.  He persisted by saying a police officer had told him this was a bad area and he really needed to get home.  What, now he wants us to take him somewhere?!  Lame.  Walk your a$$ the 5 blocks to Tracks and use the more then ample public transportation.  I was over it and disengaged.

-We got home, and I was ready for shower, jammies, bed.  BUT We had no hot water.  The gas had not been turned on yet.  I had to go to bed that night without a shower.  Morale was low.  Surpringly low.  When I was all tired and greasy (from a long drive and unpakcing and lack of shower for now 16 hours) it was very depressing.  Our first night in Salt Lake City, and there was no excitement–just greasiness.

-The next day, I called at 7AM, right when they opened, to get gas to heat our water.  I was told it would be turned on tomorrow.  Oh no!  That could not occur, we would need it today!  Yes, I fussed.  OK, they would do it by 4PM.  Lesson:  I guess fussing is the way to go and people will bend rules for you.  Which sucks because I usually follow rules and therefore have to wait longer, pay more, and deal with more hassle.  But not this time.

-Except by 2PM, we hadn’t heard anything, and the business day was quickly coming to a close.  I did NOT want to miss my chance at hot water!  Finally after a 2nd phone call (squeaky wheel gets the grease) the gas was turned on.

-Or was it?  We still had no hot water.

Sutro Pool Party 005

-We called the gas company and they said the pilot light probably wasn’t lit.  We called our landlord to try to get someone to take a look.  We called the gas company who were extremely hesitant to talk me through lighting over the phone.  But I persisted, because by this time, I was not only expired, I was curdled.  My hair is always greasy when I wake up, so I need a shower daily.  Add in long drives, sweaty, vigorous unloading of a truck, nervousness of returning said-truck, then dusty unpacking–I was disgusting.  I tried to light the pilot light.  I tried and tried.  It clicked away, but I never saw a flame.

-After the 4-5th call to our landlord, and many hours, maintenance finally lit our pilot light.  It took him 2 tries and I’m sure we looked like helpless girls having to call in a man.  But I’m sure all my pressing, worked most of the air out of the line–it had been off for 3 months.  So it looked easy for him, but only because of my previous efforts.  And whatever–hot water was going to be on.

-Agh–a shower.  Finally!  Now we live here.

Next up:  Oh yes, there’s more!  The moving never ends!

Procrastinatee

12 Oct

As in:  I feel procrastinatee about several things right now, but maybe it’s tiredness?

-I agreed to transcribe language samples again this semester, yet have only done half of one.  And I keep moving the notification ahead on my calendar to-do list.  I agreed because my favorite professor asked me to.  Also, because I won’t be a student in the winter so I can’t do in then as I had intended.  But it’s harder then I remember, and things keep coming up.

-I would love to get my grad school application off my plate.  To have it finished, get it off the to-do list, and 11perhaps secure the best funding (is that a thing?) but I keep pushing that forward because it needs to be RIGHT.  I have to finish editing the essays and everything before I can get to this and they are not quite where I want them.  Plus, I don’t know for certain if early applications receive any extra deals or funding over the ones turned in on deadline (1-15-15).

-I need to edit and finish my personal statement.  I haven’t finished this up because it was suggested that I re-organize it entirely.  So it feels to me like instead of wrapping it up and just combing it for errors–I’m back in the middle of the writing process.  I want it done as best as possible, but now this stage requires more concentration then my studies and work schedule seemingly allow.

-I’m also procrastinatee about my scholarly paper.  But because I got good editing marks, that I need to read through and employ and I never seem to have a long chunk of time to do the whole thing.  I don’t want to get in the middle somewhere and have to remember which items I’ve corrected and which I still need to do.

superior-frontal viewBasically, it comes down to the fact that neuroanatomy takes a lot of my unscheduled time.  I have to make study materials for it-and study them.  And phonetics, even though I’ve used it a lot, has a billion tests (6 already) that I have to do practice for.  So it seems when I’m not actually scheduled to be somewhere, or doing the class stuff, I’m either sleeping, or too tired to focus enough.

Or Cool is a distraction.  Her moods are always up and down, meds always coming or going, or I just want to take advantage of the good days.  So that takes some concentration and attention away.  It’s a frustrating thing, but I think I’ll be caught in this loop until something gives–school semester (will hopefully be the thing).  I don’t want to jeopardize my grades trying to get this (mostly writing) stuff done.  When the semester is done I’ll really push to finish the writing and submit the application.

I’m Sick. And Grumpy.

20 Aug

Last night I started feeling worse and worse.  Normally when I feel something coming on I go to bed super-early.  But I will have to work til midnight really soon and my body is already going to be shocked.  As such, I HAD to stick it out until 9:30PM.  I felt so bad that I turned off my alarm clock (I never sleep to the alarm, but I’d be too nervous if I didn’t set it–just in case) for cleaning the vet hospital in the morning.  I try to go there every other day and had gone Monday, so was set to do it today.  But I had called Monday to make Rusty an appointment–and of course Wednesday was the first they could get me in.  And they were very explicit that I should drop off at 7:30AM.  So with the (impending) sickness, I didn’t think I should get up at 3-4AM, drop off the car, and be unable to nap.  If I get in bed after 5:20AM, I CANNOT sleep no matter how hard I try.  Anyway, so I decided I would clean work Wednesday night and still get it done on the every other day.

I slept fitfully because my body is trying to get sick and out of guilt for not cleaning–even though it’s a flexible schedule and I just have to make sure and go 3x/wk.  But I felt bad anyhow.  In the morning (the cats woke us up at 5:30AM, so I didn’t get tons of sleep), we went to drop Rusty off.  And–he had written that I called on Monday, but neglected to put me on the schedule for today.  So skipping work and dropping off was unnecessary because he put me on the very bottom of their full schedule.  Annoying.  And I felt icky so I almost said something about it.

At the track, I had intended to run a record 400m today.  I thought maybe if I warmed up slowly it could still be done.  Because I’m not completely sick, I can just tell it’s coming on.  But there is still time for preventative sleep/warmth/Zicam/vitamins/fluids.  But as soon as I started jogging I instantly felt TERRIBLE.  Everything ached, I felt tired, my muscles were stiff.  It was unpleasant.  I changed my mind about any speed work and just did a slow 2 miles practicing switching long strides and quick strides.  

When I got back to the apartment complex, the trashy-trashy, white-trash trashy lesboz that park next to us were over the line half in our spot.  So I had to squeeze in very tightly.  And when I opened the door, I was confronted with their barf-covered passenger door.  Who pukes on their car??!  Disgusting.  Cool wrote a note, but the tone was annoyed.  And I am all about feeling annoyed, but hesitated to give it to them, because, trashy people have no boundaries and who knows how they might retaliate.  But Cool put it on their barf-mobile anyway.  Fast-forward:  Next time I went to the car, theirs was gone, and the note was crumpled beside Cool’s car. . .

Rewind:  I went home and Cool made a wonderful huckleberry waffle breakfast.  I was feeling so crummy that the impossible occured and I actually was able to nap for 30 min.  But it wasn’t enough and I still felt like crud.  I get, for lack of better word, annoying sickness.  There’s no outward signs, but I feel feverish and fatigued.  Standing in the kitchen to make a frozen drink for Labor Dave about did me in, and I felt really crummy.  So I look a-OK, but feel ick-scum.  If it does come full-on (it hasn’t yet) I’ll get a fever and a head-cold.  Not cool times for public or for sitting in class.

Anyway, I didn’t get a call until 1:30PM asking permissions and pricing.  So I should have gone to work, and Rusty will not be finished today.  Which is super-annoying, because now Cool goes to work and I’ll have to clean at 3-4AM tomorrow–sacrificing more sleep when I’m (getting) sick.

That’s all.  I’ll work on my graph blogs today since standing up seems too much.  That reminds me, there are just 5 days til school starts and I have a HUGE list of things to do before then.  I’m mentally going insane, but my body won’t cooperate–it’s going to be a low productivity day when I need to kick it into high gear >:-[

Don’t Mistake Me for Your “People” [prequel part A]

18 Jul

I don’t mind doing my job at work–or even going the going the extra mile. But I do not like when people (the vets) start to take advantage and cross the line.  Maybe I’ll do something nice, extra that’s personal.  But don’t expect personal favors all the time.  Or worse, reprimand me when I don’t deliver them.  And I have worked for some vets (few and far between) that actually maintain boundaries and do things for themselves, perhaps even jumping in to clean an exam table once in awhile.  That’s highly appreciated.  But the other side of the coin is highly offensive, and deserves a rant.  Here are 3 examples (though there are many more things):

grumpy

For instance, I am fine with doing laundry at work. And I will wash doctor coats or coworker’s scrubs. And I’ll dry them and hang them. But don’t expect me to check your pockets as if I’m your mother. MY mother didn’t even check my pockets as a child.  Be a big girl and take the pens out yourself.  And if I wash your badge–you shoulda removed it before throwing it in the laundry basket–your fault, not mine.  PS–if this happens repeatedly, get frustrated at yourself and what a slow learner you are.  It’s simple, if you don’t want it washed remove it prior to mixing your item in with all the ick-scum laundry.  An addition to laundry–don’t require me to lint roll personal items as if I’m your personal assistant.  I mean, writing it as a to-do item on the white board?!  Are you kidding me with that?  Yeah I did it:  Under “Lint roll jackets” I put and iron slacks and fetch dry cleaning?  ‘Cause, come on.  I’m not your fucking maid.  You’re lucky I even wash your personal clothes–I pay coin-op to wash my scrubs at home, just like every other employee.  Also, I just work here–as a (very, very busy) veterinary assistant, P.S.

And you can clean your own personal desk too.  THAT’s not my job.  And we both know if I misplaced something, threw it away, or something turned up missing/lost you would jump all over my case in a heart beat.  You don’t even like when I touch the files you’ve yet to write up–and that’s a legit part of my job!  I want NO responsibility over your personal stuff.  I don’t ask you to buss my table when I’m finished eating lunch (when I get one, that is) so don’t ask me expect/require me to organize your personal space.

A major pet-peeve of mine:  When people bring their pets to work [which I’m not a fan of b/c it’s distracting, takes up valuable space, and requires someone’s time], but don’t care for them, clean them, or clean the cage/kennel when they’re finished.  Yes, I do these things for paying CLIENTS.  That’s part of my job.  A job I’m doing the whole time I’m at work.  When employees and vets bring their pet–that’s out of my realm.  That takes away from the clients and animal care I’m supposed to be providing.  And your personal animal’s $hitty crate, like really messed up pooped and barfed on Vary kennel–that’s all YOU.  Don’t strategically leave it laying around all dirty, don’t wait 10 hours to address it–if you bring something in, come earlier then you’re supposed to be at work so you can handle all personal business before you have to clock in.  Once you’re at work, your time belongs to the business–so does mine.  You bring it in, you deal.  Especially when we are already busy, you didn’t put it on the schedule, and you bring in 3-4 animals every week.  Or daily.  Also, don’t expect us to take time away from hospitalized patients, emergencies, drop-off, and scheduled appointments during business time to take your (or your friend’s) pet’s vitals daily, do diagnostics, etc. . .  Surprise this is a business.  And surprise, surprise I’m NOT your slave–even though I work like one.