Taylor Swift’s Gay Moments: Midnights ~ Midnight Rain

Midnight Rain 

…I wanted that pain…/…All of me changed like midnight/My town was a wasteland/Full of cages, full of fences/Pageant queens and big pretenders/But for some, it was paradise/My boy was a montage/A slow-motion, love potion…/…I broke his heart ’cause he was nice…/…It came like a postcard/Picture perfect, shiny family/Holiday, peppermint candy/But for him it’s every day/So I peered through a window/A deep portal, time travel/All the love we unravel/And the life I gave away…/…I guess sometimes we all get/Just what we wanted, just what we wanted…/…I guess sometimes we all get/Some kind of haunted, some kind of haunted/And I never think of him/Except on midnights like this (midnights like this)

2022 Progress on Goals (dependent on mood)

It’s funny to see only 15 days below meh, because the year felt BAD. 130 days of 365 (35.6%) were less than good. It’s interesting how our perceptions don’t always match the quantitative data. It makes me wonder what percent my perception changes. I should look at 2021’s moods, because I consider that more good than bad even though I was bullied at work for 11 months. OK, just checked: I had 103 days below good that year. 28.2%. So somewhere between 28 and 36 percent of less than good days is a neutral perception of the year. Weird…

It’s also interesting that it feels like I mostly spend my life working. But it looks like I relax and workout more than I am at work. I suppose the NUMBER of incidents and the HOURS per activity impact this. Sure, I find time to watch TV while I eat dinner nearly every day, but for a brief time. While I’m clocked in 8+ hours. Same with treadmill–yeah, I do it EVERY day of my life, but the longest mile is no more than 15 min (and I probably average 12min/mi).

Things I did well on:

Running and watching TV to relax are the activities I did more than 70% of the days of the year. I also worked out in some manner 84% of the year. It looks like less, because I broke it down into specific types.

Things I need to work on:

30.7% of days in 2022 I did something towards moving.

26% of the days I was tired all day, which probably impacts the next two stats.

26% of days I was anxious–why does it feel like so much more?!

25% of the days I was irritable.

15% of the days I felt stressed out, and I don’t know how that’s so low. Maybe I forgot to log it some days?

Shopping is not really accurate. Amazon has become our grocery store for a lot of food and toiletry items that we NEED. This year I modified 2 categories to track this better: Grocery-NEED and Shopping-Extraneous & fun. Then we can tell how much we’re buying unnecessary things.

An abysmal 5% of the days I talked to my parents on the phone. Partially because of actual packing, driving, and work overtime logistics, partly due to stress making me a tired lump. The time zones are a BIG problem. I am zonked out in the afternoon, and not in the mood to engage, think, be social. So week days are out because their 5PM is our legit bed time. But all of my stuff that I can’t do during work get stacked up on the weekends, so I don’t want to devote a lot of time talking. I think if we shorten the calls, we’ll be able to talk more often. I would also like to start other modes of communication, that are easier, and less time of day dependent.

Dammit! I had just been good at habitually flossing. But it fell apart in 2022. I flossed 59% of the time, which is 36% less than the year before. It just goes to show that you enter survival mode under duress. I want and need 2023 to be more stable so I can work on these things again.

Our water fell by nearly half as well. It’s a lot due to inability to pee just whenever. If you’re home all the time you don’t have to worry about that. If you’re driving or whatever, you can’t just load up on water first. The reduction is also due to the weather difference. Those triple digit temps do motivate you to drink more! Now that things have calmed down, this needs to become a priority again.

15% of the days we had restaurant food. It’s better than our quarantine years (we cut it in HALF), but we need to get this down more.

Reading type of leisure activity fell by 75% because nothing about 2022 was relaxing or calm enough to sit down with a book. But we have so many books I want to read! We’re going to start our creative intervals every day after work again to resume this one. 10 min draw, 10 min read, 10 min write is literally 1% of our day. That’s nothing at all.

writing held its own surprisingly.

I’ll do another post about goals after a few song analysis parts are revealed.

To stick to a habit do ‘in a row’ [Lesson confirmed in 2021]

Like running, flossing became easier once I decided to try to do it as many times in a row as possible without breaking the chain. 

There is just something about accumulating a bunch of successes in a row that makes you not want to give up.  I made it to 447(?) (there is a pic of this on the goal entry) before I legitimately forgot to do it and broke the chain accidently. 

I had alarm set to go off daily.  But if it went off at an inconvenient time I could snooze it.  At bed time I checked all my alarms and made sure to do them and dismissed everything.  In the morning, I pulled down the alarms, and tucked up out of view was “floss.”  Damn.  I just plain forgot, then didn’t see it…

And once there is a break in the chain it’s harder to get back in the habit, because it’s a fail. So without the chain holding my goal together, I skipped other occasional days after that. But not too many, because it’s SUPER-scary not going to the dentist for literal years.

But also I don’t want Covid about it. And it just seems very high risk to sit in an unventilated room with my mouth wide open for a long period of time, splashing water, and a strangers (or 2) hands in my mouth. Especially not knowing the hygienist, dentist, receptionist, other patient true vaccine statuses.

So I’m back on the flossing wagon.

How to Alleviate Sleepiness (better) [Lessons from 2021]

-water alleviates tiredness more than caffeine

-a walk helps get rid of sleepiness

Sounds like something some health-nut would tell you.  Believe me, despite all the things I’ve listed here that may seem extreme–I am not really healthy, and it’s NOT my focus. It’s just that little repeated efforts really do add up.

I live in a desert so water is crucial. The air is dry, and it gets pretty hot. Plus any exercise, sweating, sugar, salt, caffeine further depletes hydration. So I always try to drink water throughout the day. And it is true-being hydrated feels like having more energy.  Caffeine just made me jittery or more irritable.  Water, I’m talking a LOT of extra water, does help.  But like, a lot.  Like 30 cups by lunch.  And you actually legitimately feel better. 

I suggest working up to it. And I’m telling you getting 4 cups a day is the biggest hurdle when you haven’t really been mindful. Because drinking extra will make you pee extra. And you just don’t feel thirsty. I know. But if you can just make a habit of getting 4 cups of water in the earliest possible in the day–any above and beyond that are really not a big deal. I don’t know why. I don’t make the rules.

Also, aside from water, taking vitamin B helps energy. That’s why they put so much of it in energy drinks. And vitamin B without all the caffeine won’t dehydrate you, which actually makes you feel more tired (think hangovers). So vit B in the morning, and at that afternoon slump. Best part about that, it’s not going to keep you up all night like a late coffee/tea might.

Another thing that helped us feel less tired is another counterintuitive thing. Walking on lunch and after work.  It was way more helpful than sitting, which actually made us feel more tired.  So get that heart rate up next time you’re sleepy and wishing for a nap during the work day!

And you know what I found out makes me most tired of all?  Living in an extrovert’s world.  I used to be exhausted on most work days when we had to go to the building (vs. working from home).  Just the anxiety of second-guessing every facial expression, how fast I was walking, each interaction was tiring.  Now that I’m at home working after work I just feel normal.  I don’t get tired for several more hours.

I’m still working on energy though. I’m often very tired and dragging a$$, so any other tips would be helpful.

Writing [Lessons from 2021]

-I get excited to write then lose motivation & traction before I finish the writing piece.

I think it’s bc I get discouraged about the writing phases behind the scenes that don’t get published.

It’s the logistics I don’t care for.  I wanna write the thing I’m enthusiastic about, but you have to lay the groundwork, give all the necessary background info, explain where and who, site sources, edit, and by the time I’ve done all that it’s a slog, and I’m onto some other exciting subject.

I think it’s a matter of training my brain.  Which is what I’m currently doing.  I’m going to try to write daily, just to get into the habit of sitting still, not looking at the television, social media, and reconnecting to the writing process.  Once I am OK with the sitting and attending to writing, I’m going to try to publish a daily post.  Then, it’s in the in-a-row territory that works so well for me.

I still need to finish my TNR series, and I need to finish the Diatlov (however you spell it) Pass theory, and finally, I have a lot of song analyses on the back burner. And I’m excited about all of those. Maybe I need to go back to whatever inspired each writing in the first place to get re-motivated.

I can Google this too, and see what suggestions are out there…

Reading [Lessons from 2021]

I got stuck reading a very technical book last year. But I didn’t want to start a new one, because I DO want to read that book.

I’m afraid to start a book while I’m in the middle of one.

What if I start a second book and get confused what was happening in the first book? Or or the characters are? Or some subtle detail that matters?

Or what if starting a second book while reading another book makes both books blend in my mind, and I don’t remember what is going on in either of them?

If I start a second book before I’ve completed the last, maybe I won’t ever finish the first book.

What if reading two books simultaneously, takes even longer?

I don’t know how to read two books at a time, you can see.

But I don’t want to get stuck on one book again this year. I would like to read every day. So I feel like I need to make some kind of rules so I don’t leave that first book unfinished.  It’s a whole thing.  Maybe I’ll leave the first book out until I finish it?

Does anyone else read multiple books at a time, and have any insight? I guess also I could Google this…

How I Did on 2020 Goals/Resolutions

In 2021, I felt like things should be at baseline again, but they were not.  The pandemic wasn’t over.  Work was kinda fucked up most of the time.  So most of the goals fell apart.  Can I tell you how much I love the Daylio app for being able to track everything and have actual statistics rather than just a general guesstimate of progress?!

-kept up on in-a-row runs

Today, 1/3/22, I have run 8 years and 2 days in a row.

-continued making a weekly menu, grocery list, and sticking to that at the store.  And shopping at Winco.

Our community spread is high and vaccination rate is low so it’s not too safe to go inside of a grocery store.  We got groceries delivered (at great expense) all year.  And because it was such an odd year with so much grocery and restaurant delivery, we really didn’t do the menu either.

-Continued to put on makeup and fix my hair every day for work.  

In a pandemic there’s really no need for this.  For the first time in my adult life, I didn’t even shampoo my hair daily.  And I felt OK about it.  What a colossal waste of time.  I don’t think I’m going to go back to primping on the daily like I used to.  What for?

-Drink 12 cups of water a day.

We did pretty well with this.  It’s hot mostly.  We exercise a lot.  I tend to get headaches if I don’t hydrate enough so that’s a motivator too.

-went to the doctor.

Video appointments!  How do we keep these forever?!  It’s tons less of a hassle than physically going to see a doctor.

-dentist twice a year.

I am freaking out.  I think opening your mouth in an unventilated room for an extended time is one of the riskier things you could do during a pandemic.  And I looked on Yelp for a dentist who takes Covid precautions.  They have a filter for dentists with all their staff vaccinated.  No matches in my state!  Yelp also has a filter to see dentists that require all patients to be fully vaccinated…  None in my state.  IDK if the filters didn’t have the info or if in fact there is none.  But I’m not going to chance it.

-Floss daily.

Since it is not at all optimal to skip the dentist for this long, I have started flossing diligently.  I don’t want to get Covid, but I also don’t want to lose my teeth prematurely.  I think this is actually the worst situation for me in the whole pandemic.  It’s just not good choices…

-workout at least 5 days a week.

Aside from running a mile every day, we also lift weights 6 days a week.  On tired Thursday we get a break to elliptical or bike instead of lifting.  It’s easier to get all of this done in the morning prior to work when we’re not so tired.  For awhile, we were also able to do planks and crunchies on all 3 of our work breaks every week day.  And lately, we walk every day at lunch time, and again after work–just to get some steps in.

-cook at home and meal prep on weekends to make the week easier.

Fail.  Complete fail.  And now we have to get off the restaurants and just try to cook at all again.

-pay off the Visa. 

I submitted double the minimum every month, but there is still money on it.  But it’s a work in progress.  It wasn’t for lack of trying.

-read.

Failed.  I mean, I read articles on my phone, and reddit, and blogs, and twitter.  But books were a fail.  I started off with very technical long book, then slogged through it.  This next year I’m going to try to read multiple books at a time so I don’t get stuck like this.

Ok, so all of that.  And in 2020:

Save money for a car before November.

So we saved enough money for a car, but then it wasn’t super-safe of a proposition to test drive stranger’s cars.  So we’re waiting for the pandemic to wane a bit before taking a risk.  Also, we’re still able to work from home, get prescriptions mailed to the house, and get groceries via delivery, so there’s not as much need for both of us to have a car.

More time for creative endeavors.

Spend 1% of waking hours doing each thing.  We’re setting the interval timer app to do 4 times of 10 minutes.  Each 10 min segment works out to 0.9% of our waking hours.  So even though I get antsy and feel like I need to be doing something “important” it is so much easier to think of it as a small portion of my day.  Makes it more manageable.  I think as we get in the groove, we can add more activities or lengthen time spent, but one thing at a time.  I just want to make a habit of including creativity into every day.  This went well in the beginning of the year, but as the harassment ramped up at my job, I couldn’t concentrate to do other things.  My head space was taken up by ruminations, or me planning what to say/do, or I kept lapsing into anger/sadness about the situation.

So between pandemic and work harassment, my goals were pretty much busted.  Except for the run and workout.  But this next year should be a little better.

Hitting the Wall: Tips for Finishing the Running Distance

You set out to run a mile. Not 3 laps, not 6 min. ONE mile. But your body (or is it your mind?) is fighting with your goal. You feel tired. You are breathing ragged, and starting to collapse. Every second is horrible. You want to quit.

DON’T!

I mean, unless you have a medical situation (check with your Dr. before engaging in physical activity).

Aside from that–you can do it. You’d be surprised at what your body can handle if you’re mind would just get on board. I mean, watch this survival show, “I Shouldn’t be Alive” at some point. You’ll see what humans can tolerate. You can handle this, and you should train your brain that pushing your limits isn’t quitting time.

But how to go about it?

In the long term, remember why you started running in the first place. You had your reasons. Now think about them. Quitting early gives you a fraction of the benefits too. One of my favorite quotes is “If you’re not going to go hard, why go at all?” which hits on the point I’m trying to make. You set a goal–now do the whole thing. Why bother if you’re not going to do it right?

Have your poster with all your motivational quotes that we talked about making before and hang it where you run (or look at it right before you leave). Refer to it often.

Now to the tricky stuff. Train. Your. Brain. Teach your mind to get comfortable with a little discomfort. Again, I’m not talking torn ACL and asthma attacks here. Regular tiredness and fatigue should be something you can work through.

Don’t fixate on the distance that’s left or your speed or other metrics if you wanna stop. It just turns tortuous and slow. Instead, think of your mantra, turn on your most hyped up power song, sing in your head. Distract!

Then, do some physical adjustments. Because when you get tired your form suffers and ironically, bad form takes MORE energy. You want to be as efficient as possible. Also, you know how you have to concentrate on having good form, so you hardly do it bc it’s so effortful? Now is the perfect time. We need to distract the mind from complaining and make our body more efficient. Go through a checklist and do it over and over. This also has the bonus of helping your running form in the long term!

Think about relaxing the cheecks on your face. They should be bouncing with every step.

Is your neck tight? Concentrate on relaxing it.

Relax your shoulders too.

Look up (more than you think you need to). It should feel exaggerated. When you get tired you start to hunch and crunch downward–very inefficient of a posture.

Your shoulders should be back so your lungs can be open. I attempt to push my lower back forward in order to open my lungs more. Your face feels up to the sky, now think about pointing your heart to the sky as well. Carebear stare, anyone?! This will also feel exaggerated, but it’s just normal form. I promise, your body feels crazy, but it’s actually just upright again.

Hardly anyone has good arms when running. It takes loads of concentration to get it right–perfect for this situation! Relax the hands. Stiff, tight fists make for stiff tight everything–not what you’re going for. Position of the hands doesn’t matter as much as relaxation. Seriously, you don’t want to be tight and stiff anywhere when you run. Next, make sure it’s your upper arm that’s creating the swing (not like a drumming motion of your forearms). Next, actually USE those arms to propel you. The energy between your arms and legs should be more equally divided. Most people are just forcing their lower body to do ALL the work. I think about my hand/arm going from my “holster” near the back of my waist to my shoulder-level in front. It’s a pretty big swing. And the elbows should be in, toward the body. Honestly, look up something online about good arms and follow it. Things get very technical, and everyone could use improvement.

Do your shoulders and pelvis line up? No twisting. Make sure they’re squared and facing forward. Knees too. Line everything up. When you’re tired, your legs might start doing wonky stuff, and this isn’t great for speed/endurance–but it can really cause long term damage.

Lengthen your stride. I think about letting my back foot trail more. Your steps should be long so you take less of them.

Play with stride length. I read somewhere that if short quick steps have you tired, that switching to long strides uses a different set of (less fatigued) muscles. I don’t know if it’s perfectly true, but at the very least it’s an additional thing to distract you from being tired. Try tiny, fast steps or alternate to long, slow strides.

Lastly, consider running faster. It sounds crazy when you’re tired and want to stop, but if you go faster you’ll finish the distance sooner! And often if you speed up you’re thinking so much about just staying upright, that you don’t have time to agonize.

Basically, distract your mind and focus on your form. You can do it-if I can do it, so can you!

Being Accountable for Your Workout: Tips & Tricks for Keeping it Going

Write firm goals. Post them so other people know. Put them up where you can see them.

OK you’ve made your goal and you’re maximally motivated. Let’s get real for a second. On those off-days, the stressful busy days, when your sick–what is the bare minimum of your goal to still keep it alive, but also slack off a teeny bit. Decide a minimum per day that’s acceptable. Probably make this decision after you’re out of the out-of-shape phase, when you know what your maintenance-level is. And hold yourself to it! Nothing less. But try not to use it either, if you can help it. This is reserved for emergency bad days.

Send check-ins to someone else. You can do it on social media or a phone call (and in person once you’re vaccinated for Covid-19, but not before that). Do it immediately after your workout, so your rosy, sweaty face is proof. But check in, tell another person (truthfully and accurately) what you did, and keep up on this. On the days you feel lazy or cheat-y, you should think if what you’ll have to tell this other person. And it should properly motivate you to just get it done. And don’t lie or be sketchy–you’re only cheating yourself!

Don’t rush the results. Impatience can kill a workout. You’ve been working your ass off! You pushed too hard past the out of shape phase, worked out every day even when you were tired or just wanted to screen instead. But why is that number on the scale not budging? It’s not fair! This is the time a lot of people get discouraged and quit. But don’t. This is a time you need to remember WHY you made this goal in the first place. Look at your written goal. Think or write the reasons success of that goal will make you feel better and be happier.

Write a motivational poster. It’s time to write down what motivates you. You want to wear a bikini. You need to keep up with your hyper-puppy on your dog walks. You want to take the 3 flights of stairs at work instead of taking the covid-ater. What do you want in the long term out of this goal? Write those things where you can see them. Then go online (I like Pintrest for it) and find your favorite motivational quotes. Make a poster with like 12 things and put it where you work out. When you want to skip-read it. When you’re tired of running have a pic of it on your phone. When you’re struggling through that last set, look at it as you lift.

NEW YORK, NY – JULY 12: (L-R) Victoria’s Secret models Candice Swanepoel, Alessandra Ambrosio, Erin Heatherton, Lindsay Ellingson, and Lily Aldridge attend the Victoria’s Secret Supermodel cycle to benefit cancer at SoulCycle Tribeca on July 12, 2011 in New York City. (Photo by Mike Coppola/Getty Images)

Don’t justify bad behavior, get real with yourself. I mean, your mind can make all sorts of justifications and excuses. But your body is keeping track of exactly what you are doing–accurately. Don’t let a disconnect happy. Be absolutely honest with yourself. Because you only hurt your own progress if you don’t.

Give yourself pre-planned breaks. For a holiday, or off day. Know which days those are, and do your minimum.

Don’t do too much too fast. You’ll burn out. Or get injured. The big challenge is to do this LONG TERM. This is a lifestyle, that’s the only way you will lose weight and keep it off. So whatever you do has to be sustainable over time.

Make it easy on you. Not a social butterfly–don’t sign up for those zumba classes. Get bored easily? Don’t buy a treadmill. Not a morning person? Don’t say you’ll wake up at 5 AM to do an exercise video. Work with you, as you are–not as you wish you would be. Figure out when your highest energy level during the day is, what you will do, and cater to that. Because if you go against your nature, you’re setting yourself up for failure.

Do it 1st thing in the morning. Go to bed earlier so you can be rested to get it done first thing. Get up and do it. It’ll be done, and one of the sayings we use nearly EVERY day is: Another run done–feels good when it’s over.

Just get it done procrastination makes it feel worse. I’m talking through experience-it’s worse if you don’t just do it and get it done. The later I waited, the LESS I wanted to do it. I had eaten and couldn’t comfortably do it. Things came up. I just wanted to relax… But there was this guilt and regret about not wanting to skip it. Seriously, on the days you don’t want to do it–those are the days to make sure to get it done as soon as possible. Do it sooner. Then you’re free! If you wait, it’s hanging over your head.

Don’t Beat Yourself, Don’t Beat Yourself Up

Once your passed that out-of-shape phase (see my previous 4 posts about that) the biggest enemy to your fitness is. . . Your own mind. It’s amazing what our bodies can handle! Moms who pull their child out from under a school bus? Athletes with no legs running track? (just think about the determination here, not the murder). People that survive famine? We can do so much more than we give ourselves credit for, it’s usually our own minds that stop us.

Find a balance. Don’t talk to yourself like an enemy would. Love yourself. But also, don’t be too soft on you that you lazy out.

You have to want it.

Nobody is going to do this for you. If you don’t lose weight (or whatever your fitness goal is) nobody loses out but you if you don’t achieve it. So stop blaming. Stop cheating. Want it. Own it. Work it. Emphasis on work.

You have to want it for the right reasons.

If you’re trying to lose weight to impress your boyfriend, show up classmates at a high school reunion, or be the hottie at the beach–well, it’s not a sustainable outlook/goal. What happens when you break up with that douche giving you poor self-image? Or after the reunion? Or during winter? You have to love you and want you to feel good and live longer. And the superficial benefits are great, but those aren’t gonna get you off the couch when you’re tired and sore. Ultimately, you have to be trying to get fit for you.

Have reasonable goals and expectations.

Don’t try to train for a marathon in a month. Don’t make a goal of losing 30 pounds in a year. Make, small, reasonable, attainable goals. Instead of trying to pole vault to your goal, take the stairs. Or a ramp. And check in on yourself. If something isn’t working figure out why. Then amend your routine to account for that. Example: We used to skip our strength workout at least once a week if not more. Despite really wanting to do it, and feeling better and stronger when it was accomplished. The reason? After work I’m fatigued/tired. I don’t want to do logistics after I’m off. So we started waking up earlier and getting the workout done first thing in the morning before I’ve become fatigued from working an entire day. And we haven’t skipped since. When you achieve the first goal, make a next goal. Progress through your goals.

Make a reasonable timeline.

Make the attainable goal, and put a timeline on it or it’s just a wish. But the timeline must make sense for YOU. If you go too big, you’re bound to get discouraged and quit. So really look at your past behavior and decide what you can and will actually do.

Be real and honest with yourself.

*This really is a key. For example, people who keep a food journal chronically UNDER-estimate how much food they eat. Or round down. Or don’t count a rice cake bc it’s just a small snack. That kind of thing. But here’s the bummer, even if you low-ball and round down your calories–your body will always count them exactly accurately. We don’t try to lie to ourselves, but that’s what’s happening.

And with exercise, we OVER-estimate how much, how intense, and the number of calories burned. Did you know 1 beer averages about 200 calories and many Starbucks grande average 400 calories, while running an 8 min mile burns approx (depending on body weight & other factors) 70 calories? It’s not fair, but keep it in mind.

So try your very best to be accurate, b/c your body always is. And that disconnect between underestimating what goes in and overestimating what is worked off, leads to disappointment. Be as realistic and rational as possible when evaluating your own fitness.

Don’t make excuses and justifications.

Along that same track, be accountable for your goals. When you write down your attainable goals with its end date, also write what the bare minimum to still keep this goal can be. Example: I have not broken the chain for running in SEVEN years. I have been sick some days, stressed, busy, moving to new apartments/states, on vacation (where bears were frequenting), hurt with broken ribs, and LAZY. So of course every day is not my A-game. And that’s OK, expect bad days. But make a backup (emphasis to be used in emergency situations only) for those off days. Write that down too. My bare minimum distance is at least 1 mile. And the least effort I can make that doesn’t break my goal is to run in place on the floor and I have to get the mile done mostly consecutively, like in at least 30 min. So, when I had a bad head cold with fever and couldn’t breathe and called out sick to work b/c I felt so bad? I stood on my floor and jogged in place for a half lap at a time (12.5m), stopped to rest and recuperate (I felt like shit!), then resumed in the same way until the mile was done. I think it took a little over 15 min to get it done, when my average mile is probably 9 min, and my goal mile is 7 min. But I got it done. And you can too. But plan for it. And stay exactly accountable to it.

And my pet peeve (especially for middle-aged and older people) is YARD WORK DOES NOT COUNT AS EXERCISE. You need to get your heart rate up for 20 consecutive minutes to get any benefit. So the yard work is great as an extra thing, but it is absolutely not the whole thing.

Don’t say all the things you can’t do, tell yourself all the things you can do to overcome limitations.

I am not saying ignore major health issues or tough out debilitating conditions here (consult your Dr., I am not a professional). I am suggesting that a lot of reasons for not doing something can be creatively neutralized or dealt with if you just change your thinking. There are a million excuses and reasons not to do exercise: You’re tired, your knees hurt, you have asthma, you don’t have good shoes, there is no time in your busy schedule, you have kids to take care of, you don’t have a place to do it, on and on and on and on…

OK, but why CAN you do it? How CAN you make this happen? Don’t waste your energy thinking about why you can’t, put that energy toward finding compromises and solutions. These legitimate reasons excuses are often just your mind dragging you down. Don’t let that be your headspace and go too negative. Get practical. Be a solutions generator: go to bed earlier/take vitamin B, lose some weight/modify/go slowly, get better or more medication/condition your cardiovascular/workout with an air purifier in the room, do a lower impact workout/go shoe shopping/borrow shoes, cut out some screen time/wake up earlier/get organized, involve your kids in your workout/trade off workout & childcare days with a friend, find a park/get a treadmill/go to a trail.

Don’t listen to your brain when it’s telling you that you can’t make it.

My brain is lazy. Especially when it comes to endurance exercises. It will shout, “slow down” “you’re tired” or
“you’re not going to make it” so loudly! But my body is often in good shape (remember reasonable goals) to do the thing we’ve (my body and mind) been working toward. I’m not saying to keep pushing if you’re actually going to injure yourself, but do push past mental blocks.

I suggest thinking of a mantra, like “I’ve got this” or memorizing a quote such as, “if you’re tired of starting over, stop quitting” or singing a song in your head. This distracts your brain from all the negative self-talk, and also conditions you to be a more optimistic person in the future.

As a lazy person myself, I hope these tips can help you achieve your fitness (and other) goals. At the very least–it doesn’t hurt to try something new, does it? Straddle the line between holding yourself accountable and being realistic. You are doing this to be a better you, not to impress other, not as punishment. Love yourself, push yourself. It’s Velveeta (I’m trying something here), but it’s also true.