Tag Archives: grades

Tough Anthem Song

20 Jul

I was naive, just wanted to please

I had that big dream, [softer, in the background] You embodied it

I didn’t have that opportun-ity,

kept get-ting dragged down

My fault, grades weren’t my only prior-ity

I was left hanging, my-life rearranging

Needed fam-iliar-ity

I came with baggage, you had it too

I realized too late your un-cer-tain-ty.

I was a buffer, no a-type-ah replace-ment

You left me absolutely nobody.

 

When I look in the mirror it

reflects my innermost spirit

spit the word “no” I won’t hear it

my motivations don’t fear it

 

Your harsh words made my skin thicker

Your head games made my mind quicker

Moved away from you– made my heart richer

Your cold shoulder showed I’m the vic-tor

You’re working that much harder, [softer, in the background] who’s the loser now?

 

You bruise me, you’ll never bust me

my mindset is such a tough one

Ignore the hate I’m so scrappy

Eat shit, I’m gonna be happy

 

all that sacrifice

and several rolls of the dice

Got me livin’ my best life

not exactly no more strife

but most of the days are mostly nice

 

 

 

My Beloved PJs

7 Oct

We call it “getting in the dress code” at home.  It means removing uncomfortable clothes, anything heavy, jeans/spandex, taking off bras and shoes–just getting cozy.  And it is maybe my favorite thing in the whole world.  Being in the dress code recharges my battery.  Without time at home to veg out, I feel tired and stressed.  Going out can be fun, but it’s also taxing.  I like a good trip, an outing, a festivity, but it’s an absolute must that rest time be built around that–or I’m a mess.

post surgery

As such, I hate days where I’m scheduled to be in multiple places, have to run from obligation to obligation, or those that keep me away from home for too long.  It wears me out.  And those kinds of days require planning.  You have to carry the right clothes and supplies with you, fix portable snacks, plan water so you’ll be near a bathroom when you need it.  It’s a real pain.

Today was like that.  I agreed to tutor again, had a test in class, then had to rush to meet a work friend for a bike ride.  Those events alone would have been enough, but strung together, I was really bummed out.  I wore my workout clothes, though I felt a little self-conscious at school.  I ate a big breakfast and remembered to bring along my thermos of water.  I packed my bike, my coat, my school things, wallet, sports arm wallet, etc, etc. . .  It was busy.

The tutoring went a little better–I took more control of the situation.  I moved us to the place I liked, asked my tutee the way they studied, took tests, etc, taking the focus off myself, and having to prove my worth as a tutor.  Instead of sharing answers or potential test questions, as my subject kept pressing for, I doled out study advice and test-taking tips.  My tutee–a brazen thing–tried to get me to give my old class notes over and “lend”  all my flashcards.  In my head, I was like “No FUCKING way are my materials leaving my site you lazy little shit!”  But aloud I suggested it would be studious in itself to formulate your own materials.  And recommended getting notes from an actual classmate–so they will be exactly the same.  I think since I took the reigns and didn’t let my subject run over the top of me again, things went a little better, and were more helpful.

Fall finals 123

My tutoring session was cut in half b/c my person scheduled another meeting in the middle and had to leave.  So I was at school with an hour and a half to kill.  I hate that!  Instead of wasting gas and going home, I just took my flashcards and walked the trail studying them.  It was a beautiful day and hot so that wasn’t the worst.  Except I got sweaty before my test.

*pet-peeve:  I can’t stand when I take the time to answer a personal question, sometimes even in writing–and the person I’m communicating with not only doesn’t remember what I said, doesn’t even remember that they should know the answer when they ask all over again.  It’s all I can do not to say–shoulda paid attention the first time.  Annoying.

I took my test, and had some uncertainties–like usual.  We grade them right after taking them, and while we were doing so I became STARVING!  I broke my string of 100% (3 in a row) by missing 3 vowels.  One was dialectual–“bag” sounds like it has a long a to me, but 2 I probably should have known.  I think the hunger and tiredness was at fault.  My concentration and mental abilities were not in top form that late in the day, and after much running around.  Damn.

After class, I of course was motivated to rush to the Y (one of 3 in town) to meet my friend b/c of my lateness phobia.  I knew I wouldn’t be able to bike or have fun if I didn’t eat though.  So despite having only 15 min to get all the way across town to North Y, I stopped at the crowded grocery store for a box of wheat thins.  Protein would have been better, but I had to grab something (quickly) that I could eat while I drove.  And I know right where those are and like them.  Plus, I was in a hurry.  I got there 8 min late–traffic was crap.  And I didn’t see him.  Maybe I was the early one because of traffic?  So I texted the number from the work phone tree 2-3 times, but heard nothing back.  Maybe he was driving and couldn’t text?  I struggled to unload my bike and jumped on it.  The tires felt drastically low–I guess I should have checked that before packing my bike.  Luckily, the bike came with a portable air pump when I bought it at the bike-swap so I went to work on them.  They still felt low, but maybe were better(?) when I jumped back on.  I guessed I could manage a short ride at least.  Except my friend still wasn’t there.  I have no watch and Rusty doesn’t have a clock, so I’m dependant on my FitBit.  Which happened to be on my foot to count my pedals, so it wasn’t that easy to fuss over time.  I just hung out–where usually I’d agonize over every minute ticking by.

Maybe I had an old or wrong phone number and he was somewhere in the parking lot waiting for me?  I rode my bike around looking for his truck.  I still didn’t see him.  Traffic had been pretty ugly and he lives near me, so he also had to go a long way in it, he was probably just caught up.  I looked at the surrounding trail, and figured I’d bike a little ways out, and just come back when he called or after awhile to check.  The trail was dirt and rocky and rugged.  I didn’t want an actual flat, and it felt very perilous like I could fall off at any time due to the slick sand, rocks, grooves, and sudden curves.  This was not the kind of ride I’d had in mind!  I walked my bike back up to the parking lot.

If I wasn’t going to ride while I waited I figured I had might as well study.  As I was sitting in my (hot) car, looking over my notes–it occurred to me maybe we were supposed to meet at the Valley Y, not North that I was at.  I wasn’t certain, but something in the very recesses tugged at my mind.  Did I go to the wrong location?  I doubted myself enough to decide I should go home now (at 5:17PM), because my friend was waiting for me at the other Y, wondering why I had stood him up.  Though I’m not positive that’s what happened.

So I never got to meet my friend and ride, nor could I contact him to find out the misunderstanding.  I drove all the way, and wasted all that time for nothing.  I might have had low blood sugar.  I guess just because I don’t have all the signs, doesn’t mean my mind is super-clear.  And now that I’m home I feel really tired and very fatigued, though I have a ton of things to study, and papers to write.

But at least I’m at home in my jammies 🙂

ugh.

I’m Focused, I’m Ready–I Can DO This!

19 Aug

OK, I wrote this 2 weeks ago, then thought it might be jinxy.  I’ve saved it since then, and a lot has changed.  I’ll add updated things (with an *) along side.

Here I go, I’m doing this!  Writing a bulleted (dashed, actually) post.

-I actually nailed my interview today.  The guy on the phone turned out to be no more than 22 years old and was a manager.  There was also a (regular?) man who was head of the division there.  I always feel like things should really fall into place and FEEL right, and somehow this didn’t.  The timing was weird, the first exchange awkward–so I didn’t have super-good feelings about it.  And since I felt like this wasn’t really meant to be I wasn’t nervous last night and this morning like I usually am.  This carried over to the pre-interview wait (usually terrible nerve-wracking) and surprisingly the interview itself.  It’s the first real  (veterinary shenanigans/work-interviews/and 1 question fast food not counted) interview that I feel great about.  The rest I either got really nervous or didn’t do a good job, or self-sabotaged b/c the job wasn’t right.  In this one I could tell both really liked me and I’m thinking I just may be offered the job.

*PS I found out 12 days later I got the job!

-Which, I know I could do a wonderful job for this organization so why wouldn’t they?  Not arrogance, but realism talking here.

*They even said so–it’s not just me.  What can I say, I’m a wonderful cleaner 😉

-I hesitate to write this in a public forum (before actually getting a firm offer), but the prospect of getting the job makes me a little nervous.  Just because I in no way want to overextend myself and lose my 4.0 GPA.  I have neuroanatomy this semester, you know.  Also, it may not leave me time to clean the vet hospital, tutoring at school, observing, or extra projects.  Which I have to decide how important any of those really are to me. . .

*The 2nd thing I did when I found out was write my boss to pick a time to meet so I could resign my cleaning position at the vet hospital.  Working til midnight, then getting up at 3-4AM, then going to school would just overextend me and I don’t want to set myself up for failure (or B’s even).

-Also, it would be evening/night hours and I am a decidedly morning person so I would have to flip-flop my whole routine.

*God, I stayed up til 9:30PM last night and I felt lie I was gonna die all day today.  And now I have the telltale sign of a sore throat that I’m trying to get sick (from lack of sleep).

-On the other hand, the organization is something I can get behind, the work is something I can readily do, it’s a national place so potential for keeping the job as I move state to state in the future is high, and the free membership would be exceptional.  Also, ability to buy things and to save money would be big perks.

-Fixing Rusty’s starter, buying my textbook, and maybe *crosses fingers* even buying a pair of boots would be really cool also.

* The FIRST thing I did when I found out was call the auto shop and make an appointment to get Rusty’s starter fixed and oil changed.  This has needed to happen since April, but I didn’t want to drop a chunk of change when I didn’t know when I would ean more.

-To alleviate my worries, I tried to make a potential schedule to see how much time I have and what my fall semester might be like.  But not knowing exactly how many hours, what days, or what blocks of time are acceptable, I quickly got stuck.  I estimated, but without the data it’s pretty meaningless.

*I asked for (and received) my hours concentrated on Friday and Saturday when I don’t have class.  This way I can recuperate before school and have time to study during the week.

-In other news, I tried to see how many steps I take in a mile.  It largely depended on my speed–faster I went, the shorter my stride length.  Which I hear is not ideal for increasing speed.  Science suggests increasing stride length and frequency of steps.  I’ll have to work on that.

*It depends on my speed.  BUT I have a post about the formula and my numbers coming up.

*My FitBit battery is so crazy/stupid that some days I want to throw the device in the river.  Even though when it works I love it.

-Oh, I almost forgot the point of telling you that last one:  I was looking of the science articles about stride length and speed, and I liked the conclusion one article came up with:  Ideally, you should both increase stride length and frequency of steps.  But most people have a hard time doing that, and favor one technique over the other.  This article said that you should know both.  Use one stride length at the beginning of your race, then when you become fatigued switch to the opposite.  What this does is work slightly different muscles–which aren’t fatigued.  This allows you to really give a kick at the end of your race.  This makes a lot of sense to me, and maybe I’ll try some things out to employ it.

-You also have to work out to increase strength (stride length), do drill work to increase neuromuscular connectivity speeds (faster turnover).  Instead of reaching forward to have a longer stride–which seems logical–push off harder with your feet, or ideally spend more time with both feet off the ground (an explosion of forward momentum).  As with everything, getting faster starts to have a lot to do with form, fitness, and physics = math.  I think to get more PRs though, I’m at this point.

-Our apartment is cheap and 4-5 on the vertical blinds broke off.  Upon close inspection the plastic hook broke into a n-shape, probably from all the heat, just dropping the blind out.  So I had to thread fishing line over the apparatus and tie it to the blinds.  I don’t think anyone will inspect them close enough to notice the difference.

*the fishing line blinds are still holding up nicely.  I think those are actually sturdier then the ones held with cheap plastic.  And I think the cheap plastic cooking in the sun is what wore the other ones out-lame.

-I went through the trouble:  1] to actually have closed blinds 2] to block heat in summer and drafts/cold in winter 3] to avoid a charge when we move out.

-It’s funny what I procrastinate about.  Making ice cream has been put off for over a week, even though I already did the difficult part and boiled the fruit into a syrup.  Painting my toe nails has been put off because I don’t want to remove the old polish.  It stinks and it requires scrubbing.  Making a new clogging dance for the talent show.  Because I can’t find a perfect song and only remember the steps I used in last year’s routine–this also needs to be a show-stopper!

*Finally, I buckled down and decided to finish the ice cream and lo and behold–when I pulled the bowl of mixture out from the freezer, the ice cream had made itself without my intervention!  Why can’t all procrastination items go this way?  I did remove the polish.  Which is creepy, and makes my teeth hurt.  And I re-painted them–but avoided glitter so it would be much easier to remove next time.

-I am getting SO excited about the Gorge!  I am looking up recipes, virgin drinks, and thinking about my setlist game, car-window paint and phrases, and a sign!  It’s gonna be a good, good time 😀

*We got car crayons and decided on slogans.  I cut up a box for a poster and we picked lyrics and made a model.  My setlist game is locked in.  Outfits picked.  I practiced one (of 2) hairstyles tonight and it worked out–though I need hairspray for those hairs I know are gray b/c og their unruliness.  We did the grocery shopping for all the snacks and bevs.  We even made banana bread (in the blender = genius!) and it’s in the freezer ready to grab.  I am super-excited.  These concerts have superseeded the first day of school, which is not right, but it’s happened.

-School–as I told my dad, I’m prepared, but not excited.  I mean who’s excited to lose their free time and begin studying every free moment?  Who’s excited to have to start to leave the house every day?  Who’s excited for stress?  I’m not insane.  But hopefully, my studying is so habitual and rehearsed by now that it will be much less of a big deal to do what I need to do.  Just one more semester here!

-My face is (still) breaking out like I’m going through puberty.  I use 2% sa. . .  chemical I forgot, not benz. . .  chemical I can’t remember, which dries out my face, but doesn’t stop the break outs.  The Sa. . .  is a little better, but I still regularly break out.  I am also on BCP for the last 4-5-6? months.  Maybe I should shower immediately after my workouts.  That might be a problem.  I’m sure my diet is also a problem, but that’s much more difficult to get motivated to change.

-I’m mad that I have to calculate my own GPA for my application.  Mad because they also make me send official transcripts–which cost money.  And I have to send them from 3 colleges, ramping up the headache (WSU already charged me twice for 1 set) and money (see previous parentheses).  I think they hire the dumbest, most belligerent people to handle the university fax machine–I always have trouble.

-I had specific questions about the GPA calculation that the school has to answer and that wasn’t on their info website.  So I e-mailed the address given on the admissions home page given to request information.  They did not address my questions at all, told me to refer to their website, and gave me a link to nowhere.  It was super-annoying, and I really had to stop myself from complaining for the lack of service–you never know who is in charge of your future.

*I had to make a phone call.  I did not like it.  All of my questions got answered and I calculated all my GPAs.

-I suppose it’s unprofessional to quit a job over Facebook, e-mail, text, or phone?  I would not be excited to go do it in person. . .  How about by letter?  I really do not want to do that–if it comes to that at all, I don’t know that it will.

*I wrote a Facebook message asking what the preferred mode of communication for the next 2 days would be.  I’m sure that gave away my intent right away.  Of course, my boss preferred a phone call.  I had to make a phone call.  I did not like it.  I resigned and the conversation was more pleasant and longer than I had anticipated.

-I have been researching textbook buy-back prices and will write a blog about when the best and worst times are.  With a graph!  Because I’m trying to hit the peak, I’m hesitant to sell my book back.  For fear it’s too early and the price will peak the next day/week/month.  As such, I still have my book that could give me a little income.  Also, the flaw in my plan is in order to find the peak, you have to see the downward progression that comes afterward–meaning I have to wait for the price to DROP again, to know (and miss) when the highest price was.

-I’m debating selling the mini fridge.  It’s really infuriating me by freezing or randomly thawing if the dial is breathed on.  It’s a royal pain to clean sticky, melty, smelly old stuff off a frozen bottom–and out from under the fridge.  Problem is, or freezer is really small and inept and doesn’t accommodate all the stuff we want.  BUT if I’m to sell/get a good price on the mini–this is the season to do it.  when all the students are setting up their dorms or wanting a kegerator.  After the decision, it’s also a labor-intensive job–which also has gone on my procrastination list.  Clean it, defrost it, write a nice ad, deal with FlakesList, and possibly help haul it out. . .

*I also stopped procrastinating and finally emptied the mini fridge.  We carried it to the balcony and let it defrost overnight.  I then bleached the $%ER out of it and washed all its contents.  While I did that I rearranged the kitchen (including 2 cupboards) to make more counter space.  Took forever and was tedious.  The fridge is in a new place getting cool as we speak.  It looks nicer in here, things make better logistical sense, and there is more space.  It was tedious. . .

-We watched the final season of the L-Word on Sunday.  I had seen the previous 5 seasons, but not this one.  So I’m a bad lesbian for not knowing who the heck killed Jenny and by being 10-12 (?) years behind the times.  I thought the season was consistent with the others.  I screamed at the immorality of the characters in the same way I always have.  The only difference I saw was before the intro song they had a scene in which each character in turn had a bad-scene with Jenny and subsequently said they wanted to kill her.  And I thought that was entertaining.  Also, despite liking the way Jenny provoked everyone and moved the plot along, I think that’s bad writing.  Every character should have at least one redeeming quality, and they didn’t leave Jenny with ANY.  But I loved to hate her anyway.

-SPOILER ALERT–the thing nobody liked was the way the network and show made “Who Killed Jenny” the central point in the entire last season–then left you in the dark at the end.  They never directly say.  I didn’t think the finale sucked though–I thought everything was as tied up as it could be.  One forum-respondant put it nicely when they said, “when acquaintances come in and out of our real lives, we don’t get updates.”  And another who said, “We are allowed an intimate view of this friend-group’s lives, yet we are not part of their inner group–the finale and secret of who, if anyone, killed Jenny is a reminder of that.”  Personally I think everyone had motive, but nobody actually did it.  I think she was always on the edge and committed suicide.

-PS–TV series writers it’s lame to leave an open ending on a finale as a segway to your next project–especially if that spin-off never comes to fruition.  Finish the one entirely–for the viewers–then move into the next thing.

-Do not watch “Don Juan.”  I thought it was horrible based on it’s treatment of women throughout.  Awful.

-I told myself to sleep in til 4AM since I had an interview at 10:45AM, but my body got up at 3:15AM anyway.  So now I’m very tired and as a result–unproductive.  Which I really hate.  I should either be able to sleep or do things I need to do.  It’s not fair of my body to be too tired to do the things, but not be able to sleep.

Is this long enough to be a decent real-time post?  I want to make up my slacking, readers!

*It is now certainly too long.  Enjoy the last 2 weeks of my life.

Scary Carl + Grades

15 Jun

We huddled together in my dark closet, apprehensive to make noise, and worried he would return and do something worse. My roommate dialed 9-1-1 on her cellular phone and told the operator in a wavering tone of voice that our landlord had assailed us by kicking in the front door during a fit of rage. The operator got the address to our secluded my missouribasement apartment and assured us she would send help.

This was just the latest in a series of escalating acts of harassment since 2004 had begun. Preceding this, I heard a sound in the living room and walked out of the bedroom to see my erratic landlord had used his keys to let himself inside without prior notice, or even a knock. I still have no idea what he was planning to do that day, and I began to use my chain lock regularly because I did not want to find out.

A few long moments after our frantic emergency call, the police arrived. They were so Sarah, me, Eileen 2005astounded by the profound damage to the door and the frame that they took pictures. Though the landlord owned the property he had destroyed, he severed the chain lock, which had violated our reasonable expectation of privacy. While the police were collecting the evidence and writing their reports, the landlord came back to the house to “fix the door.” The police arrested him, but a few hours after his release from jail that same day, our implacable landlord antagonized us by shouting through the living room window. It was at that point my roommate went to stay with her boyfriend.

I had nowhere else to go with more than a month left on my lease, and fall finals were commencing in one week. I was fretful the arrest had inflamed our fractious landlord even more and he would come in while I was showering or sleeping and do terrible things. I locked the screen door and the front door; not that it mattered, as he had keys to both. Then I took further precaution by barricading myself inside using the futon. After one sleepless night, I went to get a restraining order against my landlord. I was granted an ex parte that kept him from setting foot on the property but still, I was overwrought. I figured a piece of paper would do little to stop my volatile landlord from terrorizing me.

MizzouThis atmosphere of paranoia and chaos was not conducive to studying. At the time, aside from being enervated from fear, I did not realize I had any recourse. I assumed since the University of Missouri was closing for winter break, there was no possibility of taking my finals later. I felt I had no choice but to muddle through my exams and hope for the best. In my restive state, I bombed every test I attempted, probably dropping my grade about a full letter in each class.

If something extraordinarily aberrant like that happened these days I would inform my professors in The Quad 2an attempt to get accommodation on my final exams. Alerting the university of my predicament would be my next step, as I vowed never again to be reticent with my school when I am in crises. I regret that my grades suffered during that trying time, but this disturbing incident taught me the life lesson of not taking my safety for granted and how to utilize the police, the courts, and the university system in place to help people with such dilemmas. In combination with my more formal lessons imparted from academia, this upsetting episode helped shape me into the strong, resilient person that I am today.

Why Class Group-Work Does Not Teach Teamwork

25 May

Here’s another old draft I stumbled upon.  I do dislike teamwork when my grade is on the line.  I want to earn my OWN grades.  It shouldn’t be influenced by the work ethic of other people.  And it should be left to chance–what group members you get.  Also, I shouldn’t have to do every aspect of a big project in order to get a good grade out of it.

I HATE group work!

jumbo turtleNo one ever asks me to join their group, so it’s always awkward to get into a group in the first place.  I only want to do my own work (which is of outstanding caliber *truth, not bragging*) not be humiliated when no one wants to include me in their team.  Then, IF I do find a group everyone in the group knows each other and wanted to work together except me, so that’s more awkwardness.

And, in class–who do you sit by?  Friends.  People sit by friends, or they end up getting to be friends because of location.  People that sit in front are older students or sight-impaired, or very studious, generally.  While those in the back are too cool for school and want to text and chatter during class.  So you get partnered up with like people anyway.

An example of a group project gone awry–not my fault:

MY group sat in a row.  The fifth girl in the row, was the writer, I was the first on the opposite side of the row.  And the Green Bluff 2 025three gals in between talked about their “juicing” diets.  The writer organized our paper by name (douchi) instead of just writing a half page and putting everyone’s name at the top.  Though I had written an answer for EVERY theory (when we were only supposed to address one) this writer wrote a literal sentience for my name.  She wrote a paragraph under each of her friends though they had contributed ZERO because of the juice diet discussion.  And under her own name, the writer wrote a half page.  Bitch.  So it was made to look like I was a slacker.

My worst group project ever–also not my fault:

My Farm Plan

pretty in pinkMy senior year at Mizzou everyone had to take a capstone course in their major.  Hog Production is what fit into my schedule–though I didn’t intend on working with hogs and had no strong interest in them.  Anyway, our semester project was to write this big, involved farm plan and present it.  All in a group of 4.  The big thing was that the plan had to utilize everything we learned in class AND be consistent   Meaning all 4 group members had to have the same set-up.  Before Thanksgiving break I e-mailed my group and told them I would be happy to edit their portions, as well as type them all in one document–as a pre-vet student I needed an A in every class, and this project was the biggest component of our grade.

None of my three group members had STARTED the semester-long farm plan at that point in late November!!!!  By turkeyNovember–with only a month left of class.  Hadn’t.  Even.  Started.  Now, what am I supposed to do about that?  So I wrote the prof. explaining the situation and asking what I should do.  He just assured me in all his years of doing this project the groups have always come together by the end.

So no help.

And sure enough, come grading time my (assigned) group members with senioritis and plans to work for their family farms in a week or so (ie not pre-vet and not concerned about one course grade) had not completed the farm plans, and the ones that had slapped it together.  So even though MY portion was worthy of an A (the prof even said that), as a group we got a C-!  When I complained to the prof I should not be graded based on other people’s caliber of work–he just said he had always graded them as groups for the 20-some years he had been doing this, and he had never before seen a group that didn’t come together as mine hadn’t. . .  I got a C in that class 😦  NOT fair.

So that’s a huge reason why I’m anti-group work.  And here’s a bad dream I had related to group work:

To dream that you are in a bus accident suggests that it is time for you to move away from a group setting and venture out on your own. You need to be more independent.

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Goose Song

8 May

Cool and I are always talking to, and especially singing to our cats.  I’ve told you about our language of dropped liquids (/l/ & /r//) and how sometimes our MeowEEZE sneaks out of our apartment into our conversations with real people.  And how we don’t really care about being crazy cat ladys.  There are worse things.

Sloppy's electric throw 1

Sloppy-Joe Cool’s song (she had many, but her name-sake song) was to the tune of Beethoven’s 5th:

Sloppy Joe Cool

Sloppy Joe Cool

Sloppy Joe Cool Sloppy Joe Cool Sloppy Joe Cool

Kitty!

 

Choco-Luv’s song also features her name prominently:

Choco-Luv Choco-Luv Choco-Luv Choco-Luv

Choco-Luv Choco-Luv Choco-Luvups

Hay Hay Hay!

 

But I think Goose’s song is a real master-piece.  We are constantly calling this kitty different names, depending on what he’s doing at the time–he’s often doing funny or ornery things so in accordance his song goes:

Goose 2012He’s a goose

He’s a man

He’s a coon

He’s a Cat

He’s a turkey, he’s a lion, he’s a mongoose

He’s a big cat

He’s a fat cat

but he’s a real good buddy

+/- (‘cept when he’s not)

 

I just wanted to share how fun our lives are because of our beloved pets.  In other news, I got my Audiometry final exam grade back today.  I got 98%!!!!!!!!  So my final course grade is a 97.4% A+.  I am so proud of that because I really buckled down and worked so hard for it.  Throughout the semester, but BIG-time at the end.  I’m especially happy about it because I was afraid after losing so many points on exam 3, intimidated by the test format/grading/demeanor of the instructor, and worried about losing my overall grade and all-important GPA.  And despite the pressure, I stepped up and pulled it out.

I want to make clear that the course content was not as conceptually challenging as many classes, though there was a lot of things to cover.  Classes that have been more difficult:  Math of any type, physics, biochem, chem lab, chemistry, nutrition, animal physiology, anatomy, genetics, and speech & hearing sciences to name the most notorious in my memory.  All the same, because of the instructor, it’s been one of my most hard-fought A’s I’ve ever ever gotten (behind Physics 2 b/c math used to be my nemesis and Biochem b/c it was conceptually challenging, had TONS of material, and involved a lot of rote memorization of vocab/cycles/structures).

Even though I don’t have (much of) a job, I think I’m going to treat myself with a new pair of boots.  Boots because they go on clearance in the spring when stores are trying to clear the large inventory and they are something I can use this winter and especially in Colorado.  Now, it’s time to celebrate!

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April Goal Accountability

27 Apr

I always underestimate April.  It’s always a busy, stressful month for me, because that’s when all the final projects are due, when all the papers have to be written, every class is wrapping things up–and FINALS.  So a quick run-down of April (a little early) because things are about to get more hectic before they get better.

Maintenance Goals (from 2013):

-floss daily:  Yes, I didn’t miss 1 day, but it hasn’t been as great as I’d like.

-drink water:  I drank 7 cups a day–and on certain occasions even did 8 or more!  It’s going well 🙂

-read for pleasure:  Bad.  I have been studying flashcards right before sleeping.

-weekly massage:  Terrible.  Things are so busy in April with the semester coming to a close.

-abstain from drinking:  Perfect.  How in the world did I used to have time to drink AND study?!

-study habits:  I missed 13 points on my last exam, which has made me terrified.  I had only missed 5 total points in the entire course (exams, labs, assignments) total prior to this, so missing more than double that in one fell swoop was a big blow.  I had studied for it with 90% of my whole heart though–the exam format just played upon my test anxiety.  I will not let that happen again–I will keep my A+ and 4.0 GPA.

January=fitness:  Today was day 116 of treadmilling at least 1 mile/day.  Often I did 2 miles.  We also started doing a weights video frequently.  I still overindulge with food, but my physique hasn’t suffered for it.

Feb=have gratitude; say nice things:  Neutral.  I’ve been too busy trying to keep my grades up to say anything at all!

March=straighten out sleep:  When Cool isn’t snoring, I sleep pretty well.

April=save $$$:  It’s easier not to spend money when I don’t have a job.  Saving it is another story.  Saving from where?  I’m just trying not to drop too low.

May=volunteer:  I helped with several projects this semester.  We still plan on looking into Habitat for Housing once my finals are over, and once it stops raining 24/7.

June=Cool:  We are working with her new medicine, working on sleep/motivation, and working SUPER-hard to help her drop weight.  Things are improving on all fronts.

July=my appearance:  Has gone by the wayside.  Suddenly school took up so much time!  I can’t imagine how horrible things would be if I was still working at Cat’s Meow.  I would have 100% lost my 4.0 GPA.

Aug=Worry Less, Thank more:  I’m trying to re-group after my test.  And I’m trying only to think about productive things instead of fretting.  I’m beginning to be a different person in this respect.  What I have FAILED on is my positivity jar.  I neglected it all month (last month too).

Sept=make a list, grocery shop, cook ahead:  Way, way better!  I found ZipList and it streamlined the process and made everything a lot less time-consuming.  The food stamps also help, because there’s money to GET the groceries!!!

Oct=don’t over-pluck:  Not a concern–I wouldn’t have had time if I wanted to.

Nov=Increase eye contact:  The kitties love when I look into their eyes  >^+^<

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My First Hearing Screening

3 Apr

The first I’ve administered I mean–I have probably taken part in school and stuff.  Though it must not have made much of an impact, because I don’t remember it at all.

KONICA MINOLTA DIGITAL CAMERASo I forgot about that elementary school slowing down traffic so much around 3PM! I got MAJOR lateness phobia because I didn’t get to my parking lot until 3:20!!!

 

And I’m so glad I chose the shorter slacks after all, because it was really wet & mucky and I would have had to dry clean the gray ones. But both my group members were in black slacks and black suit jackets! Damn them. But I was comfortable anyway.

And we got a senior grading us–luckily. I was so glad it wasn’t the professor! And she was really nice and was MORE confused then we were, and just let us sort of pick what we wanted to do! So that was good.

We did the child first and Jen picked to place headphones and gives directions to her own daughter so I got the easiest part–setting up and placing the chair. And when I placed the chair I sat down in it with the headphones to make sure they could raise their arm without getting tangled. So I raised my arms a couple of times, and I guess I did it in a funny way because everyone laughed. So that was cool and it broke the tension. We all got 100% on the first part.

Then we had the adult screen–and the other Jen chose to do all the questions and instructions on her own husband–so that was cool. But I couldn’t do the set-up again since I’d already done it, so I got to place the headphones and actually run the screening. So I put the headphones on properly.

I made sure my audiometer was set to all the right numbers and everything and pressed the signal so he could hear it. . . Maico MA-25 audmAnd he did NOT raise his hand! So it was already an instant-referral. I was like oh no! Because you have to finish that test, reinstruct, re-do the headphones, and it could be a total refer that finds hearing loss. Also–I was like–what if the headphones or machine are somehow WRONG???!

My hands started shaking and I was freaking out inside. Also, I was really sweating profusly because of the lateness-phobia nerves, into the being graded adrenaline, into the WHAT’S GOING ON-panic mode I was in.  So I did the 2nd tone–and NO response. No!!!!!!!! I did the 3rd and he finally raised his hand. So I thought–good at east we know things are set up ok. I switched ears and got confused. He responded and didn’t respond on THAT side too. And I was freaking out so much that I wasn’t writing the responses down immediately, so I couldn’t exactly remember which ones he responded to and didn’t–so at the end I just quickly jotted down R NR NR. But either that was how he had responded or our senior hadn’t been paying attention either, becuase she didn’t mark me off on that.

So then I had to take the headphones off and re-instruct–which I’m sure he was like–what is going on? I got it! Then I had to RE-DO the whole sequence. And luckily he responded to all 6 tones that time. I was so relieved!

And when it was all over my group and the senior was like–good job! You did so good with that! I don’t know why he didn’t hear those! So we talked and laughed and everyone was happy. And we got 100% on that too.

And we got to leave. As I was walking out I looked at my watch–only 10 minutes had passed! It went so fast!!! And I started to look if there was any observations starting at 4PM. You have to look on all our professor’s doors. I looked at the first door, and none started til next week. The second door didn’t have a sheet. Then, I got close to the 3rd door–and noticed the BITCH was right inside–and I didn’t wanna sign up with her, or hang around the hallway any longer because I would eventually have to address her–so I just hustled out of there.

greekAnd I went Hamilton so I could stop by safeway and get some B&J, but when I finally, slowly got up there–Safeway was packed so I was like eff that. So I guess I’ll have to have some fruit dip–and cry.

So that was the whole thing! Oh and in more bad news, the senior warned us we have to do this again, but with the threshold, which is more in depth. And last year they did it individually with our professor grading–so hopefully that’s not the case this year

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Legit Tutor–Hold the Stigma

12 Mar

CV 11I made an appointment with my advisor (about a month ago now?) to work on my curriculum vitae (CV).  I had no idea where to start, as I’d always worked with a resume–and veterinary applications had their own forms.  Anyway, I quickly found out that I don’t have a heck of a lot to write on my CV–given my huge amount of veterinary-oriented activities in my past/present.  Which I can hardly use for the academic-centered document.

Anyway, so my advisor and I were trying to devise a way to flesh out my CV, because it IS early enough that I can do things now to improve my situation.  Which was a partial factor in quitting my job.  I need Speech & Hearing Sciences, no more veterinary.  A relatively quick way to put something in there is to teach others.  I have taught clogging dance, done private dance lessons, and “tutored” privately for cheerleading, but none of those things count either–I need something completely academic.  But the schools are pretty hard-core here so you can’t just be a classroom helper or something without formal documents, a lot of hoop-jumping, and some investments.  But I CAN tutor within my program.  Which my advisor, my mom, and Cool thought I would be excellent at.

So I got a faculty recommendation, talked to the academic coordinator, signed all the employment papers with Riverpoint’s HR department, and had some (FREE) tutoring business cards printed up.  I have never been SO paranoid about a possible mis-spelling.  I am scared someone will take a business card and be like–you totally spelled cougar/tutoring/Washington/*insert any word on the card* wrong!  Not an awesome prospect for someone who’s supposed to be able to help others with school!

I am all about helping others.  I HATE the competitive nature of some students/programs, and want a more collaborative feeling.  Because–I was tutored in chemistry and physics during undergrad and for my first Chem lab-not mineRiverpoint course, Speech-Sound Disorders.  And it proved invaluable!  My tutors (I had 6 different ones over my coursework) would answer questions, fill in gaps of learning, do practice problems with me, quiz me, help me with homework and labs, and tell me about the instructor or course expectations.  So I want to pay it forward.  Also, I have gotten A’s in all my classes, but not without a ton of effort.  So I feel like I have a lot to share about the course, instructor, the material, PLUS I kept all my study sheets and flashcards, as well as any papers, labs, quizzes, and exams.  I feel like someone could really benefit from just seeing how I learned the material.  And it’s cool, because I have taken a lot of these courses out of sequence, so my peers are currently in some courses I have previously taken.

I want to help someone, but I’m not sure how to garner tutees without being pushy, aggressive, or obnoxious.  I want to get the word out, but not put myself out there TOO much.  So it’s a fine line.  Also, I feel like I can’t write “tutoring” on my CV unless I actually work with a student at least once.  Even though I’m totally legit-employed by the university.  And I tried to get some friends to take me up on tutoring, just to have a client(s), so I can practice the required tutoring skills, and write it down.  BUT I came up against an obstacle I hadn’t anticipated:  Stigma.  I had not looked upon tutoring as a dominant-submissive relationship at all.  Because it wasn’t that way when I was being tutored.  But my friend DID.  And she indicated she doesn’t want to feel inept.  Which I hadn’t really expected either–when I was being tutored it was to get A’s–not because I was failing.

walk about day 2 003 copy

So that hurt my feelings, and gave me a reality check.  I need to somehow get word out that I’m a tutor now, AND convey that students with any letter grade/ability-level can benefit from someone with prior course experience.  So there’s that.  We’ll see how I can do.  Wish me luck in getting a tuttee!  I’m ready and excited!!!

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2013 Recap: Best Moments

31 Dec

I don’t want to make my followers crazy by publishing a super-overabundance of posts all the time.  So I had to choose today’s post carefully.  I decided on this all-important last day of the year, I would pick my top moments of 2013 to talk about.  I have so many looking back and looking forward type posts in que through.  I wrote my 2013 resolution results post, but it became very long, so I sperated it into the various sections.  Which made 5(?) posts.  And then, of course I have 2014 Resolutions.  And the music I listened to most in 2013.  But then I have the new 2013 album releases post.  And I want to make a big post about strategies of how I plan to go about accomplishing my 2014 goals.  Maybe I will make a New Year kind of post every day of the month in January.  Because that’s the way it’s looking.  I like it–I hope I doesn’t make you guys irate.  Anyway, without further adou, the very favorite of my moments in 2013, from 10th most important to super-best-time-ever-of-the-year!

10.  Keeping my 4.0 GPA in school.  Very important to me.  And not all that easy to do, so it garners a spot on the big list.  I only hope it will also be here next year too. . . pinna art

9.  Spa weekend & camping in the living room.  Grocery Outlet beauty/grooming items, massage, foot soaks, spa treatments, and healthful cooking.  Home spas are a heck of a lot less awkward with your mate and more affordable at home.  And camping included, sleeping on the air mattress in the living room, eating microwave s’mores, and watching “The Great Outdoors.”  A good time was had!  I had wanted to have theme weekends all summer, with varying items.  We made it to two before running out of ideas, then motivation.  But these 2 were so fun!  We saved money by staying home as well, which I always like.  I will try to start brainstorming now so we can have more this next summer.  I just thought of music.  And a crafty weekend.  There’s the first month for us. Summer Begins 2013 060

8.  Walla Walla big 30th Birthday.  I was really looking forward to this milestone birthday.  This one is probably due to the great anticipation and the weight I placed on this age.  It’s a big deal to me.  And I always love Walla Walla for the wine country and quaint small town feel–as well as the beautiful Palouse views.  The only reason this items fell relatively low on the list is Cool was mixed state, manic, or cycling (who can tell?) at the time and had no money and she acted like a jerkelsteilskin frequently because of the bipolar.  But I looked good, wasn’t at work, and got a true wine tour–so it was still pretty fun. Walla Walla 30th 022

7.  Seeing a moose up close.  Terribly exciting!  It came right in the yard while I was house-sitting for my boss.  And it ranks only 7th, because when it happened, I was worried the aggressing dog was about to DIE.  And on account of that I did not get a (good) picture. moose 1moose 6

6.  Green Bluff.  I think Peach-Fest was my favorite this year, though we got to go relatively frequently.  I like everything about Green Bluff.  The farm feel, picking/eating my own food, taking pictures, and supporting non-Monsanto produce.  It’s my favorite thing about Washington State (even beating the Fremont neighborhood, I think?!), and always a new adventure when we go.  Oh, wait–it couldn’t possibly beat Pike Place Market for WA fave, or adventure, but it’s the best thing Eastern, and a close second (because the Gorge isn’t as cheap or accessable = #3). Green Bluff 2 018

5.  Parasailing in CdL.  Wow!  We sort of did this one on a whim.  And it wasn’t what I expected at all.  No adrenaline was involved, just peace.  I got great pics, and had a really fun time with Cool.  It was really relaxing–until the dip at least!  I would do this one again any time, and I’ll never forget it.

tree and wake

 

4.  Labor Dave weekend, including the concert, tail-gating prior to entry, exploring mid-WA during the first half Selfie Columbia Riverof the day, hiking down to the Columbia River, camping near Feathers, and playing theampitheatre 4 setlist game with Cool.  The whole thing was fun, and I really like that it wasn’t just about drinking, or even music.  We spent a large majority of the day just appreciating the nature of mid-Washington.  Everyone was in a good (and stable) mood and that’s the best.  I love this concert and the time spent with Cool so much.  It’s totally OUR thing.  But next year–SEATS.  There will be no more GA at Dave for us.

 

3.  Clogging at my school’s Talent Show.  Who knew I missed dancing so much?  The thing that made this so great was the fact it was all mine.  I picked the song.  I wrote the dance.  And I rocked the performance.  I felt really great about the whole thing, and am excited to choreograph my next dances when time allows.  Winter break is for getting ahead with textbook reading, scholarship and application tasks, taxes/FAFSA, shopping for a semester, and winter cleaning/organizing.  See what I mean?  Four and a half weeks SOUNDS long, but there’s not enough time.  But when I do, I will be sure to do some more clogging dances.

2.  Bringing Goose home.  Not the actual hotel stay though.  Being sleep-deprived is never my favorite–though Fall finals 118Boise--May 2013 018seeing Boise with my parents and Cool was extra fun (even tired).  So finally!  I get to have all my buddies in the same state.  I missed him very much, and worried.  Also, this little item improved my relationship with my parents exponentially.  I am enjoying having happiness and closeness with them again–I missed that too.  And Goose is beautiful inside and out.  He’s home ❤

1.  Hands down–getting Forster-Fridays “off” of work.  I just can’t convey what a relief this is to me.  So much weight/stress/anxiety was lifted from me when this happened.  I feel so much more uplifted, positive, and hopeful!  Even though I didn’t believe it would actually happen or stick, and even though the social fall out was. . .  Special.  I love being away from that horrid day (most of it–I’m still there for 3-4 hours) even at the cost of having ALL early mornings, daily tiredness, and being locked in this city.  Still, totally worth it.  This is the item that really enables me to quit drinking.  I love my new schedule more then anyone could know.  I would write/say a big thank you to my boss if it wasn’t poking the bear, or jinxing it. It was sort of a chilled out year, but still good.

DMB Gorge 2008

I think I learned that you don’t have to spend a lot of money or take a lot of time away from work to have excellent moments.  I think 2014 will continue along that train of thought:  I have to work all day on my birthday, and Walla Walla is out of the question.  But maybe my parents will follow-though on visiting us, and that’s always a good time.  There will be the big, super-special yearly event of Labor Dave Weekend (with seats!), plenty of Green Bluff, and maybe a trip to The German (if we’re lucky), but other then that, we’ll make our own good times.  Even if it means being HERE for another year.