Long limbs and frozen swims/You’d always go past where our feet could touch
And I complained the whole way there/The car ride back and up the stairs
I should’ve asked you questions/I should’ve asked you how to be/Asked you to write it down for me/Should’ve kept every grocery store receipt
‘Cause every scrap of you would be taken from me
So now, back to the subtext of Taylor Swift’s Marjorie:
it relates to how Taylor could be afraid to come out of the closet. Or she’s fearful of taking Kaylor to the next level by having a child with Karlie.
Taylor could be wanting proof of a lot of things, here.
I wonder if she feels like Karlie is erasing their relationship and Taylor feels gaslighted. Taylor wants to prove that Kaylor was real and mutual since Karlie is insinuating it’s always just been Jo$h. Kaylor was secret so it’s easily treated as if it never happened at all.
And finally, Taylor mentions scraps. And there is a direct link between scraps, the fashion industry, to Karlie.
The Logistics (skip if you don’t care about math or the quantitative process):
I only judged good and up ranked songs this year. I threw out OK, meh, and skip bc with streaming those will no longer get listened to. Also, I did a percent of good and up songs per number on the album. Because just stacking an album with garbage songs shouldn’t rank higher either. You have to have good, great awesome songs, no matter the number of tracks. I added the % of tracks that were good and above on the album to the score of the level (elite, A, Gr, G) for the final scores. Highest is best.
For the two bands that put their albums out in installments (Weezer and Young the Giant, Imagine Dragon doesn’t count because I already ranked their entire 1st installment last year) I am going to judge them separately, but also as one unit. So I’ll place each installment in their ranked position, but then I’ll also do a fifth entry for each band judging it as one album.
One last note: I went back and fourth on Brandi. She released some obvious Grammy reminder music this year. They are different versions of her 2021 album, but it’s still the same album pretty much. Other artists like the Indigo Girls have released a double album with rock on one disc and acoustic on the other. And the price point might have been a bit more expensive than just a single disc. But Brandi released her separately–to get more albums sold, acquire more streams, and remind everybody that last year’s album is Grammy nominated. But I think the acoustic version was even more expensive than my signed copy of the original album, and that plus the cheatee numbers game left a bad taste in my mouth. If it had not been one of my top-tier favorite artists of all time, I would have thrown the copycat album away and not bothered ranking it. But it’s Brandi, so I included it. And she’s amazing so of course it ranked high. But I counted it as a half number so as not to throw off the totally legit albums in the ranking. So there’s that, Brandi is making me messy. Again.
from lowest to highest:
40.
Vance Joy:41.67%+ 16.5 = 58.17 Final
5 of 12 total songs = 41.67%
3 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 2 Good 3
10.5+6 = 16.5
Missing Piece- sounds just like before. Catchy. Lyrically based. G-Gr.
Clarity- always upbeat and catchy. Visual. G.
Boardwalk- have a definite sound and stayed true to it. G.
Looking at me like that- sex song. Catchy. Devotional. G-Gr.
This one- Banjo is very welcome! G-Gr.
39.
Papa Roach:42.86%+ 20.5 = 63.36 Final
6 of 14 total songs = 42.86%
5 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 1 Good 3
17.5+3 = 20.5
Stand up- A bit screamy. Structured like Linkin park with scream/sing. Good pump up song for running. G-Gr
Liar- catchy. Rap-singing. Could be a skillet song. G-Gr.
Ego Trip- chorus is catchy. Staccato verse militarized. G-Gr
Unglued- the backing music is nice juxtaposition for more saccharine lyrics. G.
No apology – more lyrical. Still rocks. Emotive. Very early-otts. G-Gr.
I surrender – sounds a bit churchy. Quiet end is nice and makes you listen hard- impactful. G-Gr
38.
Bowling for Soup: 40%+22.5 = 66.5 Final
6 of 15 total songs = 40%
1 awesome 5; 2 Great 4; 1 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 2 Good 3
5+8+3.5+6 = 22.5
Greatest of All Time- self-aware. Funny. Upbeat . Gr.
I Wanna be Brad Pitt- I like all the name drops . G.
Hello Anxiety- it’s my song! G-Gr
June Carter Cash- catchy. Backing is very late 90s. G.
Killin em with kindness- I love how it’s in gangsta rap style saying something positive and uplifting on the chorus . The Harmonies and rounds sound good too. A.
After all these beers- a summation of their career. A drinking song. Great end to the album. The sing along makes it very pub. Gr
37=37
*exact tie
Harry Styles: 46.15%+21.5 = 67.65 Final
6 of 13 total tracks = 46.15%
2 Great 4; 3 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 1 Good 3
8+10.5+3 = 21.5
music for a sushi restaurant- some Prince sound mixed in. 70s vibe with backing singers. Unique sound with the talking to shout-singing. Brass? Gr.
Daylight- the moag is nice. Sticking to you is gross. G-Gr
Little Freak- more subtle moag. Poetic. Tells a story through imagery. Sounds like a heartbeat. Seems gay to me. G.
Daydreaming- big disco vibe. Catchy. Falsetto. Brass. Notes. Funk sound guitar gives it a 70s flair. G-Gr
Bring it on home to me- sounds like the platters. Choral backing. Don’t love the word slave in a love song. G-Gr.
You’re the First you’re the last my everything – Typical Frank. Backing is nice. G-Gr.
Smile- Disney. Was there some reboot? Very overwrought backing instruments and singing. Note! Gr.
36.
Pussy Riot:57.14%+ 15 = 72.14 Final
4 of 7 total songs = 57.14%
3 Great 4; 1 Good 3
12+3 = 15
Princess charming – sounds just like Brittany. I like turning stereotypes on their head- def empowomsn, pride, lesbian lists. Catchy. Gr.
Horny- I don’t understand this Asian mini mouse voice? G.
Sugar mommy- this beat is the shit! And combined with a circusy sound it’s one of my faves of the year. Good for exercise. Hate the mommy shit tho- yuck! Another turning stereotypes on their head, so to speak. Lyrics are cringe but backing fire. Gr.
Poof bitch- the rap/beat is so good . Hyper. Don’t love the robot rap but the backing gets me hyped! Gr.
35.
The Wrecks:54.54% +24 = 78.54 Final
6 of 11 total songs = 54.54%
1 A-Gr cusp 4.5; 4 Great 4; 1 Gr-G cusp 3.5
4.5+16+3.5 = 24
I love this part- Dark, late 90s sound. Linkin Park+ Backstreet Boys. Always gets stuck in my head. Gr
Where are you now- Pausing and singing intensity used to good effect. Good beat pre- bridge. Gr.
Don’t be scared- Hollow echo sound. G-Gr
Unholy- catchy upbeat uplifting. Love the better than ever part. Keyboard backing sounds great. Touches of moag. Gr-A.
Dystopia- angstsy moody lyrically based. Base and guitar sound awesome at bridge. Dramatic. Jam crescendo at the end. Gr.
Ugly Side- Vance joy + plain white tees. Catchy. Gr.
34.
Hayley Kiyoko: 53.85% + 26 = 79.85 Final
7 of 13 total songs = 53.85%
1 awesome 5; 2 Great 4; 2 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 2 Good 3
5+8+7+6 = 26
Luna- catchy. G.
For the Girls- a little like a commercial song. Catchy. Fun howls. Open lesbian. G-Gr
Flicker Start- syncopation. Gr.
Forever- catchy. Romantic. Lesbian. G-Gr
Deep in the woods- sounds a bit like Aqua. G
Supposed to be- catchy. Nice strings at end. Gr.
Well…- catchy. Melody pause with beat and auto-tune. About an ex and feeling better than them. Petty. Fun electronic at the end. A.
33.
Thomas Rhett:53.33% + 30 = 83.33 Final
8 of 15 total songs = 53.33%
1 elite awesome 6; 1 Great 4; 4 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 2 Good 3
6+4+14+6 = 30
Church Boots- talking about staying down to Earth. G-Gr.
Anything cold- great tailgate song. Perfect happy, party song.
G-Gr
Angels- seems sincere. Nice harmony. G
Half of Me- one of the best songs of the year! Great drinking song. Cute and cheeky. Elite awesome.
Bring the Bar- a date at home. Low-key. Party for 2 take two. G.
Slow down summer- this song feels like ice tea on a porch and chillaxin. Nice orchestral touches in the backing. Cheeky. G-Gr.
Us someday- would make a good wedding song. Gr.
Somebody like me- a gal talking about having high standards. She wants a bf to treat her right. He thinks he could fulfill all of that. Strings peeking through are nice. G-Gr.
32.
Young the Giant:
Act III:75.00% + 9 = 84 Final (III only)
3 out of 4 total songs = 75.00%
3 Good 3
9
Dollar $tore- I don’t care for symbols and emojis in titles. This song was real slow, didn’t like the meditative Indian-sounding part. The end faster part salvaged this too long song. G.
Cult of Personality- I heard “tower” in the lyrics too. A Trump song? A mistake. G.
Dancing in the Rain- I’m finding that I only like the last 3rd of all these songs. They could all be chopped up into 2-3 songs and make a true album. Like the prior ones this one was too quiet, too slow, but the ending salvaged it. G.
31.
Young the Giant:
Act I: 75% + 9.5 = 84.5 (I only) (tie-break- no Greats vs Black Keys)
3 out of 4 total = 75%
1 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 2 Good 3
3.5+6 = 9.5
American Bollywood- G
Wake Up- Finally something interesting. I like the beginning snippet. Lyrical. G-Gr
Tomorrow- I like that it start out upbeat. This seems more like their other material that I liked before. G
30.
Black Keys: 60%+24.5 = 84.5 Final (tie-break- 3 Gr vs 0 for Young the Giant)
6 of 10 songs total = 60%
3 Great 4; 1 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 3 Good 3
12+3.5+9 = 24.5
Wild Child- it’s got a bit of darker guitar (bass?) The band is known for. Catchy . Gr.
For the love of money- sounds Mississippi blues. Like the stronger call back to jazz and blues. G-Gr
Good love- it’s a relief to hear instrumental rock again with actual instruments doing jams. Gr
Burn the damn thing down- good opening riff . G.
Happiness- tambourine! Catchy. Gr.
Baby I’m coming home – I like the beat most. Nice to hear true rock. G.
The Logistics (skip if you don’t care about math or the quantitative process):
I only judged good and up ranked songs this year. I threw out OK, meh, and skip bc with streaming those will no longer get listened to. Also, I did a percent of good and up songs per number on the album. Because just stacking an album with garbage songs shouldn’t rank higher either. You have to have good, great awesome songs, no matter the number of tracks. I added the % of tracks that were good and above on the album to the score of the level (elite, A, Gr, G) for the final scores. Highest is best.
For the two bands that put their albums out in installments (Weezer and Young the Giant, Imagine Dragon doesn’t count because I already ranked their entire 1st installment last year) I am going to judge them separately, but also as one unit. So I’ll place each installment in their ranked position, but then I’ll also do a fifth entry for each band judging it as one album.
One last note: I went back and fourth on Brandi. She released some obvious Grammy reminder music this year. They are different versions of her 2021 album, but it’s still the same album pretty much. Other artists like the Indigo Girls have released a double album with rock on one disc and acoustic on the other. And the price point might have been a bit more expensive than just a single disc. But Brandi released her separately–to get more albums sold, acquire more streams, and remind everybody that last year’s album is Grammy nominated. But I think the acoustic version was even more expensive than my signed copy of the original album, and that plus the cheatee numbers game left a bad taste in my mouth. If it had not been one of my top-tier favorite artists of all time, I would have thrown the copycat album away and not bothered ranking it. But it’s Brandi, so I included it. And she’s amazing so of course it ranked high. But I counted it as a half number so as not to throw off the totally legit albums in the ranking. So there’s that, Brandi is making me messy. Again.
Starting from the bottom of the list (lowest scores):
Last
Drake: 0%
0 of 14 total songs = bad
Too much repetition. Too much auto tune! Very sparse and simplistic backing and production. I don’t get it… Sometimes I realize music is not for me. But honestly I don’t know who this is for. It sounds like amateurish copycat of Kanye made in someone’s home studio. It is minimal techno with auto tune vocals over it.
52.
Trampled by Turtles: 9.09%+3 = 12.09 Final
1 out of 11 total songs = 9.09%
1 Good 3
3
I was super-disappointed in this album for the 2nd (3rd?) time. I guess I’m not really a fan of the band like I thought, because it’s too slow and dreary. I’m a fan of the album, Palomino. I liked the fast bluegrassy-hipster ones like It’s a War and those seem to be gone from the remainder of the catalog…
Burlesque Desert Window- G.
51.
Jewel: 25%+10 = 35 Final
3 of 12 total songs = 25%
2 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 1 Good 3
7+3 = 10
Alibis- very poppy. Doesn’t sound like 90s her at. All. Catchy though. G-Gr
Dance sing laugh love- it’s like a song of a pillow or canvas frame. All we’re missing is the word wine somewhere. It’s catchy and hopeful if not cheesy G.
No more tears- her singing sounds forced. Trying too hard. He sounds so much like Elton John here! The I will rounds and love harmony is the highlight of the song. Darius Rucker does an outstanding job. G-Gr.
50.
Marren Morris:25.00% + 13 = 38 Final
4 of 16 total songs = 25.00%
1 Great 4; 3 Good 3
4+9 = 13
I have to say, I was SUPER disappointed with this effort from Marren. I loved her first album, and it was full of heart and spunk. I hated to rank this album so low, but I just couldn’t get into it. This one seems like she’s too happy, too settled, and not digging deep for real material. Most of the songs were slow and quiet. I hope she comes back on her next album with something she cares about and with more hyped up music.
Circles Around this Town- catchy. Story of how she came to be a famous singer. Comes off like she had it kinda easy. Little bit unlikeable. Like the call back to church song. G.
Nervous- like the edgier guitar. Finally some harder, more excited stuff. Singing with more emotion. Love the bit of edge. Gr.
X Tall Guys- silly topic but catchy and description. Really dumb lyrics. Maren needs some tragedy in her life to get some quality material. I had this ranked “Good,” but couldn’t handle the dumb lyrics so made it a skip.
Detour- catchy. Actual singing. Western backing. Like the cowboy interlude. Sounds like a walking or horsing beat. Notes-brief. G.
Good friends- nice to hear women appreciate friendship. Slow. G.
49.
Jack Johnson: 30%+9.5 = 39.5 Final
3 of 10 total songs =30%
1 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 2 Good 3;
3.5+6 = 9.5
Don’t Look Now- a little faster and more memorable. Slightly catchy. G.
Costume Party- lyrics interesting thought experiment and comparison. G.
Any Wonder- slow and quiet. Emotive. Notes. G-Gr
48.
Jason Aldean- 26.67%+13.5 = 40.17 Final
4 of 15 total songs = 26.67% good and up
1 Great 4; 1 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 2 Good 3;
4+3.5+6 = 13.5
Trouble with a heartbreak- you can’t physically travel away from your emotions. Catchy. G-Gr.
Good made airplanes- nice insinuation of the thesis of the last song. G.
Holy water- does she miss him too? G
Your mama- sweet love song to moms. It’s not too much. Gr.
2012 song. Take a little ride (live lv)- fun to hear the crowd reaction. G.
2019 song. Blame it on you (live)- catchy. G.
47.
Florence and the Machine: 28.57%+14 = 42.57 Final
4 of 14 total songs = 28.57%
1 Great 4; 2 Gr-G cusp 3.5; 1 Good 3
4+7+3 = 14
Free- catchy. Relatable. Abusive relationship. G
Dream Girl Evil- catchy. Psychology. G-Gr
Daffodil- drama. The backing music reminds me of a machine army. Drums increase tension. Gr.
Alice fell asleep in Wonderland. That’s how I would describe the album. It’s experimental, but down-tempo, low-key. Background music, with distortion.
Mother Please Don’t Be Sad: Is my favorite so far. There is cello and piano and instrumentally, it’s a beautiful, interesting piece. I could take or leave the words–mostly leave, but the concerto makes up for it.
When We Die When We’re Highs: Very marching band. Snare and xylophone. There is just not enough xylophone in mainstream music today!
Assassins of Youth: Video game sounds. Playing with tempo, and maybe some subtle moag. Digital beeping with a steady beat. It caught my attention.
My Religion is You: I love that moag, deep and vibrational.
These last 3 songs, finally woke me up. I nearly didn’t finish listening to the whole album, because I thought I could tell where it was headed. I’m glad I didn’t abandon it before it got better. I wish Flaming Lips had released an EP with the latter-part of the album.
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