Considering recent events I would be remiss not to address the whole 1975 guy and Taylor “dating” so I’m just going to briefly pause the Taylor Swift’s Gay Moments series to talk about it. I have the next 2 posts all ready to go when we resume.
But before I get into that let me give you a history of my exposure to Taylor Swift:
It’s hazy (excuse the pun) when I became a fan of Taylor Swift. I just vaguely remember her being there. She sort of snuck into my life through hearing her singles at the grocery store, or on the radio on the way home from work. I wasn’t really her target audience- I was a bit older than her, just a peripheral country music fan, and I don’t like dudes.
More and more I was hitting repeat on my ipod on her songs. I especially like what I consider her red marker songs. All the ones with anger and bitterness and revenge as the main themes. I don’t know what that says about me, but my insurance only covers 3 counseling sessions per year, so I guess I’ll have to wait to find out. Anyway, I was especially moved by You’re not Sorry, Mean, and Should’ve Said no. I listened to those over and over (no literally, as the song was ending I would push that left side of the circle and play it again) in the car to and from my IVF appointments.
Sidenote: I had to drive 2.5hr from my college town to Kansas City to get paps, blood tests, and hormones as an egg donor. Each session was 3 or 4 months, and the appointments would start out every 3 weeks or something like that, but as it got closer to harvest the appointments could be as many as 3x a week. I was doing a LOT of driving! And Taylor was with me the whole time.
So I have a lot of sentimental attachment to Taylor’s songs. I did not really know anything about Taylor the person, or even marketer. I was a college student with a job so I legit didn’t have that much time to check it out. Also, I couldn’t afford like a TV package with good channels (this was before streaming was mainstream), had a purple Razor, no data (this was before iphones), and I was on Myspace (hated) Facebook, so you had to proactively search people, they didn’t just fall into your feed. Also, it was during the Limewire and Frostwire days (I wasn’t fancy enough to be able to engage with Apple except for my little ipod) so getting music was a whole ordeal.
When Taylor didn’t have Red on Spotify, I really lost track of her, except for hearing the ubiquitous songs out and about. I knew nothing of her personas, eras, fashion, friends, or concerts. I was working and studying (and poor) most of the times, OK? I sort of heard scuttle about her dating constantly, but didn’t know the specifics. Just heard the misogynous comments around school or in the media.
When I saw the rainbows, butterflies, and adorable aesthetic of the Lover era I re-engaged more than ever. That was my jam. The Me! video (not song) is SO ME. It’s everything I ever loved and I wanted EVERY interview, behind the scenes video, and easter egg decoding. I never even knew the easter eggs were a thing before that.
In searching for content I saw these Kaylor compilation videos on YouTube. Before that moment I had not heard of Kaylor, did not know who Karlie Kloss was, didn’t even know what “shipping” was and was completely oblivious of stanning and fan culture. Boy, did I get an introduction! I clicked on the video because Taylor and a model looked very pretty on the cover. As I watched I was agog. As a lesbian, I knew THE LOOK and the way these two looked at each other, the body language, the chemistry–was undeniable. Nobody told me about Kaylor, I had never read about this, but I could see it. After that I found two very interesting podcasts: Taylor Talk and TayDar. I loved the song analysis, and was very curious to find out about everything I had missed over the years (hint: everything but the popular songs). I got on Tumblr, went to Reddit, and Googled a lot of power-points. I was down the rabbit hole.
Then I became obsessed, as you’ve seen. Part 2 we’ll discuss what’s happening now.
Dear reader/If it feels like a trap, you’re already in one…/…Get out your map, pick somewhere and just run…/…Burn all the files, desert all your past lives/And if you don’t recognize yourself/That means you did it right/Never take advice from someone who’s falling apart…/…(You should find another)/…Bend when you can, snap when you have to…/…You don’t have to answer, just ’cause they asked you…/…The greatest of luxuries is your secrets…/…So I wander through these nights/I prefer hiding in plain sight/My fourth drink in my hand/These desperate prayers of a cursed man/Spilling out to you for free/But darling, darling, please/You wouldn’t take my word for it/If you knew who was talking/If you knew where I was walking/To a house, not a home, all alone ’cause nobody’s there/Where I pace in my pen and/My friends found friends who care/No one sees when you lose/When you’re playing solitaire/You should find another guiding light/Guiding light/But I shine so bright…/…You should find another/Guiding light/But I shine so bright/You should find another
We know Taylor drinks wine. And she’s talked about liquor, like whiskey. But I’m not sure beer is her go-to choice of beverage. You know what makes a lot of sense to me in a song to her ex? bearDs. She’s telling her ex that she’s fine with bearding and crying because she chooses her career over love. And no, it’s not wishful thinking or a reach. This phenomenon is repeated several times in the TS catalog.
CLOSURE
beers/beards
There are several more words that Taylor pronounces in a way that could mean two distinct words:
This song has additional auditory illusions because the main lyrics have a backing echo layered with it.
My program won’t transcribe proper nouns so I subbed “car lee” for Karlie. It shouldn’t make a difference as the phoneme, syllables, and stress are the same.
Auditory Illusion:
Your expectations of which words you’ll hear—coupled with the low-quality audio—do the rest. “When faced with an acoustic signal which is somewhat ambiguous because it is low-quality or noisy [or layered with backing vocals], your brain attempts a ‘best fit’ between what is heard and the expected word,” Valerie Hazan, a professor of speech sciences at University College London, told The Telegraph.
There were some even cooler designs but WordPress is a Bit(H and nothing would fit the banner without cutting out practically everything.
930 x 198 Pixels is a @$%$# Nightmare!
While we’re talking about logistics I also changed up the topics above the header. In keeping with the animal theme, I tried to do some wordplay, but they translate to:
Animals
Places
(Anti) Valentines
School/College/Education
Work/Career
Sexuality/LGBTQQAA
Music
Exercise/Diet
Current Events/News
Analysis of Media/Vocabulary
Just click any of those to filter posts by category.
Also, don’t forget about the “search” function in the top right for specific posts or key words. In combination with CTRL F you can find anything you want.
The current popular posts are listed on the right.
Under that is a word cloud to look at posts with a specific tag.
Then there is a list of my few last posts under that.
And finally, there’s a calendar of what I posted by date.
I’m probably overreacting. Looking into things that aren’t there. Maybe being over-paranoid.
I’ve diagnosed someone I don’t know and I only was face to face with one brief time, with a CNS disease. I’m not a doctor or any kind of expert. And this is completely unsubstantiated.
All that said, I felt like Emily Sailers might have Multiple Sclerosis.
We all noticed her voice (which I vehemently defend in another post) which could be a symptom of something. People with MS can have spasmodic dysphonia from it.
More than that I noticed things were different than before. Before last week I had gone to 7 other Indigo Girls’ performances just so you know I have some kind of reference point for their norms. What I’m about to describe could definitely be attributed to:
the fact this was a make-up concert (from Covid cancellation)
it was I think the first show after a break, and before their actual tour kicks off
it was with the symphony
They could have been tired/hot/cold/hungry–whatever
I won’t call it an “off night” by any means (they ALWAYS put on a great show, and did last Sunday as well) but maybe one or both felt off.
They might not like Saint Louis
Maybe they’re still recovering their relationship after the alcoholism we just heard about
I get it. And I AM NOT saying the performance was less than Excellent. I had a lot of fun and was jazzed up. The entire crowd (an unusually straight mix of mostly older straight couples, who I think may have been symphony season ticket holders, not necessarily IG fans) were engaged and really into it. It was just a different dynamic than I’m used to seeing from them. And remember, after I noticed one thing I really started scrutinizing so this could just be my own drama talking.
I couldn’t hear well, but at one point Emily said something like this is a song full of “spit.” I heard “spit” loud and clear, though I absolutely could have missed some kind of joke. But hearing it so fast like that, I got the impression it was more of a word-finding difficulty. I thought she was trying to say something else and accidently said spit instead.
In another comment, Emily told us the following song will “speak truth to power…” Then the song was “Able to Sing” which I have always thought of as a benign, a-political song for a friend’s wedding. I totally could have missed the point of the song, and missed an underlying meaning. But after she said that, I thought–Emily is confused tonight..
During “Chicken Man” the orchestra percussion was distractingly loud. Somebody should have turned it down, because it was a bit overpowering. But it was like that threw Emily off. And I saw the Indigo Girls at Seattle Zoo Tunes. A show where people just go to chat and drink wine and consider the music background. The Indigo Girls ALWAYS get the crowd involved and have everyone riveted to the experience every time I see them. They settle distractions routinely like the pros they are. I’ve never seen even an inkling that either are thrown off by a chaotic audience. They masterfully reign in unruly crowds. Anyway, I think the drums made her lose her place and Emily messed up a part of the song. And in my memory (which could be faulty) I think I even saw Amy’s hands fly after the song was over in a fit of exasperation.
They did “Love of our Lives” during the concert, which is normally an Emily-led song. But it seemed like Amy was taking the lead this time. And that may have been a pre-planned change. But it also could have been a spur of the moment save, because I’ve never heard the song like that before.
Several times it reminded me of Carter helping Boyd-Amy turned her body toward Emily as if to deliberately play to help her back on track. And Damn it anyway! I looked at length to find one of the clips that I’m thinking of from DMB, but to no avail. There are several times when Boyd had a violin solo and it was off beat or too slow, always out of tune. Anyway, Carter would like look at Boyd and do more drumming than usual–like metronoming him to help keep him on course. I thought I saw Amy turning toward Emily several times in more of a helping way, than a vibing way…
As a matter of fact, Amy seemed frustrated with Emily at times, and their chemistry just wasn’t the same as every other time I’ve seen them.
Once I was looking for possible symptoms, I noticed Emily was very careful around the cords on the floor. She gingerly stepped around it at least 3 different times. This might be her normal, but I never looked for it before, or noticed at previous shows.
Anyway, I had fun, fun, fun at an awesome show as usual, but went home a bit sad. I couldn’t sleep all night. I hope Emily is OK. I hope she’s on top of her health and seeing doctors and specialists for ANYthing unusual. And I hope the Indigo Girls don’t quit the band/break up the Indigo Girls. Worst nightmare! The Indigo Girls have been so influential in my life I would hate for anything bad to happen. But like I’ve said throughout this post, hopefully this is just my own confirmation bias 😦
The songs on Reputation are packed with meaning, and there are many rabbit holes to go down. As such, this post would be too long if I included each song as I did with Debut, Fearless, Speak Now, Red, and 1989. I’ll release these song by song.
Reputation (11/10/17)
Don’t Blame Me
I think this is Taylor Swift’s best song. Though in my ranking some sentimental favorites were above it. There’s a lot of religious guilt and internalized homophobia, but also sexy stuff. Also, Taylor really belts on this one and I love that and wish she would do it more.
Don’t blame me, love made me crazy/If it doesn’t, you ain’t doin’ it right/Lord, save me, my drug is my baby/I’ll be usin’ for the rest of my life…/…Toyin’ with them older guys/Just playthings for me to use/Something happened for the first time, in/The darkest little paradise/Shakin, pacin’, I just need you/For you, I would cross the line/I would waste my time/I would lose my mind/They say, “She’s gone too far this time”…/…And baby, for you, I (I) would (would) fall from grace/Just (just) to (to) touch your face/If (if) you (you) walk away/I’d beg you on my knees to stay…/…I get so high, oh/Every time you’re, every time you’re lovin’ me/Trip of my life, oh/Every time you’re, every time you’re touchin‘ me
The higher the score, the more that person suffers from internalized homophobia:
I like to spread my posts out so the go up daily, but I AM TOO EXCITED about this! Here’s part 2 that I promised with the Sister Songs post:
You remember Myspace, right? Here’s this in case you don’t (this comes back later)
People thought Katy was alluding to a manufactured feud. I think (based on context) that Katy is talking about: sapphic, closeting, bisexuals/lesbians in the music industry, etc, etc… You’ll see what I mean, I’m about to show you.
Was Katy Perry calling out the fact that Taylor Swift had a young beard (dancers in drag/performing sexuality/gay males)? Instead of coming out of the closet?
Enter Bad Blood:
We know who the song is supposed to be about. But do we know the REAL reason or a manufactured reason to hide the gay of it all? A closeted person cannot call someone out for “outing” them, because, well, that’s the point. Instead Taylor has to use subtext to get her message across to Katy without pouring fuel on the (gay) fire.
Bad Blood
You know it used to be mad love…/…Now we got problems/And I don’t think we can solve ’em/You made a really deep cut…/…I was thinking that you could be trusted/Did you have to ruin/What was shining? Now it’s all rusted/Did you have to hit me/Where I’m weak? Baby, I couldn’t breathe/And rub it in so deep/Salt in the wound like you’re laughing right at me…/…Did you think we’d be fine?/Still got scars on my back from your knife/So don’t think it’s in the past/These kind of wounds they last and they last/Now did you think it all through?/All these things will catch up to you…/…If you live like that, you live with ghosts (ghosts, ghosts)/Band-aids don’t fix bullet holes (hey!)/You say sorry just for show …/…Hm, if you love like that, blood runs cold/’Cause baby, now we got bad blood
I think the bolded portions especially, show my point that Taylor is talking about an ex that outed her
The Feud:
SHE TRIED TO…OUT…ME
Katy’s Transgressions:
First loud encouragement in song (see my other post for the deets)
Taylor has been alluding to her sexuality the whole time, we just weren’t paying attention. Given the lyrics I think she is Lesbian w/major comp-het: I have interspersed Taylor’s early Myspace post and sus song lyrics:
Fearless:
The entirety of:
Haunted
This song will get its own post.
Fearless-
Well you stood there with me in the doorway/My hands shake/I’m not usually this way but/You pull me in and I’m a little more brave/It’s the first kiss, it’s flawless, really something, it’s fearless/Cause I don’t know how it gets better than this/You take my hand and drag me head first/Fearless/And I don’t know why/But with you I’d dance in a storm/In my best dress/Fearless
Fifteen-
Feeling like there’s nothing to figure out…/…This is life before you know who you’re gonna be…/…When all you wanted/Was to be wanted/Wish you could go back/And tell yourself what you know now
Love Story-
So I sneak out to the garden to see you/We keep quiet, ’cause we’re dead if they knew…/…’Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter/And my daddy said, “Stay away from Juliet”…/….Romeo, save me, they’re tryna tell me how to feel/This love is difficult, but it’s real/Don’t be afraid, we’ll make it out of this mess…/…Is this in my head? I don’t know what to think
Hey Stephen-
Hey Stephen, I’ve been holding back this feeling/So I’ve got some things to say to you (ha)…/…But I never seen nobody shine the way you do/The way you walk, way you talk, way you say my name/It’s beautiful, wonderful, don’t you ever change/Hey Stephen, why are people always leaving?/I think you and I should stay the same…/…So come on and come out…/…And shine, shine, shine
You Belong with Me-
That what you’re looking for has been here the whole time/If you could see that I’m the one/Who understands you/Been here all along/So, why can’t you see?/You belong with me/Standing by and waiting at your backdoor/All this time how could you not know, baby?
The Way I Loved You-
He says everything I need to hear, and it’s like…/…I feel perfectly fine…/…He respects my space/And never makes me wait/And he calls exactly when he says he will/He’s close to my mother/Talks business with my father/He’s charming and endearing/And I’m comfortable…/…I couldn’t ask for anything better/He can’t see the smile I’m faking/And my heart’s not breaking/‘Cause I’mnot feeling anything at all/And you were wild and crazy/Just so frustrating, intoxicating, complicated/Got away by some mistake and now/I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain/It’s 2 a.m. and I’m cursing your name/I’m so in love thatI acted insane/And that’s the way I loved you/Breaking down and coming undone/It’s a roller coaster kind of rush/And I never knew I could feel that much/And that’s the way I loved you
Untouchable-
Untouchable like a distant diamond sky/I’m reaching out and I just can’t tell you why/I’m caught up in you…/…Untouchable, burning brighter than the sun/And when you’re close, I feel like coming undone
Forever and Always-
Was I out of line?/Did I say something way too honest, made you run and hide…/…Thought I knew you for a minute, now I’m not so sure…/…Here’s to silence, that cuts me to the core/Where is this going?/Thought I knew for a minute, but I don’t anymore
I said, “Leave“, but all I really want is you/To stand outside my window, throwin’ pebbles/Screamin’, “I’m in love with you”…/…And don’t you leave, ’cause I know/All I need is on the other side of the door/Me and my stupid pride are sittin’ here alone…/…I keep goin’ back over things we both said/And I remember the slamming door/And all the things that I misread/Oh, babe, if you know everything/Tell me why you couldn’t see/When I left, I wanted you to chase after me, yeah/I said, “Leave”, but all I really want is you…/…And the conversation with the little white lies…/…And I broke down crying, was she worth this mess?/After everything and that little black dress/After everything I must confess, I need you
Today was a Fairytale-
All that I can say/Is now it’s getting so much clearer/Nothing made sense ’til the time I saw your face/Today was a fairytale
You All Over Me-
I lived, and I learned/And found out what it was to turn around/And see, that we/Were never really meant to be/So I lied, and I cried/And I watched a part of myself die/’Cause no amount of freedom gets you clean
What can I say–I enjoy research, and lyrical analysis, and I know my posts can get looooong. I decided to repost pieces to give a more bite sized chunk of information. I’m calling the series TS Snippets, because I couldn’t meld Swift into snippet without making it confusing.
Baby boy, boyish look, baby love, etc… Seem out of place for a grown-a$$ man, but Taylor routinely uses them in her songs.
This song isn’t quite a happy reminiscing. There’s both sadness and determination in the lyrics. The thesis is that Taylor has felt alone in every stage of her life: Her dad was MIA during her childhood either physically or emotionally. She was bullied in school at times. Her country label made her feel inadequate by creating her “perfect” alter-ego and hemming in her creativity. Dating men and being a beard made Taylor feel empty. 1989 Era was fun, but felt inauthentic and lonely and Taylor was secretly struggling. After the Kaylor breakup Taylor feels hopeless that she can ever genuinely love, because she sees it as problematic for her career. Currently Joe (her supposed partner) is absent. But because of all the loneliness and isolation, Taylor has honed her writing and furthered her career. Despite not being able to count on anyone aside from her mother, nobody can take away Taylor’s writing skills.
A lot of it has earmarks of the move to NYC and the 1989 Era, but I do think Taylor looks back further in time within the song. She talks about playing in parking lots when she was trying to get started. She may also be looking at her life as a whole and mentioning how she still feels like she’s on her own.
Theory: I hope I can explain what I’m thinking clearly. Taylor wrote the song in a chronological timeline (A-present day, B-1989 Era, C-Nashville, D-parents). Then, to obscure the timeline and subjects within the song she took the most recent (A) and made each line it’s own verse. Then she took 1989 Era (B) and made that the 2nd line of each verse. Then she broke the Nashville (C) into the 3rd line of each verse. And finally she made her childhood/parents (D) the final line of each verse. It’s possible each verse starts at the present (2022), mentions 1989 Era, goes back to Nashville, and ends with her childhood. Instead of AAAA, BBBB, CCCC, DDDD she mixed it to ABCD, ABCD, ABCD, ABCD.
For example:
A-Smoking with your boys could be her current situation with Joe. She’s in a house, not a home, alone. He’s off living his separate life, high like the night they met (Paper Rings).
B-The face Taylor wishes she could touch is Karlie’s but they’ve broken up.
C-The town Taylor wants to leave (for NYC) is Nashville.
D-The only one that can bring Taylor back to TN over a lifetime is her mom.
That might be loosely the formula Taylor used in the song. Does it hold up? See what you think…
Since the subjects of the song are unclear, and may change, and the timeline is not set in stone, I tried to think of all scenarios that could fit each line. Taylor didn’t call and tell me the specifics so I’m trying to gather the keys I do know about in order to get the gist.
Summer went away
Taylor doesn’t tell us the year she’s singing about, just the season. Later in the song she talks about moving out of Nashville so I’m guessing most of this song is about 2014.
Taylor also mentions starving her body in the song and she was at her thinnest during the 1989 era:
Still, the yearning stays
Taylor also does not tell us what type of yearning she’s been feeling, or for how long:
A boy?
Her dad?
To be discovered?
Her family after she moved from TN to NY?
Gay love in general (or Dianna, specifically)?
The word can be used several different ways:
I play it cool with the best of them
I wait patiently
We know Taylor doesn’t sit back, waiting around to make music, or for her career to progress. She takes action and proactively strives for more success. But what then, is Taylor waiting for?
Her Dad?
Tolerate It:
Jake Gyllenhaal?
I don’t know if Jake was a real relationship or beard to cover for Jake’s sexuality and/or the Dianna Agron romance. I used to be certain it was bearding, but when Red (TV) drudged up this decade-old relationship, and Taylor insinuated the red scarf did symbolize her virginity as Swifties suspected, I was no longer sure.
Dianna?
Come Back, Be Here (2012):
He’s gonna notice me
After I read this line I wondered if 2012 Taylor was looking back to the beginning of her career. Is she remembering trying to break into the country music scene? 1989-Era Taylor could be thinking back to her start in country music because she was about to try to fully break into pop music.
Is HE $cott Borchetta or other music execs?
Is HE her dad?
Taylor could be talking about how her dad is always traveling for business, when she’s home, and how he stays home with her brother while she tours. Her mom is involved in her life, but her dad is absent.
Is HE Jake Gyllenhaal?
Whatever they had together, it was on and off:
We are never ever getting back together:
Dianna Agron?
Of course, if Jake was just a bearding situation all of the above applies to Swiftgron.
Come Back, Be Here (2012):
We are never ever getting back together:
It’s okay, we’re the best of friends
Taylor wasn’t really best friends with studio execs, her dad, Jake, OR Dianna (they were very secret lovers) so I’m not sure this line is directly referencing any of the subjects that are options for the previous line.
If this line IS talking about the subject of “he’s gonna notice me” then I think Taylor is contrasting her parents. Her dad doesn’t notice her, but that’s OK because her mom is her best friend.
If “I wait patiently he’s gonna notice me” is her dad and the best friend is her mom the song is describing how Taylor feels a hole in her life and goes to great lengths to put a bandaid over it by gathering friends and fans around her, and focusing on her music career. She is saying because she feels a void in her parental relationships she has spent the time writing and making music which brought her all the friends and fans and fame.
My impression was that this line is doing two things: Talking about the subject of the previous line and being used as a tool to put the story and the listener back in the correct timeline (1989 Era and The Squad). For the latter, Taylor says it’s alright that HE doesn’t notice her because she has formed her own friend group that distracts her and makes her feel better.
Anyway
I hear it in your voice
Is Taylor saying this person is more dismissive when they’re with their friends?
OR
Is she saying the voice literally sounds different when this person is smoking?
Tobacco:
Smoking weed could also change the sound of someone’s voice:
And it’s possible, but not a rule:
You’re smoking with your boys
I couldn’t find any evidence Scott Swift smokes.
I couldn’t find any evidence Scott Borchetta smokes.
I saw Karlie Kloss has NEVER smoked.
Is the smoker a lover/ex?
Jake-
He has smoked for movies, but he also smoked cigars and pipes at some point in time:
Jake G. also has been known to smoke weed:
Dianna-
She has also smoked for roles, and has been seen in public with a box of cigarettes:
I couldn’t readily find anything about Dianna smoking weed, so if she does it seems she does it on the DL.
Joe-
He is the wrong timeline for this song, but I bring him up because Taylor talks about the beginning of her career in the song, so it’s possible she talks about a more current boyfriend/beard leaving her (emotionally) on her own as well.
Joe smokes, but I think the Taylor Swift team cleaned up his image scrubbed the internet to be an appropriate partner for her.
Paper Rings could be talking about meeting Joe and his mates who were high. It would have to be his friends attending the MET Gala according to the most popular timeline of their relationship:
But also, Joe might be a is a cover for Karlie. And that brings us back to the correct timeline for this song: I think Paper Rings is for Karlie, and could allude to the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show where Taylor and Karlie [supposedly] met. Taylor could be talking about how the other models were high at that 2013 show:
I touch my phone as if it’s your face
This gesture seems too romantic in nature to be a studio exec or father. Taylor could have changed subjects after the “he’s gonna notice me” line. It also rules out beards, because she wouldn’t long for their attention-it’s a business relationship. This line, possibly the whole song might be talking about a romantic relationship:
Dianna-
Come Back, Be Here (2012):
Karlie-
It can’t be Karlie because she doesn’t smoke. She wouldn’t be smoking with her boys. It would also require this line to be another time jump, because during the 1989 Era Taylor and Karlie were constantly seen together. It wasn’t until later that Taylor was alone and longing to touch Karlie’s face.
I didn’t choose this town
Nashville?
It was Taylor who wanted to move to Nashville in order to break into the music business. Her parents say they didn’t want to pressure her to succeed, so they let her think the move was their idea.
London or New York?
This could be interpreted two ways: Taylor is talking to someone who lives in London in this song and says she didn’t choose this town (London).
OR
Taylor could be saying Karlie was the one who chose NYC, but she had wanted to move to London.
I dream of getting out
Taylor dreams of leaving the afore-mentioned town?
She never lived in London so she doesn’t dream of moving away.
Taylor seems to have loved NYC until her and Karlie split and she couldn’t bear to be reminded of Kaylor, so if she’s talking about NYC (not a town) it requires another time jump.
That leaves Nashville. Though Taylor wanted/needed to move to TN to get a foot in the door to music, she tired of it quickly. Taylor was bullied in middle school, and she felt constricted in the red state.
There’s just one who could make me stay
A romantic partner/ex?
Dianna-
After 2012, it looks like Dianna was traveling back and forth to Australia, living in CA, and also spending time in the UK. It looks like “staying” isn’t Dianna’s strong suit, so I don’t think this line is about her.
Karlie in NY?
It’s plausible Taylor is saying that Karlie is the only person who could have kept her in the U.S., but I’m not sure because it’s not like Taylor adamantly didn’t want to live in NYC.
All my days
This addendum made me think more about a blood relative, than a romance which is not guaranteed to last a lifetime. Taylor talks about wanting to leave Nashville due to feeling restrained and trapped there. But the one thing that can pull her back through a protracted timeframe is her mom.
Her mom in TN?
From sprinkler splashes to fireplace ashes
Sprinkler splashes brings to mind exuberance and warm sunshine fun. Fireplace ashes alludes to endings. Taylor talks about things burning down in many songs. To her, fire and burning are something scary and awful that destroys. A break-up, panic about being outed, a ruined career:
After this destruction, the ashes are the only remnant of what used to be.
My Tears Ricochet-
Hoax-
In this line Taylor went from happy, sunny fun to the debris left from a fire [drastic cause of destruction]. She could be talking about a combination of things that tie the song together: childhood fun with her parents, or the 4th of July parties The Squad attended, to break-ups.
Her dad?
Taylor’s relationship with her father started out admiring, and considering him a protector of her, “My daddy’s gonna show you how sorry you’ll be.” Later the relationship with her dad was stalled–he was often absent from Taylor’s life. Then he only tolerated her [sexuality?] and finally when he [maybe] cheated on her mom there was not quite estrangement, as he is heavily involved with Taylor’s career, but a schism formed.
$cott Borchetta/studio?
Taylor could secondly be bringing up her relationship with $cott Borchetta and her label at large. Getting signed started out a dream come true, hopeful and exhilarating, ended in oppression, then ruins when he sold her masters.
Jake G.?
He could be an option here as well. Taylor might have gone into it with optimism. Whether she had comp-het and was trying to make a straight coupling work, or if she was thrust into a bearding situation, she seemed sincere in trying to make it work. At the end, Taylor was jaded (either toward men or the bearding process).
Dianna?
She could also work here. Swiftgron was red and passionate, but Dianna was gone all the time, and there may have been cheating on both sides of the relationship, until their romance was obliterated beyond repair.
The Squad?
The time period of this song seems to be mostly the 1989 Era so Taylor could be bringing up The Squad. I think she hired them to distract from her boy crazy image. The 4th of July parties looked mostly like photo-shoots to me. Then after the 1989 Era put friendships in the forefront instead of boys, the group disintegrated and “we’ll never say that word again.”
Karlie?
Lastly, Taylor could be looking at all her relationships throughout her life and evoking how she and Karlie were both made of ashes at the end of Kaylor.
I waited ages to see you there
Taylor describes waiting for whoever she was talking about in the last line over ages. Career-wise she could be talking about from the time she was a child to before she was a household name. Taylor waited a long time, and also over many birthdays to be recognized as the musical prodigy that she is. And the 1989 Era solidified Taylor’s place as a pop star.
Her fans?
Taylor’s father?
He never really came to her shows or awards. Is she saying she waited ages for him to show up for her:
Jake or Dianna?
This line brings to mind, The Moment I Knew:
If Taylor is talking about Jake it brings up the 21st Birthday mythology that he was a no-show.
Dianna was not there a lot of times, which was a central issue in the Swiftgron relationship.
And if she’s talking throughout her life, Taylor could be telling Karlie that when she’s with Jo$h and not her, it wrecks Kaylor.
I search the party of better bodies
The party of beautiful people could be some sort of music networking thing that Taylor went to in order to get known and break into the industry, or even when she was trying to cross over to pop:
The party might be talking about any event Taylor attended with the models. Is she talking about The Squad?
The party could be some awards pre or post party where Jake or Dianna attended. For example Taylor, Dianna, and Lea Michele all went to the 2014 MET Gala:
Just to learn that you never cared
Scott Borchetta/her country label?
The Squad/fake friends/paid PR-
Jake G.?
All Too Well Short Film:
It wasn’t real to him because she was his beard?
But innocent Taylor was not on the same page. She saw a future with Jake, and was shocked when he suddenly broke things off:
You’re on your own, kid
You always have been
I see the great escape
So long, Daisy May
Who is Daisy May, and what characteristics is Taylor trying to highlight?
Daisy Mae Scragg of Lil’ Abner comic strip-
Daisy Mae Dutten of video game Bullworth Academy-
Daisys that aren’t Maes:
Daisy Buchannan of The Great Gatsby-
Like Anti-Hero this may be Taylor’s critical side. She could see herself as these traits when she is in her self-hating mode.
Daisy Kenyon in the film of the same name-
I picked the petals, he loves me not
Or maybe it’s none of those characters, and Taylor (tagged as the daisy) is just referring to herself:
Taylor leaves painful situations to write and to focus on her career ambitions.
From sprinkler splashes to fireplace ashes
I called a taxi to take me there
She is saying she had nobody to drive her because she was on her own. Taylor had to pay someone to take her.
Where is Taylor at and where is she going?
Probably not TN to NYC-
She’s wealthy, but this seems like a long fare.
Maybe she means figuratively. Taylor wants to be a household name, and she does this by bringing a personal touch to her listeners. During the 1989 Era, Taylor called a Taxi company and made an account to pay for all of her fans to get to and from her concert. Gestures like this make for a loyal fan base, which will help Taylor’s music career succeed.
I search the party of better bodies
Aspiring music writers/singers?
Taylor could be looking back at the start of her career during her juncture between country and pop music. She could also be talking about competing with other women for the crown of pop stardom.
Models and actresses joined the squad to bolster their career?
Just to learn that my dreams aren’t rare
You’re on your own, kid
You always have been
From sprinkler splashes to fireplace ashes
I gave my blood, sweat, and tears for this
blood-
Sweat-
I really wanted to find out how long Taylor rehearses choreography for shows and tours, but this must be top secret information. Despite trying for hours to Google different key words I couldn’t find anything that specified in any kind of detail how many hours. I imagine it’s a long time.
A general example of rehearsals (not related specifically to Taylor):
Taylor’s purported 3x weekly workout and treadmill schedule:
Tears-
I hosted parties and starved my body
Taylor divulged she had disordered eating in Miss Americana. I read in 2014 that she weighed 132lb. This might not be accurate at all, who knows, but taking that number for an example it puts her BMI at 18.4 (underweight). Also, I know BMI is a bit antiquated and depends on many variables that are not standardized to everyone. But I’m trying to show some kind of quantitative example, so just go with it. At 5’11” Taylor could weigh up to 178lb and be in a healthy weight range, per the BMI calculator.
This is 1989 compared to Reputation:
Like I’d be saved by a perfect kiss
In her country years Taylor had an idealized vision of what love should look like. She seemed to draw from Disney and other fairytales in her youth.
Kisses in Taylor’s songs:
As she got older, Taylor started dating and may have held onto some of that naivety. It seemed like she thought a boyfriend could fix all of her problems. She trusted these guys and seemed genuinely disappointed when they let her down:
Jonas brother-
Jake-
John Mayer-
Later, the boyfriends looked more fake (Tom Hiddleston) and some/all could have been beards. To me, it looks like Taylor was pushed into these showmances and bearding situations (JJ, TL, JG, JM), but then she started hiring her own beards in order to “save” her career from her sexuality. Posing for a photo kissing a man would increase buzz around her music, make her more relatable, (and save Taylor from being outed?).
The jokes weren’t funny, I took the money
What money did Taylor take?
Money from the studio to get started?
Money from fans who believed that Taylor’s genuine stories perfectly matched up with the PR narratives?
Money from celebrities who wanted to hide their sexuality under a beard?
Taylor is tying money to her dating life in this line. She doesn’t like the boy-crazy jokes, BUT she took the money. A definite possibility is that Lautner’s people, Jonas’ people, Jake, and even JM could have paid her for bearding services:
The gossip says that Jake is known for hiring beards:
A meme or a perceptive insight?
My friends from home don’t know what to say
Taylor’s friends are surprised that she is doing inauthentic things they know aren’t in her character in order to grow her career.
I looked around in a blood-soaked gown
The only thing that comes to mind is Carrie:
At first I thought this reference was out of left field, but after reading the following I thought it fit Taylor surprisingly well:
And I saw something they can’t take away
THEY can’t take away Taylor’s writing ability. She honed her skills alone in her bedroom, practiced them in parking lots, and she will always have that.
‘Cause there were pages turned with the bridges burned
The pages turned could be moving on to the next chapter of life, for example, the move from Nashville to NYC. This could additionally be talking about leaving relationships.
This is true about her writing/music too. Songs were cut or never added to the album for whatever reason (a lot were too gay).
Everything you lose is a step you take
With every new start something had to end.
Every song in the crypt contributed to the final product of the finished album [writing is editing!]. And those finalized albums are the stepping stones to the great fame Taylor enjoys(?) today.
Is Taylor talking about something specifically here?
Country/Nashville/home roots?
Jake G. (or men in general)?
It wasn’t working out, but that brought Taylor to the Kaylor relationship (women)?
If Jake was a beard, does the above apply to Dianna?
The Squad/fake friends?
So make the friendship bracelets
During the 1989 Era, bracelets were given to the crowd:
A fan gave Taylor a bracelet with pink and blue and purple beads with the word “pride” spelled out. She displayed it prominently in the below photo:
Take the moment and taste it
I don’t know that much about Buddhism, but there is a philosophy within that talks about living in the moment. And it applies a lot to worry and anxiety. The tenants have subjects of the spirituality be aware of their 6 senses (I think heart is the 6th?) in order to be present at this place in time. It relieves worry and regret which focus on present and past.
Less seriously:
You’ve got no reason to be afraid
You’re on your own, kid
Yeah, you can face this
Renegade-
You’re on your own, kid
You always have been
Where does all of this leave us?
I think Taylor is telling us she has a rift between her and her father. But her mom is someone she can trust, and Andrea loves her unconditionally.
Nashville, country music, and her label made Taylor feel constricted and trapped.
Moving to NYC felt like wonderful freedom and breaking into pop catapulted Taylor to the top of the industry. There was a price to pay for that though-starving her body for just one example.
Jake may have hired/(secretly regarded?) Taylor as a beard. Taylor either didn’t know she wasn’t a real GF, or didn’t understand how Jake could remain cold and detached when acting the part made Taylor catch real feelings for him. It’s also a possibility that Taylor already knew she was queer, and the breakup with Jake hit her hard because she was morning the loss of a straight future she would never have.
With Dianna, Taylor knew she needed more. She wanted someone to be present and consistent and loyal, or it left her unhappy. There could also have been the revelation that she could never fight the logistics to be with a woman. Taylor might have been so upset because her career and Dianna (or any woman) could never coexist.
The Squad felt superficial and empty. Even though Taylor was able to have all the friends she wanted as a kid, it wasn’t satisfying and didn’t last.
Kaylor breakup hit Taylor hard and she is still recovering.
Bearding/Joe protects Taylor’s career but she’s living an isolated life, unable to have a true love. That makes Taylor miserable, but she leans on her music to cope.
/en/tity vs /an/eurysm & /t/
bei/ge/ vs /Gil/lette 
gri/t/ty vs gree/d/y
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