Dear Seattle,

6 Jan

I hate your fucking turbulent housing situation that necessitates having roommates or living with relatives.  If it’s not my own obnoxious, messy, inconsiderate roomies, it’s Kidron’s.  Can I not get out of this constant turmoil?!

What the fuck?!  Why must you be so inconsiderate every night, causing a maelstrom, screaming loudly to your retarded video game friends?  Why do you refuse to pay your deposit, monthly rent, or utilities on time, or in full?  Why are you so ridiculously messy in the bathroom and kitchen, where everyone spends time?  Jesus, you boys are so fucking annoying!  I am super-irritated with the whirlpool of trouble surrounding Seattle-housing.

And don’t get me started on these pussy landlords that cause me such an agitated state of mind.  They have power to do something about shit-head roommates, but chose to remain apathetic.  If someone doesn’t pay, if it’s late, if the payment isn’t in the correct amount, kick them the FUCK out.  If the brothers start a physical fight, possibly damaging property or potentially injuring other tenants, get them out.  Immediately!  Better yet, don’t let a triple felon with terrible credit live here in the first place.  Don’t pawn off your job of collecting rent to a random roommate in the house.  Don’t try to weasel out of your responsibilities by putting the utilities in one of the tenant’s names so as not to incur credit dings or late fees.  Lastly, don’t make finding new tenants the responsibility of existing tenants.  Grow some balls and do YOUR job.

I want Kidron to move the fuck out of this eddy of pond-scum she has gotten herself into, even if it is a pain in the ass!!!!  Sleeping at night and not living in filth with dirty, pot-smoking roommates would be really super.  I want the Charybdis to be over already!

Thanks for nothing, Seattle

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